I recently got into a big fight with my b/f over our child...his mother likes to let the newborn lay on her chest and she fgalss asleep with her like that!! I am so against that I mean..anything canhappen..piont is he wont tell hismother to stop because in his eyes..shes had kids before me so she knows more..!! I am her mother nad I don't want that ..What do I say to him so that he understands that even though he is the father I am her MOTHER! , that its not his mother's child! and he should back me up as our child's father and as my b/f ?
2006-06-11 13:44:14 · 5 answers · asked by Baller B 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
i understand...it happens grandmother's think that just because they had experience they know more and it's true but now that your new, you gotta get the experience, everyday learn something new on how to take care your child or to know more about your child and yes it is your child, just as the grandma commands her children, you command yours and you b/f needs to get things straight....you the mom his the dad and you take care of your baby not the grandma maybe once in a while OK....but you guys gotta have a long talk...calmly and set things right and you need to talk to the grandma...if u don't like something...tell her...or she'll keep on doing what you don't like....
2006-06-11 13:52:55 · answer #1 · answered by A.S.IP.W.F.D. 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
I understand what a difficult situation you are in. I had a very over bearing mother in-law (she's passed away now) But when My kids were babies she took the time to tell me how to do everything and had no problem tell me what I was doing wrong at every single step along the way. I did value her opinion and even asked her questions. But she took it too far.
Your lucky it's just your husband nobody in the family would tell her was wrong to her face. She was just the best Mommy in the world mother of 7 children with countless grand children.
I let it go, I sucked it up, until one day She said something like jeez, Ivy after 3 babies you'd think you'd be able to tell if the babies food was too hot, with out looking at a stupid spoon. (I was showing my husband this new spoon that changed colors when it was too hot.)
The comment was mean & hurt full I lost it, we got into a huge fight over it, I refused to step one foot in her house, for almost 2 years. She came to my house when our 4Th child was born. we gave our new daughter her grandma's middle name ( I did love her) but I refused to talk to her. she didn't offer an apology either.
It wasn't long after that she got ill and needed to stop working. I went to the hospital. She apologized we got back on track.
She passed away about 2 years after that.
Basically what I'm saying is if he won't talk to her then you do it, as the saying goes you give them an inch they'll take a mile. So you need to set the boundaries. I missed 2 years with a women that I did love very much.
2006-06-11 21:29:06 · answer #2 · answered by Ivy 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
As the parents you both should decide what is best for your child and you both should back each other up. Talk to him and give him the specific reasons you don't want his mother to let the baby fall asleep on her chest. Maybe a comprimise could be worked out with buying a bassinet or co-sleeper to put the baby in.
2006-06-11 20:51:49 · answer #3 · answered by Starr 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
There has been medical studies done that state it is dangerous for babies to be on their tummy while asleep. It can cause Infant Death Sydrome. Tell your boyfriend's mother that you appreciate her advice but you want the baby on her back when she is sleeping. Refer to the study. Listen to her advice on other subjects as well she may have some helpful information for you but remember you raise the baby as yours.
2006-06-11 20:51:56 · answer #4 · answered by older woman 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you are the mother, the g'ma should understand this.just talk to her.she was a new mom once w/ in laws too.
2006-06-11 20:51:40 · answer #5 · answered by chays 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋