like he doesn't like chubby girls, but I was chubby when we met he knew it and asked me out not me asking him. I have recently started going to the gym not for him but for me I fell like when I get skinny and more guys will start to notice me I will want to leave him, not only because I am getting more attention, but because he tells me things like oh when you loose weight your gonna leave me because then you will be able to find a better guy. Are those things tipical for guys to say to their girlfriends when their chubby. Is it ok for guys to tell their girls to loose wieght?
2006-06-11 12:42:03 · 7 answers · asked by Star 4 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
guys will be guys, but why have you stayed with him this long if you know that he isnt meant for you, ur just going to hurt him if you leave him after being with him after two years. plus if you really love him and he really loves you he wouldnt be saying that kind of stuff maybe you should of left him like a long time ago, you dont deserve that kind of abuse. its emotional abuse hunny and no girl deserves that
2006-06-11 12:46:53 · answer #1 · answered by nay 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
This does not sound good. It has nothing to do with boys will be boys. It sounds like verbal abuse to me. Is he making you feel bad about yourself? Is he lowering your self-esteem? Because these are signs of abuse. You can sugar coat it all you want, but lets cal l a spade a spade. If he really cares about you he would not treat you like that.
Hon, it's obvious that the things he is saying are bothering you or you wouldn't be asking a question. Don't wait until you are 'skinny' and more boys start to notice you. Don't be that insecure about yourself. You're a good person, I can tell that by your question. You don't need a boy in your life to get by or be like the rest of your friends. You be who you are. You be You!!!
Good Luck!
2006-06-11 12:56:54 · answer #2 · answered by Cyndee 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
NO! It is not OK. Sounds to me like he has Insecurity Issues. If he thinks that your going to the gym just to leave him and not for your own health and to feel good about yourself, then he definitely has some insecurity. Be very careful with this relationship. If you decide to end it, do it gently and in a way that will not crush him due to the fact that one with a fragile psyche can be be explosive. Sounds to me like he is hiding behind the mean and hurtful remarks to not get you to better yourself. Gently dump him and find someone that will help and encourage you in whatever you choose to place your direction in life.
2006-06-11 12:54:53 · answer #3 · answered by Richard M 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
My x started doing all kinds of things like getting her nails and hair done all fancy and tanning and it was for a diff guy she liked. I should have treated her better. But if he is mean to you then he should be affraid of loosing you. That's mean for him to say you wouldnt want him if you werent chubby or skinny. He should be with you no matter how you are.
2006-06-11 12:50:12 · answer #4 · answered by Lookinstr8over 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Shedding pounds? Shed him while you're at it. He has some growing up to do. If you decide to keep him maybe you need to grow up too. Only immature, insecure women keep men like him. I feel for you honey, I was in that same place as a young woman and have forever regretted hanging on to him for dear life. I missed out on a lot because of him and would hate to see you do the same. Good luck and good life!!!
2006-06-11 12:56:41 · answer #5 · answered by Mandalawind 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yeah!Its okay if he mean it..in case to your BF well seems he got no self confidence there and being too nag at you as always about your weight.Take this if he truly love you no matter what size you are he will accept it.Now that you lose some weight he nag again telling you that..this and that ....well tell your BF once and for all girl..LOVE AND ACCEPT WHO I AM NOW..
2006-06-11 12:57:16 · answer #6 · answered by effy 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It seems that he is mentally abusing you to keep your esteem low because he knows your are to good for him. If he cant love you for who you are no matter what then you don't need him. Just because he is insecure is not any reason to put you through the emotional ringer. I would find someone who is going to love me no matter what I looked like.
2006-06-11 12:47:06 · answer #7 · answered by lady_to_know 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋