Please, help! How to keep a distance from a woman who is interfering in our most personal parts of life using the excuse of desperately loving my husband and me and that she cares soooooo much? She use to take xanax if we call 5 min later than she expected… I am trying to let her know that I don't like her personal questions, interfering, that we are grow ups, but she is not willing to understand it and give it up until I start to be rude. Then she feels insulted. If she offers me a cake and I say "no, thanks", she will trying repeatedly and will be able to take that cake in her hand and try to put it in my mouth! She is terrorizing all the family by her care, playing some eternal victim but actually, she makes all of us turning around her. I feel my husband sabotages me because he is not able to confront her and support me. But after visiting her, we both feel as if someone sucked all our blood. I have to do something! We are going to spend a part of the summer in her town and I am already going crazy!
2006-06-11 06:52:29 · 6 answers · asked by Aurora 4 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
Set boundaries. If she refuses to accept no, then leave. Any time, anywhere. Don't just take her abuse. Tell her that she is smothering you and the more she does it, the less you like being around her. It might even be good to back off alot and not see or call her as much. Its not up to ya'll to make her happy. Its her own issue to deal with. When you go to visit, tell her days you'll go over, then stick to it. If she calls alot bothering you, screen your calls or say you are busy and hang up. But don't keep letting her do this to you. Leave next time, don't let her force that cake on you!
2006-06-11 07:01:37 · answer #1 · answered by Velken 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You and your Husband need to talk with her about how much you love her but that sometimes you and he are busy and need to finish whatever your doing. Also let her know that you and him need just some time to take care of you and him. Don't allow her to control you two because this is her way of doing it with guilt and how much she loves you and him. Love is good but smothering someone isn't. Visit her when there for short periods of time when there and then go someone else to let her know she can not be this way or it will hurt the relationship with you, Best Of Luck/
2006-06-11 14:03:48 · answer #2 · answered by Krinta 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Oh, you do have a problem!! Your husband is probably chicken to say anything to her. I can't say that I blame him. all I can say when she starts talking about things that you don't want to, just say "I prefer not to discuss this with you." And then walk away. Why would you be spending part of the summer in her town??? I would find someplace far away. Good luck.
2006-06-11 14:01:13 · answer #3 · answered by doglady 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Make an agree with your husband, that he may go to see him mom, but you are no longer going..........unless she releases her hold on you.
It is up to YOU to tell HER, and HIM that. You both need to be strong and stick together to preserve your happiness AND sanity.
2006-06-11 13:58:40 · answer #4 · answered by iyamacog 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
listen from one ear..take it out from the other..ignore her..make faces at her..even then if she dosent understand..make ur hubby fite against her..complain bout her so much 2 him dat he gets fed up and shouts at her..then shell stop interfrin
2006-06-11 14:01:55 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
just keep your visits brief and not too often
2006-06-11 13:55:37 · answer #6 · answered by captures_sunsets 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋