My 35 yr old girlfriend is 5'8" 130lbs and a size 5-6 yet she is obsessed with her weight and figure. She is a knockout on the visual level but nearly every time we get together, she will always make some remark about her body and weight (I'm fat...look at my folds, don't touch my tummy, its chubby etc)
HELP, I am running out of ideas to reassure her that in my eyes she is a "10" inside and out. I know most women are their own worst critic but what do I say when she says " I'm so fat, look?
2006-06-10 19:17:58 · 12 answers · asked by Cdn_Superdave 4 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
She's obviously very insecure about her looks. I doubt anything you could say would make her change. She may be fishing for compliments. I would think that she may be a very shallow individual. Tell her one more time your opinion and state that that's the last time you ever will listen to her put herself down. Maybe if she thinks you've had enough of it she'll quiet down. You do tell her you think she's beautiful without her saying something first don't you?
2006-06-10 19:22:41 · answer #1 · answered by jacquelinebrns 4 · 1⤊ 1⤋
I'm the same size and I can see some areas on my body that I think i could stand to lose some fat from. It's just a girl thing we're our own worse critics which is what i believe to be the leading cause of the prevalence of eating disorders in women not to mention society's portrayal of the "perfect body" in the media. It's a sad reality that so many women out there are going to extreme mesaures just to be thinner. Quite frankly i think it's a disease because even though i know all this is pointless I myself am currently on an extreme diet/workout programme. I wish this would all end. All you CAN do is to tell her how beautiful you think she is and leave the rest up to higher powers.
2006-06-11 02:27:28 · answer #2 · answered by **LeXi** 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Ask her to start seeing herself through your eyes!
Yes the first thing we all look at as women is our weak spots.
Get her to stand in front of you naked if possible and start showing her where all of her good spots are! Does she have great legs? Show her and tell her! A great butt? Again, lightly run your hand across it and tell her how it sticks out nicely!
Her face? Her back, anywhere you can see she looks great, tell her and show her.
As I said, tell her to look in the mirror once in a while and see herself through your eyes.
Once you get her to do this, she will start to feel better about herself!
Good luck
2006-06-13 14:48:25 · answer #3 · answered by ? 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Look man, your gf has a disorder.....she needs professional help or it could turn into something serious....if it hasn't already and you just aren't aware of it.....
People with a negative body image have a greater likelihood of developing ann eating disorder and are more likely to suffer from depression, isoluation, low self-esteem, and obsessions with weight loss.
2006-06-12 11:57:15 · answer #4 · answered by Squirrel 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Let her know that it hurts you to hear her talk like that about herself. That you feel she is that perfect 10 that you stated. Needing constant reassurance is her way of getting some attention out of you, and she might even be trying to get you to call her chubby and such. Girls are complicted and you'll be living with this all your life with any girl you date... just tell her you don't like the way she talks about herself.
2006-06-11 02:24:07 · answer #5 · answered by visionssofaraway 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Go on a website that has a body mass index, type in her weight and height, print out the results for her and tell her to count her blessings.
2006-06-11 02:51:18 · answer #6 · answered by Christy 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
What is ailing your girlfriend has nothing to do with you. She is obsessed with her physical appearance. She has a distorted image of herself and there is nothing you can say to make her feel any better. She needs to seek the counsel of a psychiatrist to get the help she deserves.
2006-06-11 02:26:48 · answer #7 · answered by Kim 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Maby she is saying that around you because she dosne't want you to feel offended and wants to belong with you so she trys to relate to you by saying she too is fat when in reality she isn't Reinforce the fact that your friendship is based on who she is and she is beautiful for who she is not her dress size.
2006-06-11 02:21:53 · answer #8 · answered by xx_muggles_xx 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
lol u poor fella, just tell her she's right 1 day and see how that goes . she will surely defend herself on this so then u can make ur point
2006-06-11 02:23:17 · answer #9 · answered by rummy 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
she is looking for attention... y dont u try to turn it all back on her. like when she says it be like ya i know u are and she will either stop saying it all the damn time or get really pissed..
2006-06-11 02:22:38 · answer #10 · answered by diamondprincezz456 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋