Why do people insist on believing that children who misbehave are just spoiled brats or bad instead of?

Question

trying to see what has changed in the child's life to cause the "bad" behavior?

Answer 1

because the parents are in denial and they dont want to realize that its actually them that are causing the child to misbehave

Answer 2

In a society of "political correctness" and permissiveness it is not uncommon for children who are disobedient or rebellious to be labeled as "spoiled" or a "bad seed". The truth is, when boundaries are desolved, disrespect for the rules becomes a substitute teaching. Many unruly and disrespectful children have parents who reject boundaries in their own lives, or do not make time or effort to discipline them properly, or are simply lazy and are willing to let some child psycotheropist dictate to them what their child needs in the way of guidance. Most perents label themselves as "liberal", but liberal is only another definition for those who do not want to be responsible for their actions or inactions. The child is the one who suffers for it in the long run because other children don't want to play with them and parents see them as a bad influence so they grow up alone within a crowd. Parents today do not understand the difference between correction and discipline, so they do not produce enough of either one. Correction means verbal instruction, discipline means spanking their little rear ends. And before anyone accuses me of being one of those "spare the rod, spoil the child" people, let me say this, "This phrase is not in the Bible!!". The Bible says that the parent that does not discipline their child, "Hates" their child. The child suffers for the lack of parental control when they are young, but society often suffers when they are grown. Without boundaries and discipline a child never learns how to make the right decisions. There are no bad children, only bad parents.

Answer 3

Without knowing the child or the parents a reason for the behavior is impossible to determine. I think that in many cases it is not what changed but what is missing. Like some form of discipline from the childs parents or caregivers. Discipline is one way of showing a child that you care and are interested in what they are doing. Consequences for their actions are important lessons to be learned, if not at home they will be learned in the real world. Ignoring misbehavior or passing it off as a phase is spoiling the child.

Answer 4

I thought that my 6 year son had been spoiled since he was born. When he was 5, i discovered alot of violence in him. I consulted a doctor, and found out that he has bipolar disorder, and at first i didn't want to believe it. After several visits to the doctors, they wanted to remove him from the home, but i couldn't let that be an option. Now he goes to a group once a week, and also has counseling, which has helped a great deal. So, i think if behavioral issue are out of control , you need to seek professional help.

Answer 5

Normally if a child misbehaves, it's called "lack of discipline." But that's not entirely true. I've seen parents put the "smack down" on their children and the kids still continue to act stupid. So, is it ADD? OCD? PTSD? Or is this just a different generation of rock heads? Who the heck knows. You might want to consult with Dr. Spock, child psychologist?

Answer 6

Grasshopper, perhaps the answer lies in the truth as it always does. Your children misbehave because you spoil them. Stop looking for someone to blame, if your kid acts like a little ****, blame yourself. Remember, spare the rod and spoil the child. So if junior acts up, feel free to slap the **** out of him or her! Sounds evil, but in the long run, saves us all a lot of trouble..

Answer 7

That is a great question. I always try to think of the behavior as being bad, not the child. Then, I think about ways to correct the negative behavior. I have a four-year old who tends to get into some mischief from time to time, and it really bothers me when I hear his care giver's telling him that he is a bad boy. It does nothing to help the problem, it only makes him feel bad about himself.

Answer 8

Well that maybe true, but many a times the child is just a brat or bad, yea I know a lot of kids who are troublesome because they've had hard pasts, but a lot of times its just because the parents don't teach the child restraint or manners.

Answer 9

Well now, I don't know.

I remember my childhood fairly well. One thing was clear to me, many kids are mean and cruel.

You're right, environment can play a big part in it, but I'm afraid in recent years most of the scientific evidence is coming down on the nature rather than the nurture side of this age old debate. Who we are really is determined by our genes.

In fact research has shown that environmental factors you are exposed to in your mother's womb will have a bigger influence on your personality in years to come than all the divorces and dead puppies you can poke a stick at.

Sorry to disillusion you, but bad behviour is more ingrained than we would like it to be.

Answer 10

Because half the time they are just spoiled brats. Others see parents give their kids anything they ask for because they throw a fit... therefore when they see another kid throw a fit... they assume the same.