What do i do? Please read details.!!!?

Question

My brother left in a bad way. He was 17 when he left. He is now 18. He left to his moms house, and well, anyways, he is not living with us, and he hardly contacts us. He is joining the marines. I think it will help him. But, I have been really depressed. He and I were really close. I knew he had mental problems but, i Loved him. My depression caused me to do something that i shouldnt have done... anyways, I need help. Every little thing reminds me of him. Songs, my pillow (that used to be his), and pictures. I cry everytime I see him. Or I picture him doing something almost commiting siuicide. (he almost did twice.) I love him. Help. How can I get my mind off of him?

I am do not romanticly love him. I am very sorry if i gave you that idea. He is my half brother. I guess you can say stepbrother. I am always perky, kind and social. I am just depressed when I think about him. Please don't get the wrong idea about me. I am really nice and thoughtful. I don't want to day to much about me on the internet. But, if anyone wants to email me its,

[e-mail]

Thanks. =)

Answer 1

You need to consider some serious counselling. Committing suicide is NOT the answer for him, and it is most certainly not the answer for you.

Your preoccupation with your brother is more than just a little bit unusual. If you had a sexual relationship with him , you already know it was wrong and there is a lot of guilt involved. That makes things even more difficult and if you are depressed, it most certainly doesn't help.

You need to be able to forgive yourself about that aspect of your life. You are NOT a bad person, you have merely made some bad choices. You need to be less involved with him, not more.

The sadness involved with his leaving is NORMAL for a week or a month, or even a few months, but NOT forever. You have to get over it, adjust to the fact that HE is elsewhere, and it might help you to consider that it is GOOD that he is elsewhere considering your involvement and abnormal preoccupation with him. You DO wish him the best, do you not? Well, that's how you can help him, by being HAPPY for him.

Loving someone that is 'taboo' is a difficult thing to handle. It DOES happen, historically has always happened, and will again in our society. Our societal mores do not allow relationships of this type and most societies use the same laws and reasons.

Life needs to be adjusted to, and everyone must grow and adjust, including you. You WILL always love him, you merely need to know how to deal with the fact that you cannot be with him...period.

Answer 2

Wait a minute...do you have romantic feelings for your brother? Excuse the comment if I'm wrong but it seems like there was more going on. He must be your stepbrother. If you were intimate with him and you love him, it will be difficult getting him off your mind. The best you can do is pray for him. If he is going off to the Marines, you can also write him while he's in Basic and tech school because it get's realy tough and he may need someone to talk to. He will probably call his mom pretty soon to tell her the address (get it from her). Well, hope I helped a little. Keep smiling!!

Answer 3

You need to get busy and find ways to spend your time other that sitting in your room with your pillow, pictures and computer. School is almost over so I suggest looking for a summer job in a place with lots of other young people, or finding a volunteer postion in a senior's facility or animal shelter. This will keep you occupied AND help your community. You should also start an exercise plan and a new healthy eating routine, which are guaranteed to lift your moods and make you feel happier!

Answer 4

If you have a way to send him a letter, you should write to him & tell him how much you love & miss him. Tell him how much he means to you. Its natural to miss him since you were so close. It might help you too to keep a journal to write out the thoughts you have.
Maybe you can write to each other once he joins the marines. That way you can keep up some kind of relationship. Although things might seem very hard for you now & maybe hopeless, just remember that life changes very quickly. What is today, may not be tomorrow. You have many choices & chances in life. It's up to you to make your life what you want it to be.

Answer 5

it sounds to me like u don't just love ur brother like a sibling, but like a lover! i hope i just took it wrong tho, cuz if u do love him like that then u need professional help. otherwise if u just love him like a bro and u think hes going to die because he joined the marines. then u need to call him. talk to him let him know how sad u were that he left and tell him that ull keep him in ur prayers while hes away. ask him to keep in touch with u. or if u dont want to be around him n e more or think about him n e more i think that is a bad idea. family should stick together. if u love someone u never will forget them. but if u really want to forget him u need to get rid of all his stuff. and u need to get wraped up in something else, like a boyfriend, a good book, or a hobby. good luck to u and ur brother. my husband just got out of the marines and it is so difficult.

Answer 6

First of all you if you are suffering from depression and it is causing you to do things you shouldn't be... you need counseling.

Secondly, even if your brother didn't leave when he did... he would leave someday. To get married, go to college, or whatever. It is ok to miss your brother, but you need to find other things to keep your mind busy. You can still take the initiative and write him or call him, etc. If he chooses not to respond to you... then you have to ask yourself if he is worth getting all worked up over... when obviously he isn't affected by being away from you nor has any intention of keeping a relationship with you.

Answer 7

Write him a letter. You should keep in touch with him. I went through something similar with my bro. a long time ago and it broke my heart. I didn't stay in touch with him and now years later we are almost Strangers....Even if he says he doesn't want to talk to you still send him Post cards and pictures and stuff and hopefully he will come around. But just remember that guys aren't as lovey as we are sometimes but that doesn't mean they don't care. Time heals Lot's of wounds. Good luck and God bless.

Answer 8

Think about how the Marines will help him. They will teach him how to take care of himself and how to be a fine person. I'll bet he will be happy to see you when he gets out and he will have changed so much for the better you will barely recognize him. This is the best thing he could have done for himself. Be happy for him and be proud.

Answer 9

talk to him and explain that your scared for him. if your afraid he'll commit suicide i think if you talk to him and tell him that you don't want him to, i don't think he will if you talk to him. i think that showing that your worried about him will show him that people care about him. its okay to think about him. you're going to but just try to get it off your mind. go do things and try to have fun.

im always afraid my brothers going to kill himself. because he also has a mental problem. and a lot of times people get impatient with him and yell at him and put him down. just make sure that when you do, do something to him - apoligize and let him know that you love him.

if you want you can contact me if you want someone to talk to. i don't know how old you are but i'm almost 15 so it may be easier to talk to someone you don't know that is about the same age.

good luck

Answer 10

first a foremost im a little nervous your brother is going into the military w/ a mental illness. You need some therapy. You need to know that you will never forget about him he is family.