I am 21 and have always had serious relationships with men. Since my early teens I have been attracted to other girls, but just in a sense where I "check them out". I have noticed that I like to look at others chests and legs, really nice legs are good to look at for me. I have never been emotionally attracted to others, or have ever cared for a relationship with one. I have thought about trying "adultfriendfinder" for another girl that I am attracted to and see if we have anything in common, or if I can get that feeling where I like to be around them. I do have a boyfriend of 2 years, but no one else knows.
What is your suggestion on this? Or is this normal in a weird Freudian way?
2006-06-10 12:32:44 · 23 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
I worded that wrong.. I do have a boyfriend of 2 years.. but he doesn't even know about this. My friends do not know either.
2006-06-10 12:33:48 · update #1
*Normal* in the context I'm using means "normal for a straight female".
2006-06-10 12:55:26 · update #2
I'm not sure what psychologist proposed this, but they compared human sexuality to some sort of bell curve. Most people are not solely interested in only one sex.
You have said that visually you can appreciate women's forms. Maybe that is just one area where you lie closer to the other end of the sexuality curve. Nothing wrong with that, and it may or may not make you bisexual. Looking at women and appreciating hanging out with them does not make you bisexual... being sexually turned on and attracted to women (and men) is.
How does your boyfriend feel about this? Does it bother him? Are you totally ok with your intimate life, or do you feel like it's missing something?
If you are open to exploring things with another woman, go for it. Make sure you current boyfriend is ok with it, or this could damage your relationship. Also be careful and honest with any women you may explore with-- If she is strictly a lesbian, she may have some real issues with you still being really attracted to men. Also, it can be hard to explore/ test the waters without too many emotions involved, so be careful!
Good luck-- we are all made the way we are, go with what feels right to you!
2006-06-10 12:35:05 · answer #1 · answered by thinkofasong 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
The answer to both your questions is yes. Yes, you are bi-sexual (or at least bi-curious) and yes it's normal. Experimentation like this happens quite a bit. Moreso with women usually. Men tend to be more polarized in their sexuality, more either/or, while women tend to fall more in the middle of the Kinsey scale.
-Note to guys: this does not mean all straight women are secretly bisexual, (the percentage is somewhere around 20-25%, and most of those fall in the 'curious' category) it's just quite a bit more than men.
As for your particular situation, you owe it to your boyfriend to explain it to him, especially if you're intending to explore this side of you further. Not telling him and then going on the internet to hunt for chicks would be cheating on him just as if it were a guy. Now, if you tell him and he's fine with it (and chances are he will be if he thinks he's going to get a threesome out of it; whether that's something you're into or not you should make clear to him) you can feel free to pursue a fling.
Also, if you do decide to have a threesome, bear in mind there's a 50-50 chance it will screw up your relationship somehow. And whatever you do, don't do it with someone you know, because then that relationship could get screwed up too.
2006-06-10 19:46:02 · answer #2 · answered by Guelph 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think was your going through is normal. Alot of girls can be curious or fond of other girls. Its not a sin to check girls out or admire how they look. That doesnt mean your bisexual. How is your relationship with your boyfriend? If there are problems you could just be in need of girl time and thats all it might be.
2006-06-10 19:35:07 · answer #3 · answered by andrea lynn 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Until Freud came along, there was no such thing or animal as 'Normal,' there was only 'what people did with people.' Only with the advent of Freud and his labels did people start to think of themselves in terms of these labels, and not wanting to be thought badly of, the people modified their outer behaviours.
In my adolescence, I had raging hormones and their results that scared the hell out of me, but I couldn't talk to anyone about any of it. I had no idea if it was 'normal,' and was afraid that it wasn't. So I stayed dumb.
To achieve a 'normal' score, you have to apply mathematical scores, and to achieve this you need to have the Abnormal High and Abnormal Low, with Normal somewhere in the middle. BUT, to achieve this you also need a cross section of the population for the results, and to achieve this you also need to have 'Abnormals;' it gives the 'Normal' results a validation.
The point is, that these are only 'numbers,' the Labels are there to help with the math when talking about them.
Labels are DANGEROUS things: What's written on them is subjective, biased and prejudiced to both the writer and the reader.
(I speak in broad sweeping terms there, by the way.)
Just go with your desires (taking precautions where necessary, of course) and curiosities.
Regards.
Sash.
2006-06-10 19:52:39 · answer #4 · answered by sashtou 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Its completely normal. There are alot of girls these days that are bi-curious. Just live your life like any other, because your not different because of your attraction to the "ladies" also. Let your b'f know about the situation if you want to tell him. If not, I wouldnt worry about it. As for your friends, it is your choice whether or not you really want them to know. Good Luck and wish you the best if you decide to tell your b'f and friends.
2006-06-10 19:38:07 · answer #5 · answered by ~Lindsey~ 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think you're fine I check out other girls all the time but more in a sense that I wanna compare myself to her like...."oh I look better than her" or "She blows me out the water!" or even to say another girl has nice hair, breasts, a$$ or legs. I know where other girls do this as well. Don't worry about it.
2006-06-10 19:39:25 · answer #6 · answered by **LeXi** 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well guess what? They will know now if they can come here. But, if you want a relationship, or thinking about it, with a girl, you have to go with where your heart tell you to go. If it tell you to go to the man side, and stay with your boyfriend, or does it tell you to go to the girl side, and get a girl friend. Two girls having a sexually relationship is ok with me, but both girls have to like each other very well. I, personally, I love to watch to girls have sex.
2006-06-10 19:44:59 · answer #7 · answered by jws3359 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I was like you. But I had dabbled with fondling at a young age. At 16 I got myself a girlfriend, had crazy sex with her, and LOVED IT! Then I had some threesomes, and that was fun too. I find that I really enjoy being with females over males now. I just LOVE the taste of a womans juices in my mouth...way better than having a mans "nut" in your mouth. Gross, like snot. lol I'm now 31 and I'm glad I tried it. You should go for it sweetie.
2006-06-10 19:37:35 · answer #8 · answered by furnace4bro 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
uhh... I dunno. You have a boyfriend. I had a stage where I thought I was bi too, but I realized I could never get emotionally attatched to another girl that way. You might just be curious or bored with guys. Doesn't matter as long as you still like guys while you're dating your boyfriend. If you stop dating, you could fool around to check.
2006-06-10 19:37:17 · answer #9 · answered by Flirty Uncommitted 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well honestly I would say it is nnot normal. God made Adam and Eve not Adam and Steve. Men are supposed to be with women and women with men but I am not going to tell you how to live your life. Sorry if i offended u
2006-06-10 19:36:55 · answer #10 · answered by rockerchick0727 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋