I had been going out with this one guy for about like three years and we loved eachother half-to- death. Now, all of a sudden its over and Im devestated! I try to act normal and like everythings all good and I try to just let go, but I cant do any of that! I need some help...anyone got some answers?
2006-06-10 11:42:49 · 14 answers · asked by urbestluver 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
WOW! I know how you feel! It's been a long time since I experienced the intense misery of real heartbreak, but we never forget these feelings....
OK, so here are my recommendations, but understand what you're now going through is one of the toughest things in life, so there's no cure-all (except, maybe, time):
1. Totally vent your feelings. I know others have suggested to completely forget/ignore everything having to do with him...but that might not be practical/possible right now. So, instead, work through your feelings by sorting through memories, scrap-booking, etc. Realize in the long term, once the worst of the hurt is over, you'll likely be grateful that you took the time to remember (and store) this meaningful relationship. Allow yourself to examine everything and spend some time on it. At first, you might look through these souvenirs and photos, etc., often, and it might really hurt. After a while, you'll look at the book/box less and less...until it's someday just a collection of fond memories.
2. Get several good movies, a blanket, kleen-ex, and comfort food. (Films like When Harry Met Sally and Sleepless in Seattle are good. Any movie which shows new relationships or independent women should help.) Also…if you like to read, I’d highly recommend “Chick” books like the Shopaholic series or Watermelon by Marian Keyes. You won’t be able to help yourself…you’ll have to laugh! Dave Barry’s Guide to Guys is good, too.
3. Call on your friends…especially the empathetic, funny ones! You need them now as they’ll need you. It’s okay if you tell them the same stories over and repeat the same complaints. If they’re real friends, they’ll understand!
4. Write…sometimes it helps to get out all your feelings and resolves some things. You can “blog”, write poetry, or even a letter to your future self. (If the relationship is really over…and only you two can know this…I would NOT write to him: unless it gives you closure or if you don’t intend to send it.)
5. Know the right guy IS out there. You just haven’t met him yet, but when you do, you’ll see this experience helped you grow into the person you needed to be for him (and MORE importantly, for you!).
6. Concentrate on all the great things you enjoy doing and focus on your positive qualities.
7. If none of that works, make a voodoo doll…and poke it a lot.
(Just kidding about that last one…though, hey, if it helps….)
In time, you really will be okay, and will get back to being yourself (probably even a better, wiser, version of yourself)! Good luck, girlfriend!
:)
2006-06-10 12:18:48 · answer #1 · answered by . 2 · 5⤊ 0⤋
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2016-05-05 15:31:51 · answer #2 · answered by Wesley 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Trying to act normal, and ignoring your feelings probably won't help you get through this. You'll have to give yourself some time to grieve, but give yourself some time to enjoy life too.
Things will likely get worse before they get better, I've personally had some good days and bad, but in time you'll hopefully get over this. Try not to dwell on the break-up, but find some closure in it.
Spend some time with good friends, or take time to enjoy the things you like to do.
Good luck.
2006-06-10 11:51:16 · answer #3 · answered by chia_vampire 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I just ended a relationship too. It wasn't as long as your at all, but it still hurt pretty bad. I still can't sleep at night. But the best thing I've done, is just keep myself busy. Try and find a hobby. Don't try to date anyone new just yet, because everyone you try to see, just won't be him, and that'll disappoint you. So just take a deep breath and count to ten, and find a hobby you could do that you can focus all your energy on. I wish you the best of luck hun. You'll make it! You know what they say, "what doesn't kill you, makes you stronger".
2006-06-10 11:47:49 · answer #4 · answered by Carrie P 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The best way to get over a guy is to get under another one.
2006-06-10 12:00:16 · answer #5 · answered by Adam Ding Dong 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Epress how you feel all the way!...like crying..getting with a new guy (don't be too committed) has always helped me get through after a break-up.
2006-06-10 11:50:30 · answer #6 · answered by Jacqueline 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Throw all of the reminders away. Find new friends and get involved in activities to clear your head.
2006-06-10 11:44:59 · answer #7 · answered by Che Che 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The best way to get over a guy is to get under a new one! ;-)
2006-06-10 11:45:27 · answer #8 · answered by Paul F 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Umm... If you guys loved each other half to death, why'd you break up?
2006-06-10 11:48:03 · answer #9 · answered by dozerina 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
burn his photos. write off every sht that comes to your mind... and send it to him, if it makes you feel better. throw out all memories of him. focus on his bad habits, on things that always annoyed you about him, things you disliked.
later, date a new guy. go and see people.
and... eat a lot of icecream... :-)
2006-06-10 11:46:17 · answer #10 · answered by Hibernating Ladybird 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋