I've been single for 3 years and recently met a really lovely guy, but as soon as he started paying attention to me like he is ringing every night, texted me 10 times today and I feel really crowded. I'm not used to men liking me for me. It sounds pathetic but I'm just used to men using me. I don't want to be used by anyone anymore so how do I get past this feeling of suffocation?
2006-06-10 11:31:14 · 15 answers · asked by ? 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Don’t think there is anything wrong with you at all, he sounds like a nice Guy and nice Guys have a tendency to be too keen. It puts a lot of people off!
Perhaps he 's also had a bit of a rough time and been used in the past and sees you as someone that wont take advantage of him?!?
Suggest that you talk to him, not patronisingly, don’t give ultimatums just be friendly and explain that you feel crowded and whilst you want him around, not all the time, at least not this early in a relationship. He's probably going to take it the wrong way at first but then you can contact him. If you do it right then you wont me sending mixed messages.
Oh, and by the way, if he runs or you feel you can’t talk to him,..... He’s probably not the guy for you!
Good luck
2006-06-12 00:00:44 · answer #1 · answered by willw8andc 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You are "used to" men using me"...sounds a tad co-dependent, but take heart, it is very fixable...but you'll have to get an understanding of this, and learn how to stop.
Read this:
http://joy2meu.com/index.html
and if you don't get enough from the website, then order Robert Burney's book. I have no affiliation to this site except that This information helped me tons.
I wish you real feel good LOVE
STW
2006-06-10 18:41:33 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I've been through that situation and still battling with it. That's why ever since she cheated on me, i will always have short relationships with other girls plus, they are all "accidental". The best way is... Try loosen up and keep in mind that you wanna have him not for the sake of marrying him! Do whatever he wants and let him give whatever he wants to u. Have fun with him. If he is of no much fun, Dump him! If you are no much fun to him, let him dump u. Remember, like is short, you gotta have some fun, girl. Don't worry bout such petty stuffs. But please do not resolve to hurting him... in some ways.
2006-06-10 18:48:20 · answer #3 · answered by kurenai_wizard 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Most of us girls are used to the guys that are the worst to us... the best thing to do is realize now that you have someone in your life that is good... don't let it go and don't let it pass you up.. you are beautiful inside and out.. and now someone is taking the time to see it!!! God did this for a reason, some how he put this person in your life to make you smile.. cheese it up girl.. he's a true gentleMAN!!!!!!
2006-06-10 18:45:28 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
try talking to him, explain how you feel and say that you do really like him, you just need to come round to the idea of being wanted for you for a change....
there is nothing wrong with you, you just need to take your time which is understandable if you have been so shoddily treated in the past, if this bloke really is lovely and is interested in YOU then he will understand when you talk to him about it
good luck chick :)
2006-06-10 18:37:52 · answer #5 · answered by sinnedfairy 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Either just throw yourself into the role and let yourself be loved or just ask this guy if he can just tone it down a bit - you're not used to all this attention. I'm sure he'll understand.
2006-06-10 18:35:30 · answer #6 · answered by Bapboy 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think the best thing to do, is make a specific time for him to ring or text you, tell him it's more exciting that way. :)
2006-06-12 05:48:37 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your thinking too much into it, u should be happy that he's ringing and texted better that him not!
2006-06-10 23:11:37 · answer #8 · answered by blondebirdcrazy 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
get to know the guy. everyone is different and if you accuse him of maybe using you because that happened to you in other relationships, he will dump you.
2006-06-10 18:37:56 · answer #9 · answered by m_rae0232 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you recently met him, how do you know he's using you? Maybe he's sincere.
2006-06-10 18:39:15 · answer #10 · answered by usctrojan 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋