Are you considered a perfectionist simply because you're careful and watchful of everything you and others do?

Question

I get insulted when others criticise me for always being "so perfect," when in reality, I watch what I'm doing, I look around corners and intersections before, during and after going through, I listen carefully to every word being said and hold my coffee cup at angle that will not spill while I bend or just talking to someone. 90% of people don't watch, so they treat me as being oblivious. I hate that!

I'm aware I'm not alone on this and I am not about to change to satisfy others' insecurities!

We can solve over 90% of "accidents" if people would just learn to watch themselves and those around them.

Being more alert, watchful and careful make some people uncomfortable, because it reminds them how careless they are, but they're not willing to take on their own responsibilities.
My brother will deliberately do something wrong and criticise me for choosing wiser actions. It's really sad!

Answer 1

^&^&^&

Take this test and make sure that you are really a perfectionist.

Perfectionism Test
44 questions, 20-25 min

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Fill in the questionnaire, responding as you truthfully would in such situations. If you have never been in one or more of the situations, respond as you most likely would. After finishing the Perfectionism Test, you will receive a detailed, personalized interpretation of your score that includes diagrams, information on the test topic and tips.

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Answer 2

I do not consider being a careful individual a perfectionist.

I have been considered a perfectionist by friends, family, counselors, doctors, and it seems slightly different than being courteous and careful.

Personally, nothing I do is ever good enough. A college degree of 4.0, honors program, dean's list, president's list.. none were even acceptable, let alone comfortable. If I were to write a paper and receive 100%, I could never be happy with the results. I would somehow expect to gain extra credit.. even though it is irrational.

In other life instances, being a perfectionist makes you quite critical of most things.... though mostly oneself. It makes work life quite difficult.. as you always "need" the promotion... the raise.. the better office, (or work environment).. it's such a strong driving force, that can sometimes consume a person.

Many people have traces of perfectionism, which can bring them to great success. Others are plagued by the inability to ever be good enough.

We can only try to find middle ground..

Answer 3

I developed the same type of care with everything in my life because I have ADHD. The OCD-type actions are typical for me because I find chaos so uncomfortable. When there is too much chaos around me, my thinking becomes chaotic as well. I do things like putting my keys in the same pocket, always scanning the area I just vacated, and so on. Rather than assuming a negative theory about this behavior, it is perfectly fine to think of all of these things you describe as being coping mechanisms that keep you happy. If it doesn't interfere with your normal living, then give those naysayer friends and/or family members a good old-fashioned raspberry (stick your tongue out and blow). The only thing wrong is that your critics feel the need to share such rude observations.

Answer 4

Isn't it strange how some people put others down for this reason or that reason saying they are not "good enough" but when someone does excel at many things, they are labeled with what is usually used in a derogatory sense as "perfectionist"? It makes no sense. I have been called that as well and it doesn't matter to me. Nobody else has to live with the consequences if I make a mistake. I am careful and I don't care if others want to be careless.

Answer 5

You sound very defensive. Did someone hurt your feelings or really anger you just before you asked the question? I don't understand the sentence about being oblivious. If you are comfortable in your own skin, that's wonderful. I am my own person. That doesn't mean that everyone else needs to accept me. When I am criticized, I really listen. Sometimes they are right and I am wrong. I know you said you listen carefully when others talk. Do you ever think that sometimes they may be right about something you don't agree with? I'm not trying to ambush you, here. I'm hoping you'll open your heart , not just your ears. Sometimes I learn my greatest lessons from my enemies. Good luck,friend.

Answer 6

You are what we call in the Fitness realm:

Kinetically Aware

This doesn't make you a perfectionist. It DOES make you a perfect candidate to be a gymnast, trapeze artist, stunt person, acrobat, and so on.

In my practice, there aren't many people who have it naturally, so others who see you using this talent will find it notable and not really "get it".

You are probably one of those people who could tumble down a stairwell and get up laughing...

So, as a walker, runner, browser in a shopping mall, driver, or whatever -- you are just more aware of your 3D universe around you and are so less likely to get into an accident than the average person.

We as trainers appreciate clients like you since you are so easy to teach. :)

Best to you!

Answer 7

Being cautious is far different from being perfectionist. Unless you do things so perfectly, i mean, like placing your shoes in a shoe rack in a specified angle, or arranging your mattress in a manner that the other side won't look like a cm longer than the opposite side, then it isn't perfectionism. You don't do those stuff, do you?? Tell her you're not trying to be perfect but cautious! (being branded a perfectionist is just not right. It's a mental disorder and we people in the medical field don't hire applicant who we find out to be a perfectionist, no matter how capable he may be to handle his job)

Answer 8

Its hard to be a perfectionist. If u are one, then good for you. I too am one but people interpret it as me being fastidious or fussy or straigh-laced and all those wonderful words that are associated with this kind of perfectionist behaviour. Sometimes this over-zealous perfectionism can casue irritation in others who like to be less than perfect. Or sometimes totally imperfect. The moment we straighten soemthing, they glare at us. They are perfect at being sloppy.

Just be yourself. thats allthat matters. But its better not to watch what or how the others are doing their stuff. Let them think they are perfect intheir own way.

Answer 9

I don't see how being cautious and aware makes you perfect.
The ones that say you sound boring, critical, angry or bitter, have
issues. You seem to me like a caretaker and want to pass on good habits to the rest of us.
Like, I'm behind you on this. If you call me on something - not looking out for photographers at an amuzement park - I would like thank you. That's not being a perfectionist. To the rest of you, like, wouldn't you make sure your kids (and yourselves) look both way before crossing the street?

Answer 10

Obsessive-Compulsive Personality Disorder