Am really close friends with a girl. At times, she calls me Hubi/Sweetie. She asked me out on a date and I said Yes. She then says that she just wants to be friends and was joking - I say OK.
Then she says she doesn't want a boyfriend ever again because shes been hurt in the past and is looking for a husband - I know that she is looking to get married [Shes always been open about this]. She askes me if I honestly like her - I say Yes. She says we should get to know each other - I say OK. A day later says she just wants to be friends because she doesn't want to get hurt again and mess up our friendship! She constantly keeps asking me if I'm OK with her or angry!
What does it mean?
2006-06-10 00:24:58 · 8 answers · asked by Bubble 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Weddings
She sounds very confused. You have let it be known that you like her and want to get to know her. She doesnt sound like she knows what she wants and is playing games with you. I think that there is a really really high chance you will be hurt if you guys become a couple.
2006-06-10 00:35:06 · answer #1 · answered by its_just_me 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Looks like she has mixed feeling and is insecure! She is scared that if she and you become more than friends and than you end up just like the other guy she was with, she will not only lose you as her bf but she will lose your friendship and that's whats bothering her! She needs to let go of her past, there is not much you Can do but be there for her! That has to come from with in her!
Seems like she wants to have a relationship with you but is really scared! Try to remind her that she can trust you, that you will not hurt her and that how good friends you guys are etc! Her trust was broken and that's one thing that take time to build!! Just be patience with her!
I wish you all the best!
2006-06-10 11:21:44 · answer #2 · answered by Pari 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think she really was hurt badly by someone before, she is afraid now and is afraid will all guys and their relationship. She is confused, hurt and helpless. Try to help her come out of this. You have to assure her that all boys in this world are not the same. You will not hurt her, but at the same time don't let her do silly silly things and take you for granted. You must be firm as well as patient with her. She is hurt and if you will hurt her again she can do anything. She might commit suicide, you must be very care full.
2006-06-10 07:37:57 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I took the time to click on your name (Bubble) and look over your history on Yahoo Answers. It was quite a revelation. It looks like you've asked this question 24 times so far. The first ten times, the scenario involved a guy. The next fourteen involved a girl.
Early in your history, someone noticed that you were simply asking the same question over and over again and complained to you about it, so you decided to ask your question in different categories. Because of your curious activity on Yahoo Answers, I'm begining to suspect you are the other person you describe in your scenarios. In other words, I'm begining to think you are an "in the closet" lesbian who is looking for someone to play a dominant role in a gay relationship with you, and you are trying to figure out what could be said to a potential lover to attract her without actually admitting you are gay (because you want to remain in the closet). If you are gay and you want to be happy, I recommend you stop playing games. If you're worried about your true sexual orientation being revealed, move to a place where gays don't worry about such things. Isn't San Francisco such a place? Be happy. Don't worry. If you don't want to move, or can't move, talk to a professional about your identity crisis. Get help, and get happy. Life is too short to waste it in a state of unhappiness.
If you are not the other person you describe in your scenarios, then, in my opinion, the other person is gay and wants you to play a (hubby) dominant role in a relationship. It's up to you to decide whether that is something you want to do.
2006-06-13 10:03:27 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Usually when people carry around extra baggage they guard their feelings and end up sending mixed messages to other people. Lets say you do get together but she behaves the same way or she drains you mentally. That is toxic and not healthy. Are you really going to be content and experience true happiness with that? It seems like she's looking for a spouse to feel "secure" but how is she going to look for a spouse if she doesn't get to know someone first?
In my opinion, people like your friend needs therapy to work things out. You can offer to pay for your friend's therapy and go with her but don't just tell her that she needs to go to therapy because it will just make her mad and resent you. If she doesn't want to get help, it's up to you whether or not it's worth it staying in this friendship.
2006-06-10 08:37:18 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Women can sometimges be crazy when they have been hurt. In her case I think she is just being silly. Its obvious that she is hurting you by toying with your emotions. If I were you I would let her know that. If not she is just going to keep driving you insane.
2006-06-10 07:34:15 · answer #6 · answered by frazier2728 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It means she's messing with your head. Don't focus on her...be her friend, if you want, and leave it at that. She sounds very unsure of herself and is just major drama waiting to happen. Look for someone else.
2006-06-10 08:12:41 · answer #7 · answered by bluez 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
BEST FRIENDS MAKE BETTER LOVERS! I MARRIED MY BEST FRIEND. 13 YEARS NOW. STILL IN LOVE AND VERY HAPPY. WOULDN'T CHANGE A THING.
2006-06-10 13:20:00 · answer #8 · answered by ASTORROSE 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋