I am in love with someone
Someone who I have never seen
Someone who holds me late at night
Someone who gently caresses me when I need it
Someone who knows that I love to be whispered to
Someone who can be gentle and manly and the same time
Someone who beliefs what I do
Someone who saved himself just for me
Someone who when he looks at me all I see is love
Someone who tells me constantly that I’m perfect
Someone who sees that I am passionately in love with him
Someone who has sparkling eyes and rugged hands
Someone who makes me laugh but lets me cry
Someone who wants children to love
Someone who sees only me in a world of women
I am in love with someone
2006-06-09 18:25:24 · 12 answers · asked by icanansweryourquestions 3 in Arts & Humanities ➔ Other - Arts & Humanities
It's actually wonderful!!don't get discouraged by what stupid people say!there were a couple o' grammatical errors, though.in line 7 , the word would be 'believes' and in line 9, the word 'he' shouldn't be there.
2006-06-09 20:20:22 · answer #1 · answered by IB 3 · 2⤊ 1⤋
It's really crappy. It's a very bad poem. Starting every line with "Someone" is not poetic- it's childish. I'm going to place a bet that you're eleven or twelve years old, based on the intellect exhibited in this poem. Have you actually read any poetry before? Do you see many poems in which every line begins with the same word?
Your poem lacks concrete images- things that the reader can see, taste, smell, feel or hear just by reading your words. That is what makes a good poem. It also has no rhythm and there is no strong narrative voice.
Basically, it is so bad that it doesn't really qualify as poetry.
2006-06-10 01:30:53 · answer #2 · answered by Jetgirly 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your poem is very good.You seem to be very creative and you should not stop writing. Writing is a good outlet for you, Don't be discouraged that some people don't like your poem, keeop up the good work. who knows what tomorrow holds for you , you may become rich and famous one day
2006-06-10 09:46:53 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
whoever answered the question before me sucks. Don't ever let anyone tell you that your poetry is bad. I write poetry and I don't care how childish I feel when writing it, and I'm 14, it all comes from feelings. I thought it was beautiful. Don't give up with your poetry!
2006-06-10 01:35:45 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
It is excellent. Although it would be more powerful if you used a name instead of "someone". Just a suggestion.
2006-06-10 01:29:29 · answer #5 · answered by frodobaggins1000 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I am Rihannas manager. I think Im a let her look at this
2006-06-10 01:29:36 · answer #6 · answered by drty_south_all_star420 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
That's a very meaningful and beautiful poem.
2006-06-10 01:29:50 · answer #7 · answered by monkey. 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Ok, I know it's me, you can insert the name Alexander in there instead of "someone".
2006-06-10 01:37:22 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sounds like you found Jesus.
2006-06-10 01:32:57 · answer #9 · answered by roadrunner 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I like it.
2006-06-10 01:35:09 · answer #10 · answered by Mr. Bodhisattva 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋