PLEASE HELP! BABY-TEEN PROBLEMS?help?

Question

Okay I'm 13 and for some odd reason I want a baby SO bad...I don't know what to do...Please help. I love kids and im REALLY good with them.

have a few baby-sitting jobs. i thought it might help but it only made it worse

Answer 1

you may love kids that is great but you do not need a child having your own child is nothing like babysitting someone elses child i promise. you cannot even take care of yourself right now much less a child on average, not including daycare, a child costs about $785 dollars a month now if you want to add in daycare you should add about $1000 a month and i do not think at 13 much less when you turn 18 you will be able to find a job that pays you a minimun of $1785 a month but that would only get you what the baby NEEDS and daycare not food for you, rent, electricity, nothing else just the needs of the child they are expensive and you should really just get the whole idea of having a child out of your head for a few years then think about it again once you are married and stable enough to take care of a child

Answer 2

I believe that you are good with kids, but no matter how good of a parent you think you might be, your age will always get in the way. You are far too young to try and handle such a responsibilty. I was 36 years old before I had my first child and it was even hard then. Can you imagine what it would be like in your situation.

Think of it this way. You love children right? And you will probably love your own more than you can imagine right now. So why give your child a life with a mom that has no life experience, no job because she's too young and a severly unstable life? Make sure you're ready not just mentally, but physically.

Have you ever concidered that maybe by fluke you have a mentally challenged child like retardation, or ADD or PDD or autism. You think that would never happen to you? Niether did I. If I didn't have my husband of 12 years by my side today, I don't think I could give my autistic child what he needs completley.

I know you're a smart girl cause you seek advise, so that tells me that you have reservations about what you're deciding. Stick to your gut feeling and wait. You mark my words you will not regret waiting. Give your baby everything she/he needs when he arrives, including a fully mature mother who has some know-how about life under her belt. I'm not saying you're dumb....I'm just saying that you still have a little foot work to go and it sounds like in no time when you marry you'll be ready. WEIGH YOUR OPTIONS and what's worse the very limited options of your unborn child if you had one now.

Answer 3

You are too young to have a baby. I think you already know that or you wouldn't have asked the question you did. It's fine to love kids, but taking care of someone elses for a bit and raising your own are sooo different. Trust me, I had my daughter when I was only 19 and that was too young. I wasn't ready financially and it has been a struggle ever since.
If you really love kids so much start babysitting. This way you can be around them and make some cash in the process.
But you sound like you are missing something in your life. Without knowing you I can't really say what that may be. Maybe you don't feel close enough to your own parents. Tell your mom or dad that you think you may need to talk to a therapist. You don't have to tell them why, just that things are tough for you right now. Or you can go to your school counselor. Good luck.

Answer 4

I understand and I know this is exactly what everyone else is saying and so cliche. But you are not mature enough. I was 19 and I had no idea what to expect. It is the hardest thing i have ever done. Your life is completely involved in your baby. No more nights out late, no more parties or clubs. Your up every 3 hours feeding rocking, changing diapers. Even if you have the best natured baby in the world, you deal with so much. And their expensive! Having a baby in the hospital is about 6,000 dollars. Nursing is cheap but formula will run you about 80-100 dollars a month, plus diapers, another 40-50 bucks. THey have to have doctor checkups every 2 months. 100 dollars or your copay. Believe me please.....this is not something you want to take on right now. You want to have fun with your friends and go whereever you want and live your life. You also want support from the man you love. A baby needs a mom and a dad and a loving structured home, not mom dating different guys and being crazy. Don't do it.

Answer 5

Ok.... hold up! You are only 13! IF you had a baby right now you would not be able to go to any high school functions. Think about it... you would miss homecoming, proms, football games all because you would have to be home with a baby. A baby is not a doll. They dont shut up when you are bored with them. Your life would never be the same with a child at 13. Plus you have not even fully grown. Your body would be in terrible shape during a pregnancy. Why would you want to do that. You might be really good with them as a baby sitter but you always return them to their parents. Can you see yourself getting up 5 times a night to feed, change, and comfort a screaming baby!? I think it would be selfish of you bringing a child into this world at the age of 13. You are not old enough and not responsible enough to do such things. Keep your mind on school and getting good grades that could lead you to college. Then in college you might meet the man of your dreams, marry him, then have a baby. So keep your legs shut and your head in those books!

Answer 6

Buy a puppy, your not ready to have a baby. The kids you watch aren't yours and you get to leave them when their parents come home. When you have a baby of your own you can kiss you life go bye, cause all your time and money goes to them you can't go out with your friends and you can't just leave them, they're with you for the rest of your life. and let me let you it's no day at the park, Babies get sick and when they are sick you can kiss a good night sleep good bye also. Cause you'll be up all night taking care of them. It's not easy to have a baby at a young age I had my son at 23 years -old and even then it was hard I had to drop out of College and get a full time job. I have know idea when I'll be able to go back to school, I don't have a social life cause I don't have anyone to watch my son. so if I were you I would really think about what you are saying. Cause having a baby changes you life forever. your only 13 you should be thinking about going to High School and getting your Diploma.

Answer 7

Kids are a not a "want or don't want" issue. A child is a great responsability. Do you think you are able to offer him what he needs? Do you think you are mature enough to make the right decisions for him when you are a child yourself. I ask myself this questions and I'm 26 (and don't have a child yet)

How about the father? Do you have a candidate for it? Do you think you are able to choose a father for you child and a men to spend the rest of your life with at this age?

How about the school. A small child is a full time job.

And there are so many reasons why this would be a wrong decision.

As a solution.... ask your parents (maybe they have planned a little brother/sister for you) or find someone who already has a small kid and they would let you to help them take care of him.

Answer 8

You may love kids and be really good with them, but you are not mature enough nor have the finicial stability to raise a child.

Your "love" of kids may change when you are constantly getting up every night in the middle of the night because the baby is crying.

Also you will be forced to drop out of school. You DEFINATLY need to finish school and college first.

If you have a love for kids, do some babysitting on the side, or look for a job in a daycare until you are old and mature enough to have your own child.

Answer 9

u can borrow my son sometime... ull change ur mind... he's a great boy, just a handful. and at 13 u r wayyyyyyy to young. im 21 and having my second. im a single parent and really scared. i wanted one too when i was 18 and when i became preg at 19 i became very scared. all the stuff i was excited about suddenly went away. knowing i had to take care of little one alone with no help. it was hard. and yet again here i go again. doing it all over again. not only is it scary but expensive. how u gonna pay for it at 13? im a security officer and can't even make ends meet some months.

Answer 10

Ok I was 15 when I got pregnant and it wasnt on purpose i was on birth control but obviously didnt work... I love my baby girl to death of course but trust me it is so hard! I thought it was some what easy at first cuz i have an extremely calm baby never cries u know just very calm baby (i am now 17 and she is 7 months) she just got her first tooth the other day and all she has done is cry for three days... It is so hard. I was also lucky cuz i had to help raise my 2 nephews for 3 years so i knew alost about babies! But anyways back to ur question.. Im not saying you cant do it but at this young it is so hard! you want to make sure that the dad of your baby is going to be there for you! You can do it if you think you have to but trust me it is good to wait a couple years. If you want to email me my addy is [e-mail] good luckk