I just turned 23. I have been married for over a year, and have been with my husband for almost 5 years. We have excellent jobs and OWN a 3 bedroom house, this is our only debt.
I have a college education and we have traveled a lot. In the past 6 months I have really wanted to start a family, I cry sometimes because I KNOW I am ready. I feel like it’s a part of my life that’s missing. I look at baby stuff in the store and feel sick, a friend got pregnant by her new boyfriend and I was so upset it was hard to be happy for her.
My husband said he was ready too and we have decided to wait until next August (when the mortgage is paid off) before we start trying to conceive. We could have one now, but we agreed on next year, so how can I get over my baby fever for another year? Its super bad. I know I am young, but honestly, I have done so much already I feel a lot older than 23, I am ready to start a family soon.
2006-06-09 08:44:10 · 14 answers · asked by Anonymous in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Pregnancy
I dont understand your reasoning for waiting until your mortage is paid off. Dont you feel financially secure without that money??? My hubby and I have 2 car payments and our mortgage, we have 2 kids and a 3rd on the way. If you both feel ready why not start trying. It can take a while to get pregnant. Its not always a wham bam thank you mam hey im pregnant. Talk to your husband and make the decision together. Tell him you don't want to wait. Start the baby making process already.
2006-06-09 08:50:53 · answer #1 · answered by Maw730 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
If the mortgage is going to be paid off next August, why not time it so the baby arrives as soon as the mortgage is paid off? You could start trying to conceive in November which would give you an August baby but there's no guarantee you'll get pregnant on the first try so it could take longer anyway. At least if you could start trying in November, that's only 5 months away instead of a whole year.
Now, maybe the issue is that HE's not ready. That was the case with my husband and we were both much older. I have to say that he said he didn't want any children. I just couldn't go without having any so, I was not exactly careful about precautions (he could have taken some of his own if he was THAT concerned about it) and voila, we got pregnant.
He said he wasn't sure about the whole pregnancy thing and he didn't think he was ready. I told him, "Well, you have 9 months, GET ready." Now, he is the happiest Dad there is and is very happy we have a child.
2006-06-09 19:01:02 · answer #2 · answered by CleverGal 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
well congrats on having so much so soon. It sounds like whenever baby comes you guys will be ready for it. If you want a baby sooner talk to your husband, he may be thinking the same thing. If all you have is a mortgage, you are already a step ahead of most familys, and probably won't endanger your finances by having a baby. If he agrees, go off birth control now, depending on what kind you use, it may take a while for the drugs to wear off. Not all people get pregnant at the drop of a hat. Then, just let nature run its course, if you get pregnant now, you still won't actually have the baby till March.... If your husband really isnt ready then start getting your body ready, change your diet and start exercising, even take prenatal pills, so when you are ready it will be easier for you to concieve and carry a child.
2006-06-09 15:52:38 · answer #3 · answered by manderstwin1 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
A lot of people take over a year to concive espcially if you have been on birth control. Not to mention if you do end up pregnant the first night you try you will have 9 months before the baby is there. Paying off your mortgage is not going to stop you from being able to buy baby clothes and diapers and anything else you child will need or even want. Millions of families do it everyday. I don't think that you need to get over your baby fever it sounds like he needs to get over whatever fears he has. I can tell you know that you aren't the one with the problem, you need to sit down and talk to him. Find out exactly what problem he has with having a baby now because it doesn't seem to be bills. Don't put yourself and baby on the back burner. Talk to him.
2006-06-09 15:54:34 · answer #4 · answered by 20mommy05 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I don't know, but I think they should have support groups for this! Seriously.
Maybe you and your husband should talk about conceiving earlier, and having the baby next August. Remember, on average, it takes a woman 8 months to conceive after she starts 'trying'.
Talk to your husband and see if you can start collecting things for the little one now. Like a high-chair, getting the nursery ready. These are things you won't have to do then, when you do get pregnant.
2006-06-09 15:51:44 · answer #5 · answered by rockchick13 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Get a puppy or kitten! I had the same problem a few years ago (before my hubby and I decided to have another baby), and I got a puppy, and felt a lot better! (SERIOUSLY!, I know it might sound stupid, but it really worked for me!) Just keep telling yourself, you only have to wait one more year!! (Maybe wait 6 months,then start trying...you are pregnant for 9 mos...by the time your baby is born, your house will be paid off! If you get a puppy, your baby will have a cool pet to grow up with too!(just make sure it is a dog that will be good with kids...lab, or german shepard's are awesome with kids!) Good luck!
2006-06-09 16:53:42 · answer #6 · answered by momx4 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
First off I was 16 when I had my baby so 23 isnt too young... my advice is to babysit friends kids.... that way you can do the mothering thing (part-time) till next year... Good LUck
2006-06-09 17:27:44 · answer #7 · answered by kayla_ann_simmons 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Maybe you can compromise and start trying in November of this year. That way the baby won't be born until August....
2006-06-09 22:39:29 · answer #8 · answered by sdc_99 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
keep your self busy find a hobby that you enjoy I have to do the same I am on fertility drugs and have been trying to get pregnant for a year so I get sad and cry because all of my friends had no trouble getting pregnant and they arent even married so i have found myself a hobby I work on my garden to keep myself from getting upset good luck and dont let it get you to down
2006-06-09 15:52:05 · answer #9 · answered by COLLEEN 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your friend! Be there for her. If you see an outfit that you like, buy it. Go to the Dr.'s with her, share her joy! Spoil that baby rotten. Then in a year your turn. She'll be there for you and you'll be in the clouds!
2006-06-09 15:49:46 · answer #10 · answered by lil_gabby_2003 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋