I want to apologize to you guys.?

Question

I guess I have been kinda rude to the gays in the world.
But I have a serious guestion now.
What is with the term homophobic?
Does this mean you think I am realy afraid of homosexuals or does it mean I am afraid of what I don't understand.
Once again I truly apologize for my previous rude and hateful statements. I am really trying to understand now.

Thanks to all who answered so far. I am grateful for your forgiveness.
Let me assure everyone my apology is sincere.
I am truly sorry and what to gain understanding

Answer 1

First of all, thanks for your apology. That takes a lot of guts.

As for "homophobic", I'm not sure exactly what it refers to, but I think it's way overused in the gay community. I've concluded that "antigay" and "homophobic" are not the same, but are often intertwined. I would consider my family as antigay because they disapprove of homosexuality for various reasons, but they're not homophobic as in being afraid of or hating gays.

Answer 2

The definition of a homophobe is the fear of homosexuals (gays)
And yes, a lot of people fear the unknown. It's very common for us to judge rather than want to gain knowledge on certain subjects. It's called ignorance. You are willing to learn though so good for you being open-minded. There should be more people like yourself in this world.

Answer 3

homophobic: noun

Fear of or contempt for lesbians and gay men.
Behavior based on such a feeling.

Thats the exact definition on a couple sites.

To break it down even further...

homo:
Same; like: homophone.

Phobia:
A persistent, abnormal, and irrational fear of a specific thing or situation that compels one to avoid it, despite the awareness and reassurance that it is not dangerous.
A strong fear, dislike, or aversion.

So, to sum it up, I think it is used to say a person fears, dislikes or avoids homosexuals. The dislike and avoidance may be from internal fears of being homosexual. Or irrational fears that they will contract a disease. Or that homosexuals will molest their children. Irrational fears that have been proven to be untrue etc.

Answer 4

Well, I don't know what your previous questions or comments were. But your apology is very touching. (no, I'm not gay) But I believe we are all the same spirit. What you do to others, you ultimately are just doing to yourself.

Phobic means a fear. Homo - well I think that means the genus of humans. So the word doesn't really make sense. Well, or maybe in a way it does. You are afraid of people? They are just people, like you and me.

You wouldn't want to be judged on who you were in love with, and it is no one's business what you do in the bedroom.

Answer 5

Hey, if you are sincere ??, then Answers may have had one real accomplishment! Hooray!
Gays and straights get along just fine, no real difference except who they sleep/play with...they both have the same problems in life. Being Non-phobic does not mean being gay...sort of a sad misconception with people. Phobias are unreasonable dislikes of something or others...and hating gays is unreasonable by any standard. Good luck

Answer 6

You are what we call a recovering homophobe. Any of us will answer any questions you have about anything gay as long as you really want to know the answer. I dont think you were actually scared of gay people, you just didnt know about our business and fear is based off of the unknown. I think the term for someone who is not scared but still hates people is a bigot. Be glad you are neither of those anymore. You have hundreds of allies in the gay community and we are glad to have you as one of ours. B)

Answer 7

Gay people aren't really bad people. Have you ever heard the saying "IT TAKES ALL KINDS TO MAKE THIS WORLD". Sometimes people are also Homophobic because they are gay themselves and they are afraid to come out of the closet, because they have lived their lives a lie for so long they are afraid of what people will say. If people won't be your friend anymore after you tell them you are gay, then they were never a friend to begin with. Thanks for the apology.

Answer 8

Some think that the word phobia just means fear. Phobia is a greek word and with any translation, there are nuances of meaning that sometimes get lost.

Part of a phobia is a strong desire to avoid the object of the phobia. The people you see in this site who say things like "why should I have to see gay people making out/on tv/as elected officials/flaunting in my face/on bumper stickers/having pride parades" are homophobic. A person who is not homophobic would say something like "I'm not gay and I don't want to go to a pride parade, but if they want to have one, go right ahead because I don't care". A person who is homophobic is freaking out the idea that gay people might congregate that that person might have to deal with that in thier life or even as a abstract concept that gays exist somewhere.

Another element of the word phobia is the anxiety. This is what you see in the "oh god, think of the children!" homophobes. We can have scientific studies til the cows come home showing that gay people raise their children as well as straight people, but these people are still going to be anxious because of a low level jittery fear that someday, somehow, something will be bad. This is that fear of what one doesn't understand... and its based on the idea that gays are SO different that they cannot be understood to be the same as me, they must be something different and different is scary.

Logic doesn't enter into it and this is where you can also get the "I have no idea what I'm talking about" homophobe. THis is someone who starts talking about gays molesting children or having public sex or leading to beastiality (like the senator that said gay marriage would lead to men having sex with box turtles - seriously). These people are so anxious and so nervous that they get defensive and say the weirdest damn stuff. The numbers of gays who molest children, have public sex, and f*ck turtles are so small that it is completely irrelevent... but people still talk about it like it has something to do with what is going on.

Another element is the "a gay person was once mean to me" phobia. This is a very very important point: No single gay person speaks for all of us. None. Not even the bigwigs at our gay rights groups, not the leaders of our pride events, not our comics and entertainers or pundits. No one. A gay guy with a pride sticker might cut your off on the freeway. Your gay coworker might be pushy and hit on you. Your lesbian neighbor might be a raging b*tch. But when you're so quick to say "I hate all gay people or all gay people are annoying/bad because one or two were mean to me", that is just a thin veil on your homophobia. No group deserves to be hated and discriminated against because some of its members are a$$holes.

Ultimately, weather or not you're a homophobe depends on how much you give a **** about what the gay community is up to. I don't need every straight person to love and accept me, honestly I would settle for them not trying to dog me all the time. If you're going to forums posting about how much you hate gays, then you're a phobe because you're going out of your way to bug US. If you're one of those people on the news campaigning against same sex marriage because you're afraid that the earth will spin backwards and the skies will turn orange dispite the fact that I've done nothing to you, then you're a phobe.

If you're minding your business and you let me mind mine, then you're not.

And thanks for the apology. I really appreciate it. It's not often that you see people of any stripe or situation admit their mistakes (and lord knows I've made enough). That is really awesome of you. Good luck and I hope you find what you're looking for here.

Answer 9

A good person doen't define himself by what "a bad man" is or does. The fact that the next person and their misadventures is even and issue is showing that you have an issue. Satisfaction comes from obeying your true conscience - not from focus on others. Observe the type who sit up at night and dream about their enemies in hell. How much inner peace do they appear to have to you?

Answer 10

Do you mean it??

Homophobic means those that have a phobia with gay and Lesbians.

If you are here to learn read some articles and stop harassing comments

http://www.soulforce.org/article/homosexuality-bible-gay-christian
http://godmademegay.com

Also for all those that want to sit around and Judge: READ

Answer 11

I think it leans more toward "afraid of what you don't understand." Which is what everybody is afraid of, isn't it. So cheer up, you're not so very different after all.

I'm not gay; but your apology strikes me as sincere and very mature. Good for you. What does the book of Proverbs say? "With all thy getting, get understanding." So go get 'em!