I was planning to get a divorce. I came home and my wife was gone. I slept alone thinking about her. I asked her to come back, but she did not. After she cleared my bank account, she wanted back, but I divorced her.
Now, I still have bad feeling toward her. I do not hate her, but I do not want to be with her. She tried and I refused. She lost my trust and I do not want to see her. Yes, I still miss her, but I am sure I do not want to be with her.
2006-06-09 05:56:17 · 17 answers · asked by Sam 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Well, you divorced her, so you ARE no longer with her. You will miss her for a while.
Try working on yourself for a while. Persue some hobbies, relax, do whatever you feel. Soon enough you will feel refreshed and will no longer miss her.
2006-06-09 06:28:36 · answer #1 · answered by grudgrime 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
The emotional effects of divorce have been well documented. There is the obvious heartache and loss, followed by loneliness, sadness and anger. But divorce has the capacity to break more than just hearts.
Yes, there have been records of people divorcing only to get back together again years down the road.
This maybe the best thing, give both of you some time out… a cooling off period if you will. Obviously your first marriage didn’t work out. As you said, maybe down the road when you both have had some more life experience under the belt, your second marriages, whether together or with other people, maybe the second marriages will work better. We all pray for that second chance at “Happily ever after”, some of us get that sooner then others.
Be aware that there isn’t only “One” person for each of us. There isn’t just “One” chance at happiness. Are you happy now? no, then obviously you haven't found that person yet. Happiness is where you make it, where you look for & find it. It also depends on if you’re willing to look for it again & give love another shot, risking the pain & hurt again.
2006-06-09 16:42:01 · answer #2 · answered by Maya 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
trust is a big issue in a relationship and once you have lost the trust it is pretty much over AM sure with time it well get better can not take her back knowing she could do this again to you she sounds like maybe she is not sure what she wants AM so sorry about the pain you are feeling i know it is awfully felling to miss someone you don't trust you almost hate yourself for missing them becausee want to be mad but you cant becaus you still love them. i hope with time you well find peace and happiness wishing you well.
2006-06-09 13:05:07 · answer #3 · answered by wendy a 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Work on your feelings here and seek counseling and help for this and sort out your feelings and see what you come up with. Maybe your wife will be open to marriage counseling and help as well. I guess what i am saying is if there is help and hope for this marriage then try to save it if at all. If she is truley sorry she will have to understand where you are coming from and give you time but at the same time someday you will have to find it in your heart somewhere to forgive her!
2006-06-09 13:01:41 · answer #4 · answered by Fast Steve 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Try some divorce support groups, many communities and churches have them free of charge. It's a good opportunity to vent and share experiences and thoughts with people that have been in the same situation as yours. And it will do you some good to socialize and meet new people anyway.
Good luck to you, You make perfect sense to me. Good decision, it;s time to let go and move on...if you continue holding on you will keep on being angry and lonely.
LET GO
2006-06-09 13:04:08 · answer #5 · answered by Blunt 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your feelings are right on track. It's alright to miss her but your very mature to know that you have to do what is right for you and move on without her.
Try your best to cut off contact with her, if you have children arrange for a phone number that is just theirs so you don't have to talk to her when you want to talk to them.
Arrange pick ups and drop offs at public places where you don't have to deal with her.
You are doing the right things to get over her.
I wish you the best.
2006-06-09 13:06:11 · answer #6 · answered by yeller 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Trust me time heals. My ex stoled my identity and ran up $5000 in debt. I had to file bankruptcy. It has been 2 years now and I am getting better. I know exactly how you feel. If you ever need to talk just email me.
2006-06-09 13:02:17 · answer #7 · answered by chellebeth75 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Time heals. That may be hard to understand now, but it truly just takes time.
Also remember that carrying around anger does not help anyone and it's not good for you.
Your mind is like a TV...if you don't like what's showing, change the channel.
2006-06-09 12:59:55 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sounds like a mess. Time does not heal, seek counseling for your anger, if you don't you will just repress it and it will come out again later on in life w/ another person or something, anger doesn't just disappear, GL!
2006-06-09 13:50:30 · answer #9 · answered by dixi 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You sound very honorable. You have every right to be angry with her.
2006-06-09 13:05:44 · answer #10 · answered by ♥§weetiepie♥ 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋