what is your definition of love....do you even believe in it?

Question

my heart is black and sick from hurt and pain
tell me how u can love when the word makes me
sick

10 POINTS TO THE FIRS ANSWER

Answer 1

This is love: to fly toward a secret sky,

to cause a hundred veils to fall each moment.

First, to let go of live.

In the end, to take a step without feet;

to regard this world as invisible,

and to disregard what appears to be the self.



Heart, I said, what a gift it has been

to enter this circle of lovers,

to see beyond seeing itself,

to reach and feel within the breast.

Answer 2

Love is caring. The more you care, the more intimate the relationship. You say your heart is black and sick from hurt and pain, that is love so powerful you forget what started your pain. You cared and opened yourself up for the experience. You want to get over the pain then stop hating love then do so. Maybe you need a new target for your affections. Maybe you need to examine your other relationships to see why they are working. A friendship is love. A sibling is love. A parent is love. There are many degrees of love. Look into honesty and trust and see if that helps. Relatonships need love, honesty, and trust to grow strong. If one weakens then the other two have to pick up the slack in the relationship. Perhaps, you don't trust who it is you love. Perhaps, there is some disonesty in your relationship. In the mean while focus your attention on watever makes you happy. You have a life time to love.

Answer 3

Love is being understanding of others.
Love is being patient.
Love is accepting others as they are, and who they are.
Love is wanting the best for everyone, not just yourself.
Love is paying attention in detail to nature, feeling the wind blow on your face, listening to the chirping bird, seeing the clouds move along, and smelling the roses.
Love is knowing faithfully that tomorrow will be better than today.
Love is giving a helping hand when needed by anyone at any time.
Love is smiling at someone who might of had a bad day until the moment you took the time to smile at them.
Love is finding the possitive in every negative.
Love is life.

Love is many things, and it surrounds YOU ! just take a minute to hear it, smell it, touch it, speak it,taste it.

Your heart is as black and sick as YOU allow it to be, if this is because someone has hurt you, then you are allowing that person to rule you. You be your own boss and you chose what you feel and when. Have you heard that saying : He who angers you controls you. ..... Do yourself a favor and take charge of your life , you control it.

Answer 4

Yes ... love in unconditional and involves being willing to put that person's need before your own. True love is not convenient, and sometimes the people you love the most have the ability to cause you the greatest amount of pain.

I understand the paradox here. My mother beat me incessantly when I was growing up, and I never knew what I did wrong. She would then tell me 10 minutes later "I love you". What kind of message did that send? That love = pain, and vice-versa. For years I could only get attached to people who were emotional wrecks ... they needed me but were incapable of loving anyone, including themselves. The inability to feel or give love often stems from deep self-loathing and terribly low self-esteem.

You were hurt very young, and you've been hurt often. Learn from these experiences and in time maybe you can let the anger go. The abililty to adjust your perspective is critical to your survival.

Answer 5

Chuck W's quoting that intimacy, passion and commitment comprise love is a good, solid definition. I also believe the romanticized thoughts expressed in the others' responses are every bit as valid.

I DEFINITELY believe in love.

I would add and encourage you to accept your pain and struggle through it. Please do not succumb to any urge to turn bitter or hate. You may wrestle with this pain for some time but endeavor to get through it.

The other side will truly usher a new day and you will be reborn and be all the better for it.

How else, then, will you be more ready to recognize love if you don't experience and resolve what it isn't?

Answer 6

Guard your heart at all times. I mean that. If you are loose with your heart you will get hurt like you are right now,

Anybody can talk the words so don't ever trust the words. Trust only the walk the person has for themselves. Trust what their friends say about them. But never accept what a person says to you about themselves. It is just talk. So, take your time to really check someone out and see what others say about them.

Answer 7

Love is personal to each and every individual..and can be very different too. I believe Love is how something makes you feel, whether it be a person,place, or thing. If a man loves me...it is because he makes me feel that way. It is not because he says the word to me...it is his actions... As for your hurt and pain...would anyone of us ever appreciate the great without having experienced the worst? To gain the greatest gifts in life, we must also have our losses...

Answer 8

Yes I do believe in love. I have known unconditional love from my husband for 37 years. I feel very blessed. My first marriage which I thought was love was also a nightmare so I can compare. Unfortumately my children want to find the same kind of relationship they saw in their father and so far they have not found it.

Answer 9

To Herself from Himself. God is love! Everything else is a human relationship. If you can acknowledge Gods love in your life then you are free to share that. If not, you are on your own. Love can only be expressed from the heart. No God, no love. A broken heart is a sign of too many expectations from another. Learn about love from God, share it, and you will know when you are truely being loved.

Answer 10

Romantic Love?
Sisterly and Brotherly Love?
What dost thou mean poor soul?

To love another more than oneself
Tis but a fool's adventure

Thou must love thyself first
and most
in this way you are full

and do not seek
the energy of another
to be one with
LIFE

and so we see that
those in pain
must wander in
lonliness

until one day
they comprehend
this sad
truth

LOVE
begins in thy own heart
and then springs
forth to others

Love that causes pain
is not love but
DESIRE and
NEED

When you can fill
your own heart
you will be'
free to love
free from
darkness and
pain

Peace and Love Stranger

Ouros

Answer 11

I'm sorry to hear that man, but let me let you in on a little secret....EVERYONE has a little black on their heart from the pain love can cause, and personally, I know a few people with that blackness from past loves, who are in very happy relationships right now.

And from everything that might be said in your answers, BELIEVE this: It is selfish not to love because you've been hurt before; it's selfish and it's rediculous. Why would you want to deny good people your trust based on what a few bad people have done to your poor heart? Love as if you've never been hurt before, and believe me, you'll find happiness, and the anger and pain from long ago will vanish as each little bit of someone else's love fills you, AND MORE IMPORTANTLY, it will vanish even more quickly as each little bit of yourself is given to that other person.

So, YES, I believe in love... I believe it exists, I believe in the truth that it exists, and I believe in the relationship of giving/receiving love... my definition? simple... love=unconditional, period.

You know what I think, I think if you didn't believe in love, you wouldn't care enough to ask this question. You would long ago have locked your charcoaled heart away from the people in this world and thrown away the key. I think you are still looking for someone to change your mind on the matter of love, that way, when you get hurt again, it won't be your fault because you were coersed into loving again by someone's anonomous answer on yahoo! answers, and you will then have someone else to blame for your pain. (hopefully that doesn't happen, and hopefully you do believe in love once more, and find happiness).

And another thing, I think that when people are hurt as you appear to have been (to the point where the use of the word makes you sick), and from that hurt decide they no longer believe in love, well, that isn't good for anyone, especially yourself... for we must love all, and if you decide to not love in relationships, that denial will seep into your love for others as well; it will impede your ability to love, and you will become a scroodge! When people say they don't believe in love because they've been hurt, that means they can't love their family, children, friends, strangers, etc. and soon will no longer love themselves....not a good situation my friend, not at all...

Don't give up on love; go out, get smashed with some friends, let your pain rise up and then delete it with each shot of Jack Daniels or sip of Budweiser. And with that pain deleted, there will be plenty of room for forgiveness, and then plenty of happiness for forgetting it and moving on. OR, if you're not a drinker, sit down with a box of tissues and a good WE / Lifetime channel romance movie about someone in the same situation as you...let the pain rise with each tear you cry, then be deleted with each swipe of the tissue, and continue on as in example A ;-)

(short version - don't give up on fishing just because you caught a puny croppy that pissed on your lap while it's gill sliced your hand! S h i t, that happened to me ten days ago, and yesterday I caught a beautfil blue gill! I love fishing too much to give it up just because of one bad, smelly, bloody experience... keep tossing that line out man, or one day, when you're 80 years old, bed ridden and wishing you could fish, you'll regret the time you wasted when you could have, but didn't.

peace.