When I met my fiance, she was very, very pretty. She still is to me. We just had our first child in January, and my poor fiance gained 70 lbs. She has had a very hard time losing the weight and has since become very self-conscious. She won't let me see her naked anymore, she puts herself down constantly, and when I give her compliments on how she looks, she doesn't believe me.
How do I handle her? How can I make her feel better about herself and actually make her believe that I love her still?
2006-06-09 03:47:55 · 14 answers · asked by Righteous1 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
Sorry about your problem.............
Find something that you know she will like(small gift), give it to her, and let her know how you feel. It's 2006 now, and men & women roles are no longer defined. It's how we act toward another and how (we make them feel and they make us feel) Call her (on the phone, if you're at work,or text) and let her know that you love her, regardless of her size, looks, Start taking walks together, Have a surprise romantic (healthy) dinner, with candles,etc.........
As far as the weight-gain........Create a better (eating habit/lifestyle) plan for the two of you:
I was in a situation like your fiance........maybe she can do what I did:
The weight came off fast!!!!!!!!!!!!
I lost 100 lbs in 6-7 months, drinking a gallon of water a day, exercising 2 hours daily - Some form of low-impact exercise(aerobic exercise- using the stepper, running up & downstairs, jogging), and eating ramen noodles & salads, and taking a multi-vitamin pill................I've kept the weight off for 6 years now...........Good Luck!
2006-06-09 04:09:00 · answer #1 · answered by Ms. Spongebob 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Just keep saying it. Be there for her all the time and don't let her catch you watching the hotties....LOL! Seriously, though, take the baby for a walk in the stroller with her and make it a daily thing. This gets her outside, exorcising, and gets the juices flowing in her brain. Eventually she will lose the weight and feel better. It takes time.
Oh, and don't mention any weight loss books, videos, diets, etc. as that will only aggravate her.
2006-06-09 03:52:24 · answer #2 · answered by T2Step 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Bring her a rose(s), nice home made candle lit dinner, run her a bath, take a bath with her (or a shower), rose petals on the bed, buy her a nice piece of lingerie and have her wear it for you on the special evening, make love to her, and after-wards hold her in your arms; kiss her cheek, tell her how much you love her and how much she means to you, don't mention the weight, just tell her how amazing she is, how beautiful or gorgeous, or sexy. Women like when you say sexy. Make her feel on top of the world. Never be afraid to say I love you or you're beautiful enough. If you boost her self-esteem enough she will eventually understand. Beauty is in the eye of the beholder.
2006-06-09 03:53:32 · answer #3 · answered by ♡LiL♥Kitten♡ 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Don't discuss weight with women, no matter the reason. Change your lifestyle of eating and exercise. Do this everyday. She will catch on and want to probably join you. Don't make a big deal of this issue in front of her even if it is to you. Just play it cool and she should turn around. Good Luck
2006-06-09 03:52:40 · answer #4 · answered by Snuffy Smith 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Best thing is not concentrate on her weight like she does and assure her in loving her you have no concern about her size.
If all you do is talk and look at her size she is going to feel worse but don't ignore it either. Give her positives like maybe suggest to her if she is so worried to go on sensible and professionally medically approved diets but not hunger diets!
Go and get prefessional guidance or support groups that her doctor maybe able to offer.
2006-06-09 03:55:11 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Attempt to continually encourage her. Many women have difficulties losing weight gain from child birth. In as much; reflect on your future wedding vows: "For richer or poorer; In sickness and health". Let her know that you appreciate her even if she doesn't share your views about her physical appearance.
2006-06-09 03:54:26 · answer #6 · answered by Swordfish 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
tell her you think she is beautiful no matter what she looks like. ut maybe offer to work out with her you know be a team to help her lose the weight, try to eat only healthy things around her so you dont tempt her with fatty foods. just try to go at it as a team and hopefully it will motivate her.
and if you decide to do this when you ask her to work out with you try to say it in a way that isnt offending.
~~~~Good Luck!!~~~~
2006-06-09 03:55:42 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
She needs to be proactive and lose the friggen weight. Iceberg Slim did 11 months in the slammer and lost 40 pounds the first month. This "her hiding/you complimenting" crapola can last decades. It gets old after about two weeks. She needs to either get nude and frollick or lose the weight, get nude and frollick. The point is get nude and stay nude.
2006-06-09 03:54:08 · answer #8 · answered by Sweet Polly Purebred 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you are a good person.
you are also very patient, if she is moaning but not eating correctly or exercising then she can't expect to lose the weight. Go to a dietician and gym together...
2006-06-09 03:51:18 · answer #9 · answered by tay_jen1 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
tell her that you love her, and ask her what you can do to help her feel better about herself. tell her you love her just the way she is, but that you understand if she is not happy with herself.
offer to do what ever it takes for her to be happy again - including dieting with her - going to the gym with her - or arranging day care so she can go to the gym alone.
2006-06-09 03:51:17 · answer #10 · answered by Shopaholic Chick 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋