We have a good marriage, but he works alot and I'm alone alot. I started something dumb online and now that its over I don't feel as much in love with my hubby. How can I feel the way I used to? You know how when something is new it is all full of excitement and then after you get comfortable together there isn't that spark anymore, how can I get that spark back?
2006-06-09 02:03:24 · 15 answers · asked by colorist 6 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Plant Unconditional Honesty and All That is Needed for True Love Grows.
You stopped doing the on-line thing because you knew it was not honest. But it did show you that you feel you are missing something.
Do not be afraid to gently explore those feelings, but start being honest with him as you do this. Allow him time to grasp what it is you are feeling. Be patient and understanding of his confusion.
Your love for each is hopefully strong enough to learn and build on this. Then the renewed trust and deeper respect for each other will cause that spark to sparkle bright again.
You have to keep the honesty in your love above all else. True actions, guided by the heart, will result in what is best.
Good Luck.
2006-06-10 12:55:08 · answer #1 · answered by hyperactivesleep 3 · 9⤊ 2⤋
You blew it. Now it's YOUR job to get the excitement back.
Fisrt of all, stop taking for granted your relationship. You don't find good men nowadays. When you lose him, you'll see that there is no such thing as "harmless flirting" or "unregrettable affairs".
Are you home alone a lot? What about geting a J>O>B.! You are just craving attention.... yeah...the poor man that you call husband is outthere making a living for YOU while you whine about not having a spark..honey, let me tell you, there are plenty of unemployed freaks in the internet that will give you all that attention that you need, and they will tell you how beautiful you are and bla bla bla...but they will NOT pay YOUR bills, mortgage, car note! Wake up and smell the coffee! You are addicted to attention, but dear, is not all about YOU, is also about the rekationship with that poor man that you call husband.
Want a spark? What about stop cheating and taking him for granted. When you lose him, the spark will be back, when there will be no apologies sincere enough for him to take you back.
Get smart and stop playing with fire. You are only hurting yourself and your marriage... Disconnect the internet and find something better to do with your time.
2006-06-09 02:19:18 · answer #2 · answered by Blunt 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Igniting the spark within you could very well rub off on him. Imagine how he feels and that the same thing is going through his mind. Act as if he's about to walk out on you and in your heart you really don't want that to happen. Romance him and encourage him to do the same with you. Say and do things you've never said to him and wouldn't normally do. Remember what got you hooked in the first place, and write a letter to him. Leave it for him to find or hand it to him on his way out. It will have him going until he sees you again. Just use your imagination - if you like it - he'll love it
2006-06-09 02:23:51 · answer #3 · answered by Myra J 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
How about saying...
Man, I am so lonely for you. My life seems so dull and empty. Honey do you feel that way too? What do you think we could do to make things as intense and exciting as they used to be?
It's called communicating the problem to the source...or at least what you feel to be the source. You might be surprised at the response.
Cheating only tells you one side, there is excitement out there. It wears off just like everything else and you have to keep inventing ways to make it all new again. If you love him, and I guess you do, because you posted this, find those ways...you have the time, utilize it.
2006-06-09 02:20:53 · answer #4 · answered by peskygnats 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Why are you alone so much? Try to do things with him when he gets home and spend time with just him doing things together that he and you like to do. I know you must be really bored but find something fun to do. I am ehre if you need a friend to talk to and call your husband alot and even have phone sex with him this would be great fun for the both of you and erotic too. Spice things up in and out of the bedroom. Dress sexy for him. Do exciting and new things together with him and have fun with it!
2006-06-09 02:16:39 · answer #5 · answered by Lady Hewitt 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
We never stop growing and are forever changing, making it that much more important for couples to share their deepest thoughts, fears, and needs with each other on a regular basis. Those couples who work to build intimacy find their relationships much more loving and rewarding, and as such, enables them to better deal with the occasional problem or issue that comes along in all relationships.
If you feel your relationship lacks intimacy or you're looking for a bit of a tune-up, plan an evening alone, put on some soft music, cuddle up
2006-06-09 02:13:39 · answer #6 · answered by captures_sunsets 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
we both sail on the same boat. my hubby too works a lot of time and comes home very late. but the thrill and enjoyment is when u prepare the dinner for him and waith for his arrival. also try some romantic foreplays by getting him into the mood . he would love it when u start loving him. dont worry. u have still not lost the love for him, that is why u have asked this question. try to bring the love that is at the back of your heart to the forefront. try some foreplay and role plays with him to get him releved from his office stress. infact i handle the same method i am telling you right now and we both have a real nice time when it comes to bed. so dont loose heart and try this. u will definitely succeed.
2006-06-09 02:11:12 · answer #7 · answered by sweety pie 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Start doing little things for him, wait for him when he comes home, actually sound excited. Maybe he feels the same way. Don't ask him, men aren't always talkers. Just start acting the way you did when you fell in love with him. You will remember, it will come back.
2006-06-10 09:16:42 · answer #8 · answered by peppermint_paddy 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Invite a girlfriend over and have a 3sum. When you can physically see your girlfriend enjoying your husband, it will make you aware of what you have. You now take him for granted. Seeing another woman make love to him, will excite you, and make you want him more.
2006-06-09 02:06:51 · answer #9 · answered by R.Longo L 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Why'd you get married in the first place?? Until death do you part remember?? See a friggin marriage counselor.
2006-06-09 02:06:02 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋