Potty Training a 3 1/2 yr old?

Question

My son is 3 1/2 years old and won't use the potty. He goes to a day care and sometime's he will go there. But, whenever he is at home he wont' go. I have royal potty that make's music, but that don't work. I have one for the toliet and that don't work. He is so bad, that we i will change him in the mornig before we leave and ask him if need's to use it and put's him on it and by the time I get 5 minute's up the road to day care, he has done pooped. He changes his pull-ups every time he pee's in it, but he won't use the potty. I'll keep him naked on the weekends, nope, he will pee on the floor. Please help me. I am pulling my hair out.

Answer 1

I've always heard that potty training a boy is harder than a girl.

Can his daddy show him what to do? Maybe if he sees his dad or father figure do it, he'll want to do it too.

He also realizes that he can change his pull-up whenever he needs to, so why bother with the potty. I would take the pull ups away and let him wear regular underwear, and don't let him change it when he has an accident. This worked for my daughter, although I should tell you that you must be very patient, as he will have accidents around the house and in the car seat (I washed my daughter's car seat every night for about a week). Whenever he has an accident, tell him that it happened cause he didn't use to potty and don't get upset, just explain that that's why he needs to go potty, so he doesn't ruin his clothes and dirties the car seat.

Answer 2

Sorry- I have read some of the ideas- potty for thirty minutes, taking his pull-ups away, having daddy show him, blah blah blah blah blah- I heard all of those when potty training my son, even had suggested I put his lil potty into the room he plays in the most and take his underwear off- HA!

My only advice to you- is quit taking all of the advice with the tips and tricks- truth is- boys are very into being lazy and not going to the potty because they have other things to do. I tried once my son hit three, thinking I could just order him to potty- take his diapers away- and force him to sit there- RIGHT! Perfect world maybe, truth is, he will potty train when he feels like it. Right now he is getting all sorts of attention and loving it- I finally quit trying, and would just ask him every so often- after a month the kid was fully potty trained.

Don't rush it, and don't feel pressured by other people to potty train him- boys are slow starters at actually wanting to use it. Once he does, throw some cheerios in there and have him do some fun target practice : ) Hope this helps, just relax- the more of a fuss you make- the more he will resist. As I say with my son- he is one of those that when you say 'don't burn the house down' he looks and says.. "burn the house down" They do the opposite in fun and just make it an attention game : )

Answer 3

Whatever you do, do not make going to the potty a bad experience or punishment for your child. Sitting a child for thirty minutes on a potty is torture and will regress a child faster than you can say poo.

Schedule him. In the morning set him on the potty for 5 to 10 minutes. If he goes, have a party! Buy party favors and have a parade through the house! make a BIG DEAL of it then let him try again in 30 to 45 minutes repeat the same routine. If he doesn't, then pull his underwear up (NO PULL UPS OR DIAPERS) and let him try again every 10 minutes until he's ready to go. Good luck and don't feel like a failure most boys take a while to potty train. You're boy is as typical as the rest and will potty train when he's ready.

Answer 4

I decided right before my son turned 3 that I was done with diapers. I told him that he was going to be a big boy and have to start wearing big boy undies. He decided he did not want to be a big boy! :) I made him wear big boy undies and when he made a mess in them, he had to wear them for 15 minutes. He eventually decided that he didn't like the feel of messy pants and started using the potty. This took less than a week. HOWEVER-- I was a stay at home mom at the time and had the time and ability to clean up the myriad messes and do endless loads of laundry. Also, it was summer,so we could be outside to minimize the indoor messes. Night time was still time for Pull-ups, but those only lasted another 2 or 3 weeks. It is very frustrating when you know they are old enough to train and they just are being stubborn. Be patient. It will happen sooner than you think. Good luck.

Answer 5

I've noticed that the most frustrated parents are those that are only dealing with potty training when they think of it. Do you have to pee-pee? and when the child pee/poops his PULL UPS.

You have to make potty training a round the clock deal. Priority 1 every minute of the day till they've got it. (assuming thery're ready). Buy potty books, the little toy dolls w/ toilets (there's a cool Ready Rabbit one), sing about the potty, talk about pee and poop nonstop. Having one potty chair in the bath and one in they're bedroom is helpful. EVERYTHING should be in happy positive reference to how good they're trying/doing or you ruin whatever progress you've made. Let him pick out new underwear! carry plastic bags around w/ extra pants.

Answer 6

I was at the dentist yesterday and was talking with my hygienist about potty training (her son is 5). She had her husband train her son at 2 1/2 with a "potty training weekend". She left town with a girlfriend and the weekend consisted of her husband and her son watching potty training videos, reading potty training books, aiming for cheerios in the toilet and nothing but potty training activities. When she came home he was potty trained but they still needed the pull-ups at night.

My son will be 2 1/2 in August and we are planning this event. I think it has to be fun and education at this age; since they are so curious.

At 3 1/2 this would probably be just as easy if not easier.

Answer 7

Don't let it become a power struggle. Respect your child and let him move at his own pace. Let him make the decision to do it for a positive reason, such as, let him see how convenient it is. It is terribly abusive to do as some of the other posters have recommended (making the child dip his underwear in the toilet, denying snacks or making the child sit for 30 minutes on the toilet!!). Don't traumatize your child. Don't worry, eventually he'll potty train, there is no point in ruining the trust your child has in you just to speed up potty training by a couple of months, and those terrible methods could actually delay potty training. Trust your mothering instincts and don't listen to people who tell you to be mean to your child. Don't make your child cry or worry over potty training! (By the way, the other posters' methods also lead to constipation in children who are not ready to use the toilet but are being told that they are not allowed to use diapers.)

Answer 8

My son is 3.5 years old and just started using the potty we tried and tried for a month every day...nothing I got fed up and one day he came in the living room and told us he had to poop, and from then on he has been using the potty.. But I like the idea to take the pullups away and give him "big boy" underwear, good luck, I know it was a struggle for us..some kids just are not ready when the parents are..

Answer 9

When we were ready to potty train, we bought a bunch of books (Too Big for Diapers--Ernie is potty training; The Potty Book for Boys; The Potty Book for Girls, etc). There are tons out there. Check Amazon, E-Bay, Barnes & Noble on line...you'll find tons. It was fun for both of us to read them and it helped reinforce the idea. I also picked up a couple potty training books for parents. I think it all went pretty well. Give it a whirl and good luck!

Answer 10

i had the exact same problem. my son is a fussy, obsessive, stubborn child, and potty training was not on his list of things to do. i tried every bribe in the book, everything - short of threatening him or making him feel bad about it. try not show your stress - it can harm him more. one day, i just prayed hard. i figure if god can split the sea, he can help me train my child :) wll, the same day, he told me that he wanted to learn how to sit on the toilet so he can go to preschool for big boys...

you might want to back off for a while. i did that. i put him back in diapers, put the potty away, stopped mentioning it. he then stopped feeling threatened by the whole thing. itook him with me to choose a seat for the toilet, which he likes better than the potty. i gave him turns to sit on the seat, like it was a priveledge. i gave him treats and books for while he was on so as to lengthen the time he was on. i tried to sit him on it 10 or so minutes after he drank water. one day, he made a wee, and we have never looked back. he asked me to send him to preschool in underwear - i am lucky that they allow that and are part of the training process.... we still have a long way to go. he still wees on the floor and in his pants, and will not use any toilet but the one in the house, so going out is a real challenge.....

dont worry - you will get there. i never thought i would and look where we are 3 weeks later!