My friend of 9 years is watching my son and getting paid from the state because he has this thing called respit care because of his dissability. well i found out that she has her 9 yr old daughter watch him on the playground while she is sitting in the house. Plus he comes home mouthy and rude from her girls. well tried talking to her but she denys that her kids have any problems she thinks her kids are perfect. The state had me find someone for my sons respit care so i picked her now i want to get rid of her and i dont want to hurt our friendship so dont know if i should just let him continue to go there her respit work is done the end of july or just can her but if i can her i dont know how to i tried.
2006-06-08 13:23:42 · 12 answers · asked by Ann A 2 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Parenting
The safety of your child is more important than this friendship. What kind of friend is it that doesn't take your concerns seriously. Just say "I value our friendship and would like it to continue...but I no longer require your services>" and "thank you ".
2006-06-08 13:27:55 · answer #1 · answered by toe poe gee gee oh 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Ann, the most important thing is your child. If he's not being well looked after then you cant leave him in her care. Her children are obviously too young and irresponsible to watch him on the playground. Personally, because of the friendship, I would sit down over a coffee or something and talk to her. Tell her your concerns. That you are not happy to have her children watching him. Tell her you expect her to do that and that her children need to stop being rude around him because he is learning it and copying it. Tell her that her friendship means alot to you and you dont want to lose that, however, this is your son, and if she's not prepared to look after him properly and control the enviroment he's in, then you will have to find another respite carer. Hopefully your friendship will be fine, however, if she stops being your friend over this...so be it. Your sons health, safety and well being must be more important than any friendship. Good luck.
2006-06-08 13:36:56 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
First of all your children come before any friendship. It is your responsibility to take care of your children and if you fined that the care they are getting is not the best for them then it is time to find a new caregiver. She may get upset and not talk to you and if that happens she was never a true friend to begin with. Weigh it out in both hands "my children" or "my friendship" and theres your answer. Good luck Mom!
2006-06-09 03:11:29 · answer #3 · answered by JAYNE C 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well you need to decide what is more important- your son or your friend. Then tell her that you want someone else to care for your son. Does this lady only have girls? You could tell her you want him to have little boys to play with too. Or just say that you have a difference of opinion about his care, and since you care about your friendship you are going to find different care so your difference of opinions does not come between you. Don't say you are right and she is wrong, just say "difference of opinion."
Be firm- your son is important to you.
2006-06-08 13:29:14 · answer #4 · answered by korbbec 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Just tell her that the state was going to evaluate her and you knew that she didn't meet their criteria so you decided to pick a state certified person Or something like that. Make something up if you have to. But if sh is denying that it's her kids and she says that she's not having her kid keep an eye on yours then I wouldn't really want to be friends with her if I were you.
2006-06-08 13:30:15 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your son comes first, before the friendship. If she is a true friend then she will understand if you tell her nicely that you do not feel comfortable with her watching your son anymore and you just want the best for him. Just tell her before it's too late.
2006-06-08 13:29:23 · answer #6 · answered by Ja Diva 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
First , find some one else. Then tell her you found a better program for him that will better suit his needs. Tell her you found it on the Internet and your sons doctor recommends it. She doesn't need to know who is really taking care of him or why. Just have a date of when the new "program" starts, and that is when her duties end.
2006-06-08 13:30:23 · answer #7 · answered by sweetiepie 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hurt your friendship? She is having her 9 yr old kid watch your child, she obviously does not care for your child or how that may affect you. This is YOUR child, wake up lady, fire her!
2006-06-08 13:29:30 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You should keep your son at the top of your priorities, If he is getting bad language from her or her daughters i would find someone else. you probally need someone more qualified for your son. I feel for ya i know it will be hard to tell her.
2006-06-08 13:34:01 · answer #9 · answered by aprilrain 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
find a replacement then tell her the truth she'll probably be upset at first but if she's really a good friend she'll get over it pretty quick GOOD LUCK
2006-06-08 13:27:02 · answer #10 · answered by laura468 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋