Why is ok for a 25 year old to date a 35 year old but its so wrong for a 14 year old to date a 20 year old?

Question

oh well.. thanks you guys. But lets say a person is 14 and the other is 20, most of you would say that the relationship is immature... when the 14 year old is 20, the 20 year old with be 26. Its ok to date now but not 6 years ago?? I asked because my 14 year old little cousin was dating a 19 year old and they were together for 3 years. Believe it or not,she dumped him last week. Its weird how things work out..

Answer 1

First off a 25 year old in more emotionally mature than a 14 year old. Secondly the difference in maturity level between a 25 yr old and a 35 yr old less than the difference than a 20 yr old and a 14 yr old. Alot of growing up goes on in those years between 20 an 14, where a 35 and 25 aren't really all that much different

Answer 2

Well when I was in high school I use to always date the older guys. When we are young in age we aren't mature enough to see what a 20 year old wants from a 14 year old. Usually if someone is in there 20's chasing after a 14 year old then that person has some hidden agenda going on. By the age of 25 year have had hopefully more maturity and experience on dating and it makes a little more since to go after someone older. Email me I might can go into more detail for you.

Answer 3

It really comes down to maturity. I know at 14 some people are very mature but the majority of people aren't. At 14 your just too young...not an adult yet to make some of the huge decissions that come along with being an adult and in the area of having sex. Someone who is in a ralationship and they are 25 and with someone 35 has more in common sexually and understands their consequences like an adult should. Even though the years are less far apart when you are 14 and 20 the 14 year old just doesn't fully comprehend the consequences of having sex at that age. I don't know your age and if you happen to be 14 i'm not busting on you but this is how the world views it and has put some laws in place to enforce it. In many states if the girl were to be 18 she would be fine dating anyone she wanted to date, becaue they would see her as an adult capable of making her/his own decissions. The part of this that i don't really like is that there is a huge double standard when it comes to men and woman in respect to this. Men can be young and have sex but if the woman is older she is nearly never punished? Just one of those things i guess. Hope i helped answer your question.

Answer 4

Because a 14 year old is not physically,mentally or emotionally mature. Once they are 18 or 20, they will be and they can date an older person. When little kids date they should date someone their own age.Personally, I think 14 is almost too young to really date. If you can't even drive a car without an adult with you, are you really old enough to have relationship of that seriousness? Anyways, final answer, maturity level.

Answer 5

If society decided to accept 14 and 20 yr olds to date, where then does it end. Next it will be 10 yr olds and 20yr. And so on and so on. At 14 you have not matured enough to meet the emotional needs of someone that age. Get out of High School first. Live awhile and then if you still like older men go for it.

Answer 6

Because 25 or 35 yr old is an adult and it doesn't really make that big of a difference. When you 14 your still a kid and although a 20 yr old is still a kid too they are too old to be going out with a 14 yr old.

Answer 7

Because people are hypocrites and want to force their morality onto others.

"When you are 18 or above, you can date whoever you want because you are considered an ADULT."

What is so magical about the number 18? Are you saying that that you actually believe that when an individual turns 18 they are some how instantaneously endowed with: more knowledge and better judgment then they possessed just an hour before?

And saying it's wrong to question the AoC because it happens to be the current law is a cop out. If you are going to take that position then you have to assume that all laws are just (morally sound) on the basis that they exist as laws! This is obviously an insane position to take. In that case you'd have to believe that laws sanctioning slavery or forcing Jewish citizens into death camps in Nazi Germany were just laws.

The age that is appropriate for someone to engage in sexual activity has already been determined by our creator or nature depending on your belief system. And that age is puberty. Or more specifically moment in time when an individual is first capable of conceiveing a child.

For females that would be the age that they first menstrate and for males it would be the age at which they can ejaculate sperm.
That is after all, the practical purpose of having sex. To create the next generation and ensure the survival of the human race.

People were allowed to engage in sexual activity after puberty before the 1950's and it worked for trillions of people during thousands of years of recorded history. In fact it worked fine before we started changing our social moorings in America and it works fine in thousands of other countries now.

During the 1950's and earlier getting married and engageing in sexual activity at age 14 wasn't thought to be unusual. It was actually the norm. Many peoples grandparents and great grandparents had a 13-16 year old wife. That was just the way it was back then and it was socially acceptable. But I don't hear any grandmothers complaining about how Grandpa raped them because they got married and engaged in sexual intercourse when they were 14 years old.

A lot of people consider statements like this perverse because it's easier to simply support that status quo; that way you don't have to expend any intellectual capital to actually analyise the problem and come to your own conclusions. Also many people support the prevaling ethos of the time because they just want to take the path of least resistance. And finally many people don't want to deal with any critisim because of their beliefs. This is one reason that so many people are closet: Homosexuals, pologimists, BDSM enthusaists, etc. They surely don't believe that what they are doing is wrong, otherwise they would stop doing it. They don't speak out simply because they don't want to be constantly harrassed and discriminated against.

Sure it's easier to just support the status quo and be on your way. But taking this approach is also the lazy and cowardly way out.

I would suggest a law that would roll back the age of consent to the average age of puberty. And there should be an acception in the law that states: that it is legal to have sex with someone under the age of consent IF it can be medically proven that they have already entered into puberty and can help conceive a child.

Of course the Soccor moms', overprotective dads', and the Christian Taliban would have a brain hemmorage if this happened. So I don't think I'll ever see it happen in the U.S. with in my lifetime.

Answer 8

because 14 is too young to be responcible for a complex adult relationship. Children must grow and learn how to cope and deal with love and lovers. Thrusting an underage child into a relationship with someone who's been in the adult world longer is an unfair advantage.

Answer 9

because when you are 18 or above, you can date whoever you want because you are considered an ADULT. if you are 14 and you are dating a 20 year old, then you should know thatyou are a TEEN dating an ADULT so obviously, that is wrong.

Answer 10

At 14 you're too young to know what you want, and what's good for you. And you're not ready to meet up to the needs of a 20 year old guy.

At 25 you're a consenting adult... and likely sexually active. There's very little that can happen at that point.