if not what should i do? i need to work to feel existing. i need to know my kids are happy. i need to prove to my husband i can handle it. tell me please about your experience.
2006-06-08 05:17:15 · 10 answers · asked by ? 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
First and foremost- you are not Wonderwoman... never were, never will be. My first suggestion is to let go of the idea that if you can't do it all or keep it all together, that you're lacking. It simply means that you're human.
Is your husband pressuring you to be able to "handle it"? Or is it just you feeling inadequate? If the pressure is from him, I think he's being unreasonable. He gets up in the morning, goes to work, gets to focus on work for 8 hours then he gets to leave work and come home.
You, on the other hand, get up and immediately are "on the clock"... You're "Mom"- you've got meals to make, kids to shuttle around, homework to check, etc.... Then you get to go to work and focus on work for 8 hours. And then you come home to your "second job"- making dinner, helping with homework, cleaning, laundry, etc...
You actually suffer from a VERY common malady- the Modern Woman's Double-Shift.
If you are still wanting to do it all, I'd suggest getting a planner. Mine has 1 week/page. Each day is laid out vertically, with time slots all the way down the page, starting at 7am, ending at 9p, with 15-min slots. If you are one to micro-manage, this could help.
BTW- I heard that with everything an at-home mom does, in the corporate world, she's worth about $30k/year...
2006-06-08 09:16:05 · answer #1 · answered by Yoda's Duck 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Yes, it is possible to be all those things, but usually not all at once. Juggling job and kids and still be true to your self is not always easy, you must have the help and support of all involved. Hubby should help with household chores and the kids too. Even young children can be expected to pick up their dirty clothes off the floor, and take out the trash. And don't sweat it when things aren't all perfect all at once. Life is messy.
2006-06-08 05:25:47 · answer #2 · answered by smartypants909 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes, it is possible. The best advice I can give you is to make a detailed schedule for yourself. Set a designated time for everything ~ wake up, go to work, pick up kids, make dinner, and so on. I literally have scheduled times for *me* ~ quiet time with morning coffee, work out time at the gym, etc. ~ and I stick to the schedule religiously. We have designated "family time" and "date night" for just us. The most important thing is that your husband supports your efforts. If you are constantly "proving yourself" to him because he has doubts, that makes it more difficult than it has to be. It's all about balance and working together as parents... and it can be done! Good luck!
2006-06-08 06:02:41 · answer #3 · answered by browneyedgirl 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
My experience was after 20 years marriage 5 kids and running my own business from home in between breastfeeds, no sleep, trying to be all things to all people equals nervous breakdown - save yourself and say no to some things, if it gets to busy. It is impossible to please every one all the time so aim to please some of the people some of the time including you! It's all about balance. Try reading some spiritual books to give you enlightenment on balance in your life. If you over kill on pleasing all and sundry - you suffer - if you overkill on pleasing you - others suffer - weighing it all up and nano-ing it all down is the art and sometimes that's exhausting! Treat you self like you are your own best friend coz you are.
2006-06-08 06:19:03 · answer #4 · answered by tash 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Modern feminism is basically a communist fraud designed specifically to put you in the position you are in. The truth is, that if you want to be fulfilled, focus on your family and forget the job. Your life will immediately and dramatically improve. If you want to go back to work, wait until the kids are grown.
2006-06-08 05:22:09 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
If I worked, I was not taking care of the children--if I was taking care of the children, I was not bringing in any money. Either way, I was wrong--or that was how I was made to feel.
If you are working, your husband should be sharing household duties and childcare with you. You are not Super Woman--you cannot do it all by yourself--at least, not well enough to make you proud of yourself.
2006-06-08 05:22:20 · answer #6 · answered by Holiday Magic 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
im not married yet sure that's achievable,i stated my mom,she is a competent spouse,a competent daughter in regulation, a worrying mom & also a theory of a famouse college of our united states,often times i scold her as now to not have Time for her own
2016-11-14 08:48:25 · answer #7 · answered by dubinsky 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
just take it easy...
the more diffiicult u make it, the hardest it will be. give as much attention as u can to everything. no one is perfect, or does perfectly.
2006-06-08 05:29:32 · answer #8 · answered by yonka 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
LOL I WAS RAISE ON A FARM MAMA WAS THERE DADDY WAS THERE ON PURE LOVE IT WAS A HIGH I HAD FUN KNOWING THESE TWO PEOPLE WHO RAISE ME WAS RIGHT ON LOVE WAS SIMPLE SO I WANT TO SAY RIGHT ON TO MAMA &DADDA WHO ARE FARM BRED
2006-06-08 07:21:51 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Just do it if that's what you want. Please yourself first.
2006-06-08 05:20:42 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋