A little girl walks into a pet shop and asks in the sweetest little lisp: "Excuthe me, mithter, do you keep wittle wabbits?"
And the shopkeeper gets down on his knees, so that he's on her level, and asks: "Do you want a wittle white wabby or a soft and fuwwy bwack wabby or maybe one like that cute wittle bwown wabby over there?"
The little girl puts her hands on her knees, leans forward and says in a quiet voice: "I don't fink my pyfon really giveths a thit."
2006-06-08 04:25:30 · 19 answers · asked by c_o_e_u_s 2 in Entertainment & Music ➔ Jokes & Riddles
hahaha ..... breathe ..... hahahaha.... breathe... hahahaha.... breathe.... hahahahah... breathe.stop it man ur drivin me wild.im gonna tell that to every1 i see now!!!! 20 out of 10
2006-06-08 05:30:47 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 3⤋
~that was great, here's one for you:~
It's Saturday morning and Bob's just about to set off on a round of golf, when he realizes that he forgot to tell his wife that the guy who fixes the washing machine is coming around at noon. So Bob heads back to the clubhouse and phones home.
"Hello?" says a little girl's voice.
"Hi, honey, it's Daddy," says Bob. "Is Mommy near the phone?"
"No, Daddy. She's upstairs in the bedroom with Uncle Frank."
After a brief pause, Bob says, "But you haven't got an Uncle Frank, honey!"
"Yes, I do, and he's upstairs in the bedroom with Mommy!"
"Okay, then. Here's what I want you do. Put down the phone, run upstairs and knock on the bedroom door and shout in to Mommy and Uncle Frank that my car's just pulled up outside the house."
"Okay, Daddy!" A few minutes later, the little girl comes back to the phone. "Well, I did what you said, Daddy."
"And what happened?"
"Well, Mommy jumped out of bed with no clothes on and ran around screaming, then she tripped over the rug and went out the front window and now she's all dead."
"Oh, my God! What about Uncle Frank?"
"He jumped out of bed with no clothes on too, and he was all scared and he jumped out the back window into the swimming pool. But he must have forgot that last week you took out all the water to clean it, so he hit the bottom of the swimming pool and now he's dead too."
There is a long pause.
"Swimming pool? Is this 854-7039?"
2006-06-08 05:17:59 · answer #2 · answered by hlpz76 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Three men who were lost in the forest were captured by cannibals. The cannibal king told the prisoners that they could live if they pass a trial. The first step of the trial was to go to the forest and get ten pieces of the same kind of fruit. So all three men went separate ways to gather fruits.
The first one came back and said to the king, "I brought ten apples." The king then explained the trial to him. "You have to shove the fruits up your butt without any expression on your face or you'll be eaten."
The first apple went in... but on the second one he winced out in pain, so he was killed.
The second one arrived and showed the king ten berries. When the king explained the trial to him he thought to himself that this should be easy. 1...2...3...4...5...6...7...8... and on the ninth berry he burst out in laughter and was killed.
The first guy and the second guy met in heaven. The first one asked, "Why did you laugh, you almost got away with it?" The second one replied, "I couldn't help it, I saw the third guy coming with pineapples."
2006-06-08 04:29:09 · answer #3 · answered by bigjimmyguy 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Assuming you're an adolescent, i could say wait and notice. skinny ectomorph boys become tall, narrow adult adult males who in no way get beer bellies. Be a severe high quality guy and the ladies folk will love you. commence weight training and you'd be able to upload some muscle. consume top, too. solid success!
2016-09-28 04:50:18 · answer #4 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Precious.
2006-06-08 06:31:22 · answer #5 · answered by ticklefoot 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
That same little girl was in the park playing with her dog and this policeman says to her,"hello little girl what's your name?",and she replies "Rosie"."Well isn't that a pretty name how did you get that?".
"Well when I was really small and in my mummys tummy a rose petal landed on her tummy so she called me Rosie".
"That's a lovely story" says the cop,"and what's your doggys name?"
"Piggy" says the girl.
"And why is he called Piggy?".
"'Cos he ***** pigs!"
2006-06-08 04:38:43 · answer #6 · answered by Dix a Dublin 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
good one 9
2006-06-08 08:02:44 · answer #7 · answered by ♥Stranger In Maine™♥ (Thriller) 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
lmao that was a good one can you email me some jokes
2006-06-08 04:29:22 · answer #8 · answered by miriam_santiago88 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Ha! Nice.
2006-06-08 04:45:32 · answer #9 · answered by sshazzam 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
totally cute
2006-06-08 04:29:27 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
funny i'll give it an 8.
2006-06-08 06:44:20 · answer #11 · answered by seaturtle36 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋