I've been dating Indian guys for a while now, and I know my parents don't like it. They misunderstand the culture, and think they are all bad. I don't know how to convince them that my guy is good, not a terrorist, and that he DOES treat me right. What can I say to them?
2006-06-07 18:18:57 · 27 answers · asked by Rachel F 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Why even bother trying to convince them of anything?
Here's what you say: "I like this guy and I'm staying with him. I love you guys and wish you could accept this. If you can't, let's work out a way to be in contact, because I value our family. Tell me what you need."
At least then you can negotiate a settlement of your differences. What is it with you women that you get so hung up on trying to change everybody? For goodness' sake, people don't change. Let them be who they are and deal with yourself instead.
2006-06-07 18:22:14 · answer #1 · answered by jackmack65 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Try to be nice at everything.
Don't convince your parents by convincing..
Just show them how you changed after you met this guy .. in a good way.. !!!
and epitomize the thing that you learned it from him !!!
remember even though your parents are little bit of somewhat racist ... It doesn't mean they are bad .
They just never experienced close relationship with the other race...
and when you don't know about something well... then
you get afraid of it .. and tend to see only the bad aspect of it..
These are just common... so don't argue with your parents over and start fighting against them..
just show them how good you are
and make them believe that whatever you do
must be right to do !!
Good luck !!! and Love your parents first !!!
what they do is all because they care 'bout you and love you
so much !!!
so you must understand that first !!!
2006-06-07 18:30:48 · answer #2 · answered by mkcandyrocky 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your parents love you. Be happy for that. The fear (real or perceived) of their daughter being mistreated is frightening to them. Perhaps you should research the culture of these young men. Also, consider how he talks about his mother, sisters, ect... is there respect for these women on an equal level to their male counterparts? I once didn't think relegion mattered. It does. I was married 10 years just fine...then we had children. Things changed. I was expected to live a certain way, look a certain way, act a certain way...like his mother had done. 15 years of this. Three therepists, two psychiaterists and a marriage counsler(who was a psychologist) later I am now a divorced single mom with two daughters. And I hate to bring this up...but if you know they disaprove, why exactly do you continue to pursue Indian men?I hope you are not just using them to rebel against your parents, these young men have hearts that can break also. But if you must have a rebuttle, calmly give your parents examples of when you had made responsible decisions.Show them you are trustworthy. Tell them if at any time you feel uncomfortable in this relationship you will end it. And please remember your parents didnt get to be where they are in life without going through where you are.
2006-06-07 19:00:31 · answer #3 · answered by dw 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Well, just show that you're true to your boyfriend and committed to being in a relationship with him. You also need to educate your parents on the beauty of Indian culture. They sound really close-minded. And, since when are Indians terrorists?? Hello?
2006-06-07 18:21:45 · answer #4 · answered by it's me! 6 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Try to sit down with your parents and have a serious conversation about relationships. Ask them what they had hoped and dreamed for you to have. Ask them to list all the qualities in each other that have made their relationship succesful. Speak with them and show them that you are level headed and intelligent. show them that you have high standards, and ask them to trust you to make smart choices. Maybe if they trust that you have self respect and that you demand equality and real love they might consider that if you have all these qualities and are with this guy, that maybe he's not so bad. Hopefully they will at least make an effort to get to know him and give him a chance, if they see that you have your head on straight and he is your choice. Try giving them some credit for raising you to be such a good person and maybe with a little flattery they will at least be willing to listen...
2006-06-07 18:29:12 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
My parents use to do the same thing xD Awwww this brings back better times ^_^ If your not doing anything bad then why not keep your door open? Its your parents they will not come into your room begging you to tell them about Ashley or whoever. Plus they would still be able to hear you the walls don't keep secrets! I found out that I got in less trouble with my door open all the time then if I had it closed because I felt like they could hear more just like you THINK but oohhh no they know trust me door closed or door open they know ^^
2016-03-26 22:16:54 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You are fighting a uphill battle on this one. If the young man has courage, is brave and so forth, he could talk to your parents.
If he is of good moral character, principle , honest, caring and committed to you and your relationship he has to ackknoldge yourr parents fears and dislikes. Time and his behavior may change their opinion over a long period of time and it may not.
Tell them on neutral ground -- not at their home, how you think, feel, and would like them to be receptive. Ask them for their help of what they want. You should really think about your parents wishes as well if this a continious cycle of not being receptive what your parents concerns, best interests and so forth. Ask a netural party to help.
2006-06-07 18:25:17 · answer #7 · answered by Robert Miller 95670 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I've never been in that situation, but I applaud your bravery for sticking up to your parents. Keep the courage, be persistent, don't ever back down. You are what matters, you know in your heart what is true and what matters, your parents can respect this or else they need to grow up. If you really want to kick it up a notch, see if you can't invite them over to his house for dinner to meet his parents. Be the adult.. love knows know boundaries, creed, or race and that's the truth. Let others know that, and stand behind it every step of the way.
2006-06-07 18:25:11 · answer #8 · answered by phishycoding 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If a person has a good character I think it would shine through to anyone. It may take some longer than others to realize it. Your parents want what is best for you and if you are in love with someone of good character, then they will see it. "The world will move for love."
2006-06-07 18:27:16 · answer #9 · answered by kingsroadbass@sbcglobal.net 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I am an indian and i know for sure that many western people dont like indians...but all i have to say to them is that not everyone is like that..
And about an individual its always better to know that person before judging anyone..
2006-06-07 18:28:00 · answer #10 · answered by gentle_cute_man 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋