Is $300 to much to spend on my son for his fifth birthday?

Question

Last year for Christmas I could not give my son very much because I had just left my abusive husband and did not have a job. So I felt relly bad about it. So this year for his birthday I spent well over $300. My mom said that was way to much money for a 5 year old boy, but I feel that I am making up for last Christmas. So please tell me if you think it is to much money.

Answer 1

i have been through times with financial restrictions and we have two sons. and i believe it's great you could do this for him.
it's a blessing...and even when you can't he'll no you will you if you can. my boys and i do something special everyday...because i want them to grow up to be well round gentlemen and remember that

sounds like your a very loving mother
and i say good job

Answer 2

If you have the money than no of course not. But don't try to make up for the past, that won't do anything for either of you. You did what you had to do to protect you both which is why you were unable to provide a good Christmas. No need for feeling guilty. Now you have to be careful though because he may remember it next year and then your in trouble. But I think that $300 is a great way to make a big bang, kinda as a new begining. And hey it only comes once a year right!

Answer 3

Well, that is very kind and considerate of you, but he is only five. If you are getting him things that he really really wants then by all means let him have a good year, but (not to say 5 year olds can't think or anything) I don't really think he cares what exactly you get him "to make up for Christmas." I don't mean to demean you in any way, but I am just thinking practically. I have a cat, and whenever we get him a big carpet play thing, he just plays with the box....the point is the toy is a waste. Just give your child some love, especially after an abusive husband, and that is the most important gift of all.

Answer 4

It depends on what you spent it on. There are too potential problems to you spending too much money:

1. Using important money for unimportant things - if you are not going to eat or are going to miss a payment on your electric bill or something, then yes, that is too much.

2. Spoiling your son - if he understands that the things he is getting for his birthday are a special treat and will not be spoiled by them, it's OK. If he will expect this every year and be ungrateful and spoiled, it's a problem. Only you know this about your son.

Do not feel like you have to make up for last Christmas. He is too young to understand that concept. All he really needs is lots of real love, not things.

Answer 5

Your mother may know more about the situation than we do like is he spoiled because you feel guilty for leaving an abusive spouce and his dad which, by the way was the right thing to do. I would not spend 300 dollars on my kids birthday unless it was something that all could enjoy like a getting an x box and some games for the birthday but saying it's for everyone becasue I got a bonus at work.

Answer 6

Can you adopt me? Holy cats, yeah, that was WAY too much for a 5 year old. I know you feel like you need to make it up to him but here's the thing - the doesn't know that you couldn't give him a good Christmas. He'll probably never even remember if he got a gift at all. Here's another hitch - he'll never remember that you went WAY over board this birthday, so why do it? You want to make sure that this is a one time thing because as he gets older, he'll start to expect you to spend more and more and he'll appreciate it less and less. Don't do it again. You're doing more harm than good.

Answer 7

I think it's great that you want to provide nice things for your son. I think it's even better that you're able to. However, I also think that a 5 year old won't know the difference. So yes, $300 on a five year old is too much. But as long as you're happy and don't feel anything is wrong with doing that - do not worry! You're a good mom regardless.

Answer 8

Well, why don't you put most of that money in an education fund, and buy him a small gift. Then plan the entire day with him doing what he picks out. Laser tag, the museum, skating, swimming, etc. It is more important to build memories instead of cluttering up your house with things that he will loose interest in with in a matter of days. I think a five year old, as precious and wonderful as they are, are not able to truly appreciate expensive gifts. PS## hooray for you for having the strength to leave an abusive husband. That right there is probably the most loving thing you could have done for your son.

Answer 9

Are you going to be able to spend like this for every special occasion? Since you are doing it this time, will he feel let down next time you get him gifts for something else. It is sad you weren't able to give your son much for Christmas, but it sounds like you were able to give him some. Why do you think/feel he needs "lots" of things? Things are not what true happiness is about in life. A few things would be nice, but sounds like you bought enough to overwhelm him. How about putting some away (in a closet or someplace where he won't find them) and when other special days/holidays come up, give one or two of them to him then. Too many things at one time aren't always as appreciated as getting just a couple at a time. Teach him to be happy with a few things, instead of a bunch at a time. Better values for him to learn to become a good adult. (It is OK to have some, and that he doesn't need or expect it all at once)

Answer 10

You need to start your son's college fund and let him know something besides giving gifts shows love. It is not the gifts of goodies one gives it is the frequency they show their love. If you can teach a child to be satisfied with something simple then he will appreciate things more. Giving too much confuses the child into thinking the more you get the more someone loves you. Material things do not make people happy if they are too easy to get. Working for stuff makes it important and that is important to learn. Give a reasonable gift or maby something he wants very much but it should not be extravagant. Have a special day and go someplace that the child will remember long after the gift is gone.

Answer 11

It really depends on what your financial status is. If you had the money and felt "financially" comfortable spending it then that's great.

Just DON'T PLAY Mommy against Daddy thing. Meaning don't feel you have to "compete" with your husband.

You give your baby lot's of love, hugs, and kisses and tell them "you are fantastic" and other praises. I really don't think money will matter in the LONG run.

Just remember don't have competing games. Mommy or Daddy ALWAYS want to look the best in their child's eye.

Because you two are separated, there is ALWAYS competition because YOU and your SPOUSE are feeling guilty and are trying to compensate with materialistic objects.

This is my presumption ONLY. I've been through it, although I was the child, not the parent.


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