I work part time and my husband works also, my mother in law takes care of my kids, and everytime I go to work or come back from work she is just sitting there. I mean literaly sitting there she watches tv all day long and let's my kids do what ever they want they are only 1 and 2 so they are always up to something I have told my husband that she needs to get up and so something or we need to take the kids to a day care. Not only does she sit and do nothing she will give my kids soda, cookies and candy I am so fed up with her!! Should I just take my kids to a day care or not pay her, oh yeah and to top if off we pay her per week so I feel like I am paying her to sit on her *** all day long!!
2006-06-07 08:15:50 · 33 answers · asked by ~Ms Eli~ 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
First of all, why are you paying their grandmother to babysit?
Secondly, daycare. Nuff said.
2006-06-07 08:18:45 · answer #1 · answered by Pitchow! 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
First of all, how old is she? Maybe she is too old to handle a 1 and 2 year old. Or maybe she does activities with them in the mornings and is so tired by the time you get there she is chilling. As for the soda, cookies, and candy, she may think since she's the grandma she has the right to spoil them. I would suggest sitting down with her and your husband and calmly voicing your concerns. Don't make accusations, just say things like "We were just wondering what you and the kids spend the day doing" or "We prefer that our kids limit their sugar intake". Trust me, faults included, grandma is still better than daycare. Your kids will be sick more often if they are in daycare.
And why did you agree to pay her in the first place? She should be glad for the chance to spend time with her grandchildren.
2006-06-07 08:25:46 · answer #2 · answered by startwinkle05 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If your are paying her for a service "DayCare" and are not receiving the service that you are paying for, I suggest that you go somewhere that you can have your needs for your children met and your concerns put to rest.
Either way your paying somebody, so you might as well get what you want.
***But remember she is your Mother-in-law and you will need to break it to her in a way that wont threaten your relationship with her or cause to much friction with you & your husband or Him and his mom. Play it on the Kids needs to interact with their peers and other adults outside of the family. Tell her you want them to start getting more social exposure or something to that effect? Make it seem like your also helping her somehow (freeing up her time for etc...) It must seem beneficial or it may come across as vendictive. But by no means should keep your kids in an environment that you don't think is good or healthy for them
2006-06-07 08:26:34 · answer #3 · answered by Just My Thoughts... 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you are paying you might as well put them in daycare. At least in day care, they will have activities and other kids to interact with. Don't pay her to sit on her a** all day. Just tell her you think the kids need to be around other children.
2006-06-07 08:19:05 · answer #4 · answered by Fool in the Rain 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
What is it with mothers-in-law lately? Did they have a big meeting and decide to drive us all crazy or something??
If you're paying her there is no reason for her not to do as you ask. If you want to be technical and b*tchy about it, you are her employer. Leave her a schedule for the kids, activities and games for them, and a list of your preferences for snacks and mealtimes. BE SPECIFIC! Call several times a day to check in. If she's not willing to care for them properly, fire her and take them to a daycare. At least they'll eat better!
2006-06-07 09:39:21 · answer #5 · answered by browneyedgirl 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You said that you work part time, you don't know what she's doing with the children while you're at work. As far as the diet, bring the foods you want your children to eat . The sweets are just a "Gran-ma thang", even if she didn't watch them, I'm sure she'd be sneaking them sweets. You gotta tell your husband to talk to his mother or you speak to her Mother to Mother. One and two year olds are always up to something. No one is gonna love those children like their own Gran-ma, though, think about it. Daycare is much more expensive too.
2006-06-07 08:23:41 · answer #6 · answered by gzmom 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Ok, you shouldnt have to pay a grandmother to watch her grandchildren, she should be happy to spend the time with them, that said, please put your children in child care. They are not learning from her very good habbits and they need more structure. Make sure she knows why youre doing it. Tell her if her caregiving skills dont improve you will take them elsewhere so that your wishes and opinions will be respected and followed. Also, if you are paying her that makes her an employee and that means (just like any other job out there) if you dont so your job to your bosses satisfaction what happens????? You get FIRED! right? She should respect you and your husbands parenting rules and follow them regardless. period..
2006-06-07 13:38:27 · answer #7 · answered by Mia 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well either you can take them to day care or you can find a baby sitter someone that you can trust because if u leave them there they obviously are not getting the vitamins and minerals they need at her house so u can either tell her that you have simple instructions like a planned meal structure she needs to follow or you are taking them to a day care that do give the kids what they need and they have the appropriate supervision they need..
2006-06-07 08:25:16 · answer #8 · answered by Sierra E 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you need a young girl to look after them and they can go and visit and stay with grand mother once a week.
she has done her job by raising her kids...
so may be it is good idea to take your kids to a day care ,and pls do not forget to thank her for taking care of your kids... and be respectful... there will be a day you will be a grand mother and who knows if you do the same or not ;)
so thank her and take your kids to a day care or stop working and take care of your kids ( some times that is cheaper than a day care )
Good Luck
2006-06-07 09:33:27 · answer #9 · answered by Me 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Let you know that you feel your expectation of child care might be more than she is up to. You can tell her you'd like you're children to be in a regular daycare where they get to socialize and interact with other children. They also have programs there that will enrich the children.
If she says 'now I'll never get to spend any time with my grandkids', you can tell her that if she'd like to plan a day to take them to the zoo (or whatever) she'd welcome to do so, but you're not going to pay her to spend time with her grandchildren.
Then thank her for all the time and effort she has put forth.
(Don't burn down any bridges)
Good Luck
2006-06-07 08:24:49 · answer #10 · answered by mcdane01 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No wonder you are ticked off. Your children have to be fed properly, read to, talked to, played with. Limited snacks. Sounds like you have to remove your children from her care and place them in a daycare. It may cost more financially but you will know that the children are getting the care and attention that they need at that age. Good luck
2006-06-07 08:22:59 · answer #11 · answered by older woman 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋