To evolutionists and Creationists...I got arrested...I need help....?

Question

I went to the zoo with friends. We went to the Monkey Island house. While inside, I found a friendly monkey. I walked up the it and he put his arms around me, and we hugged, we became friends. The zoo people called the Police and had me arrested for "Attempting To Molest a Animal".

I need help when I go before judge and explain how we are ancestors, just reuniting in a hug. I need help to prove that the Judge himself and I were monkeys. I feel like I'm being took for $$$$. am I being "Framed".?

Can you help me?

Answer 1

I just hope the monkey was of age.

Answer 2

Methinks this is a phony question.... Most zoos have a fence or glass partition or something of that nature to separate the visitors from the animals... for the protection of both. In fact, I believe that the law or at the very least the zoo's insurance company would require such separation... for instance, if an animal attacked a small child there would be a HUGE lawsuit-- most likely a multi-million dollar award.

However, I am willing to play Devil's Advocate and ignore that for a minute while I explore this further... keep in mind the following ignores the liability concerns mentioned above and assumes that the zoo took no preventative measures to keep the animals and humans separated..

I fail to see how a simple hug would constitute "molestation" (or the attempt thereof)... if this is the case than most of us have "molested" cats and/or dogs. If you were in a situation where physical contact was possible I would think that there would have to be more to it than what you say. Like you were touching him in an inappropriate manner or the "hug" lasted too long. Monkeys can be friendly creatures, and it is possible that they might try to hug a human *IF* they were able to get close enough to do so... A brief hug therefore would not necessarily lead to such a charge, especially if initiated by the monkey. The zoo's cameras would be able to tell this.

However, as I mentioned above, MOST (if not ALL) zoos have security features in place to prevent humans and animals from mingling. If you jumped a fence or took any action to get around those protections AND were found touching an animal, then yes you might be in some serious trouble... That would be grounds for arrest.

Again, I think this is a phony question... Nice try, though! In the unlikely event you ARE telling the truth, you need a good attorney, not advice from a message board. Also, I don't think that the theory of evolution is a good defense for such a charge.

Answer 3

No where in the bible does it suggest that humans are the descendants of monkeys (creationist).

And contrary to common belief no where in science does it say that humans are the descendants of monkeys.

In science it only suggest that both humans and monkey's share a common ancestor. So at best you are hugging a cousin.

Answer 4

please don't use that argument, for all our sakes. if this is a real question, just say that you didn't know it was against the rules. you shouldn't have hugged the monkey, although i'm sure it was very satisfying.
you aren't being framed, you're being punished for breaking the rules of a zoo. if you're trying to rile up creationists and evolutionists, i hope it won't work.
best of luck at your hearing.

Answer 5

The claim by evolutionist of 99% similarity is nothing more than a misleading propaganda. The genome project of the chimps, Is nothing more than a COMPUTER PROGRAMME. It has not been mapped yet.
In every piece of evolutionist literature, you could read sentences like "we are 99 percent identical to chimps" or "there is only 1 percent of DNA that makes us human." Although no conclusive comparison between human and chimp genomes has been done, the Darwinist ideology led them to assume that there is very little difference between the two species. A study in October 2002 revealed that the evolutionist propaganda on this issue like many others is completely false. Humans and chimps are not "99% similar" as the evolutionist fairy tale went on. Genetic similarity turns out to be less than 95 %. In a news story reported by CNN.com, entitled "Humans, chimps more different than thought," it reads:
There are more differences between a chimpanzee and a human being than once believed, according to a new genetic study.
Biologists have long held that the genes of chimps and humans are about 98.5 percent identical. But Roy Britten, a biologist at the California Institute of Technology, said in a study that a new way of comparing the genes shows that the human and chimp genetic similarity is only about 95 percent. Britten based this on a COMPUTER PROGRAMME that compared 780,000 of the 3 billion base pairs in the human DNA helix with those of the chimp. He found more mismatches than earlier researchers had, and concluded that at least 3.9 percent of the DNA bases were different. This led him to conclude that there is a fundamental genetic difference between the species of about 5 percent.
New Scientist, a leading science magazine and a strong supporter of Darwinism, reported the following on the same subject in an article titled "Human-chimp DNA difference trebled":
We are more unique than previously thought, according to new comparisons of human and chimpanzee DNA. It has long been held that we share 98.5 per cent of our genetic material with our closest relatives. That now appears to be wrong. In fact, we share less than 95 per cent of our genetic material, a three-fold increase in the variation between us and chimps.
Human DNA is also similar to that of the worm, mosquito, and chicken!
75% similarity between the DNA of nematode worms and man
the genes of fruit flies belonging to the Drosophila genus and human genes yielded a similarity of 60%.

Answer 6

listen man, there are signs in the zoo that say "don't touch or feed the animals"
i think you'd have a better time trying to convince the judge that you can't read.

Answer 7

Sounds like they should have let the monkey go and kept you in the cage.

Answer 8

Give the judge a hug, you're up the banana tree any way you look at it.

Answer 9

As usual, you are misinformed. We were never monkeys. Read a book. (And not one written by a preacher, try one written by an actual scientist.)

Answer 10

It's Obvious that u can't explain the evolution part. LoL