A police officer pulls over a speeding car.
The officer says, I clocked you at 80 miles per hour, sir.
" The driver says, "Gee, officer I had it on cruise control at 60, perhaps your radar gun needs calibrating.
"Not looking up from her knitting the wife says: "Now don't be silly, dear, you know that this car doesn't have cruise control.
" As the officer writes out the ticket, the driver looks over at his wife and growls, "Can't you please keep your mouth shut for once?
"The wife smiles demurely and says, "You should be thankful your radar detector went off when it did.
" As the officer makes out the second ticket for the illegal radar detector unit, the man glowers at his wife and says through clenched teeth,
"Darn it, woman, can't you keep your mouth shut?"The officer frowns and says,
"And I notice that you're not wearing your seat belt, sir. That's an automatic $75 fine." The driver says,
"Yeah, well, you see officer, I had it on, but took it off when you pulled me over so that I could get my license out of my back pocket.
"The wife says, "Now, dear, you know very well that you didn't have your seat belt on.
You never wear your seat belt when you're driving." And as the police officer is writing out the third ticket the driver turns to his wife and barks,
"WHY DON'T YOU PLEASE SHUT UP??"The officer looks over at the woman and asks,
"Does your husband always talk to you this way, Ma'am?" NO, Only when he's been drinking!
2006-06-07 08:03:23 · 22 answers · asked by lx 2 in Entertainment & Music ➔ Jokes & Riddles
1 MORE JOKE :
What is the limit of stupidity ???????????????
2006-06-07 08:06:40 · answer #1 · answered by Bhanuja 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
lol! that's really funny! you might enjoy this one:
A young guy is speeding across a bridge in his fancy sports car. Sure enough, a cop with a radar gun is sitting on the other side of the bridge. The cop pulls him over, then walks up to the guy's car and asks, "What's the hurry?" The guy replies, "I'm late for work, officer." "What do you do?" "Well, I'm a rectum stretcher." "What? A rectum stretcher?" The guy explains, "Yeah. I start with a finger, then work my way up to two fingers... eventually I get a hand in, then both hands, and I slowly stretch it until it's about six feet wide." The curious cop asks, "What do you do with a six-foot asshole?" The guy answers, "Well, you give him a radar gun and park him at the end of a bridge."
2006-06-07 09:55:35 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
LMAO That was fuuuunnny. I think though with all the tickets and court fees and fines it would be cheaper on the old guy if he just got a divorce.
2006-06-07 08:10:01 · answer #3 · answered by apache672004 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
That is a terrible joke. Wasnt worth reading all that. A six year old could have made that one up. Heres one, why doesnt Hitler drink? Cause when he has a drink he can get a bit nasty.
2006-06-07 08:09:14 · answer #4 · answered by peaco1000 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
That was GREAT!!
I wonder if the wife was saying the things just to get her husband in trouble, though.
2006-06-07 08:06:39 · answer #5 · answered by ildjb@sbcglobal.net 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Cool
here the 5 reasons why!
1) Funny (DUH!!)
2) Cruel (;P)
3) Umm its Cool :)
4) Its very weird which i like
5) I just like it!!!!
;)
2006-06-07 08:10:26 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes, very funny
2006-06-07 08:10:15 · answer #7 · answered by Irish 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
That is so funny!!! Good one! By the way...peaco1000's joke was NOT funny.
2006-06-07 08:12:47 · answer #8 · answered by altruistic 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
heard it a thousand times but yes i think it is funny
2006-06-07 08:08:04 · answer #9 · answered by jess 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Good one!
2006-06-13 18:05:52 · answer #10 · answered by Kitty Kat 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
hahaha yeah. I think it's funny
2006-06-07 08:07:08 · answer #11 · answered by Let Love In 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋