Why do many old people refuse to live in a nursing home?

Question

I often hear stories of old people who cannot stay on their own any more but who fight tooth and nail against going to the nursing home.

Are nursing homes that bad? What's wrong with living in a nursing home?

Answer 1

I think its just a matter of loosing all of you independance and finally admitting that you can no longer take care of yourself. I think that probably is one of the worst feelings in the world.

Answer 2

I am a nurse in a nursing home. Some of these answers are too much!! The facility I work at houses 105 seniors. When they are first admitted they are lost and confused, who wouldn't be?? The home they had lived in for years has been taken from them and they are put into unfamiliar surroundings, with call bells, hollaring, chaos etc and are told that this is their new home. Most seniors are already suffering some level of dementia or alzheimers and this change only makes things worse for them. There is no "neglect" in the home I work at. Not all nurses can be with residents at the same time. Falls happen, but that is not the fault of the nursing home staff, we can only be at one place at a time, we are not superheros..we are the people you trusted enough to put your loved one into the care of because your loved one turned out to be more work for you than you could handle.
I personally would not want to live in a nursing home. It is a hospital like setting, your independence is gone. People get you up at a certain time, feed you food you didn't decide on (it's what's on the menu for the day), put you down for a nap or shove you by a window or tv, then either move you, or get you up for lunch, after lunch it's back to bed for a nap or back to the window or tv...it's always the same, the only thing that changes is the level of health of a resident (most residents health decline once admitted to a nursing home). It is a stressful job and some days I come home full of anger and anxiety I could explode...but if I have made at least one residents life a little better for a day then it's worth it..

Answer 3

One, the people who go into a nursing home are not treated well. Two, the nurses who are working there really dont treat the patients well. Three, the elderly do not want their indendepence taken away from them, and feel like they have lost all they have. Fourth, families do not visit as often when their elderly family member is in a nursing home, cause they think they are in good enough hands to be left alone there. I will never send anyone in my family to one. I will fight tooth and nail as well. I have worked in a nursing home and I did not like what I saw. It was sickening.

Answer 4

Imagine being told you can't live where you want anymore so you have to go live with a group of people, abide by their rules and other people are going to make your decisions for you. It's a very difficult adjustment.

Most of the fear and reluctance comes from myths and stories and not the actual truth - but it's hard to leave the home where you raised your family and is full of memories.

Home health care is a viable option to nursing home placement and more and more seniors are choosing to live at home as long as possible with the assistance of a home nurse aide or other care.

Answer 5

If you ever get the chance to visit one please do. You will notice how nice and clean it looks and how happy the residents are, but when you visit the rooms that they do not allow you to see you will see a completely different story. Plus, with all of the news stories on nursing homes, it makes it very hard to find somewhere to put someone you love into a home that you know they will be safe. Take it from me, I have worked in five and quit all five due to the things I have seen happen there.

Answer 6

There are a lot of stories about nursing home neglect and mistreatment. Also it is hard for people to admit they can't take care of themselves and that they are getting old. Plus being in a nursing home is like a hospital. Who wants to live in a hospital?

I worked with a lady whose mom was in a nursing home. Because of negligence on the nursing home staff her mom fell and broke her hip which in result caused her death and there was medical records to prove that.

Answer 7

I've seen shows like 20/20 about the abuse and neglect at nursing homes, and I've read articles about it. I've also visited one with my choir and the living conditions made me a bit sick to my stomach. It's so sad. But I'm sure there are great homes out there. I think for the most part is that they fear they will be dropped off there and forgotten.... I'd feel the same way. You may have friends there your "own age", but it's still a bit lonely without your loved ones there.

Answer 8

There are most definitely bad nursing homes, but there are good ones as well. I think the elderly hate going to nursing homes because they must feel as though they are being cast aside, unwanted and useless. Also, they are most likely going to die in a nursing home. It's gotta be scary, going to live somewhere you know is going to be the last place you live in.

Answer 9

Some nursing homes are evil. To me nursing homes are like concentration camps for old people. Families and the government should do their best to take care of their elders.

Answer 10

Wow, to mention this sounds demanding isn't the phrase! All of your existence, you've felt dependable to your Mum. As you assert, you've a accomplice and a existence and no person will have to give up you residing this. I quite consider to your mum as it is noticeable that she has many problems, however in all this time, your efforts have now not converted the quandary (Although I ought to say you've performed quite good and attempted very difficult with this!). It turns out like your mum's problems are preventing her from seeing the matters that you just DO do for her and it's now anything she expects, and extra. There has to return a time while you give up feeling dependable for her most likely. To be sincere, you've been making an attempt for see you later and no person turns out an happier for it do they? Without sounding imply, your mum does sound very manipulative and if this performs at the heartstrings of the men and women who care approximately her, then she is going to push it. I recognise it's going to be difficult, however simply take a step again. Be sincere however very company together with her and simply give an explanation for that you've attempted your fine and it does not look to be operating. Tell her that it's unreasonable to assume you to transport in together with her, certainly as you've a accomplice and a lifetime of your possess and in addition the truth that something you've attempted she has now not been joyful with besides. If she kicks up a fuss, simply stay calm and keep on with what you're announcing and MEAN it. The reality her psych workforce have picked up on the truth that her behaviour is concentration searching for undoubtedly offers you much more purpose to appreciate your emotions aren't unfounded. I want you the fine of good fortune. D

Answer 11

It is (and correctly so, I believe) perceived as giving up of one's freedom. Once you check into a nursing home, you're not really free to go as you please. You basically relinquish control to the staff of the nursing home, which in many cases, is underpaid, understaffed, and doesn't give a rat's rump about the patients.

My 97 year old great grandmother refused to go to a nursing home because "nursing homes are for old people." She died, five years later, at age 102, in her home.