Can't stop Crying!!!!?

Question

My husband woke my 11yr old son up spanking him because he went to bed with his TV on! It PISSED me off and I told him about it! He replied "if I didn't like the way he was doing things around the house I could pack my SH--! It is really bothered me for him to do that! We have a daughter 7 that is biologically his and he would never do her like that! She always leaves her TV on! I guess she was lucky not to forget! But would he have done that if they both left them on! I just couldn't sleep; so I got in the bed with my daughter, and cried myself to sleep! I went in the room with my son and told him that should not have happened to him and I was so sorry and I love him! I have been crying all morning at work because I just can't get myself together! I have turned my kids TV's off hundreds of times. But you would have to be a MONSTER to wake someone up like that! He was incoherent and didn't know what was going on! I FELT SO SORRY FOR HIM! Can't stop crying!

Answer 1

Your husband has issues with anger and probably needs therapy or lots of prayer.

Answer 2

like you said: 'It takes a monster to wake someone up like that!'
And as someone mentioned, think about what he does at home when you are not there. You need to think about your children especially your son. Alot of men will say that they accept your other child but in turn when they have their own, they become jealous of the other child. What I mean by that is he is afraid that you will give your child more attention than you would the daughter that belongs to the both of you. I hope there is not a next time but if it is, go to your son's room & cry while holding him. This way your son knows your support him & know that what his stepdad done was wrong.

Answer 3

Man - sometimes these guys can suck. My husband and I had my first son (previous marriage) and he treated him totally different than he treated our son together. He used to go up and slap my older son on the back of the head if he forgot to do something or whatever reason. It was rough. I would get on him about it (privately) and he did try to calm it down but it sounds like your husband doesn't feel he's done anything wrong when he DID do something wrong. Adults fall asleep with the tv on - they don't use that much electricity if that is his problem. I think I'd get out of there personally though - only because it could just get worse and you NEED TO PROTECT YOUR CHILDREN. That is your job. Try a shelter or something when you can get out. I consider that child abuse to be honest with you.

Answer 4

I can see this is a tit for tat grudge match and your ex is screwing with you to make life as difficult as she can. I kind of remember your questions about this before. The problem is that CPS has a job to do and they have to follow up each allegation one by one. They are part of the government so it's all very procedural stuff they're doing. About all you can do at the moment is continue what you've already been doing and that's to stick to your guns, tell the truth and let them sort it out. One thing that can help you is having evidence to back up your version of events. I know this is a pain but you need to get yourself a cheap digital camera that records the date and time on the photo and actually photograph your daughter in appropriate underwear or swimsuit each day so that you have daily photographic evidence of her skin condition (bruises or no bruises etc). Make this offer to CPS to let them know you are serious about your concerns. That way, CPS has your photographic evidence on their files and can compare your ex's statements against the photographs. The idea is to stitch her up as a liar and get the CPS off your back. Good luck with it all :)

Answer 5

Poor baby! I'm sure your son was really confused by that!

You need to sit down with your husband and make sure the two of you agree on the rules of the house as well as the consequences. If the two of you can't come to an agreement you might want to seek marital and/or family counseling. He obviously has some anger issues to work out if something like the TV being left on set him off like that. Feel free to email me if you need someone to talk to. Good luck, sweetie!

Answer 6

I think waking him up and spanking was harsh for leaving his TV on. There's way more serious things to address than that. It is important to remember to turn things off but that was an extreme punishment. Maybe you should talk to him later on today and let him know you agree that he needs to turn the TV off and maybe a different approach can be taken if it happens again. This kind of treatment breeds contempt and unhappiness with children.

Answer 7

I lived like this for 12 years. My husband unreasonably punished my kids and was non-compassionate. My kids are still furious at me for subjecting them to this. And they are in their early 20's. I stayed with the guy too long. I should not have allowed him to be so unreasonable with my children. But i was afraid to be alone and he helped me with all the responsibility of the children. This is a serious problem. What kind of a mother would allow her son to be treated that way. That's what my kids say to me. Of course the girl does not face such treatment. Only the older step-son. And you know it. Is there any way the boy can go live with his father? That is one good solution to the problem. Another is try to get your hubby to understand that he can only discipline your son with your approval...but in the long term it's hard to get that to work. Cuz your hubby feels he has authority over your house. The only other way is to somehow get them apart. I'm sorry about this. It broke my heart and ruined my life and i am crying as i write this. I can tell you that protecting your kids is your responsibility. You are responsible for what happens to your son and you can control it (he will know you could have stopped it by leaving the guy who was treating him that way). You are strong.

Answer 8

First you need to hold your son and remind him he is completely innocent then you need to tell your husband to keep his hands to himself he is a monster! I am a survivor of past abuse I lived every form of it for twenty-nine years and though the tears may stop the emotional scras are embedded forever now. Your son did not deserve to have that happen, a reminder to shut the television off perhaps a week with no television but to physically harm a child is unspeakable! My advice, leave your husband and take your kids until he seeks professional help he needs it and your kids especially your son needs to feel as if he is in a safe, warm and loving home not a haven of fear!!!!

Answer 9

Does your husband consistantly show this type of behaviour towards your son?If the answer is yes then your son is the victim of emotional and physical abuse .If you can't stop your husband's behaviour I would be fearful that this violence will escalate. You owe it to your son to allow him to feel safe in his home. By the way your husband is a monster! What would he think if you waited until he was asleep and then beat on him....I think we know his reaction. The difference is your son as a child doen't have the ability to defend himself.If it happens again call the police and get him on domestic abuse or child abuse.

Answer 10

call the police and they will make him pack his sh!t and if you don't call the police and they find out about the abuse and you did nothing to prevent it or stop it then you could be found guilty as an accomplice and just so you know I'm am reporting this as abuse in hopes that the police will be notified by yahoo keep in mind this is a computer and im sure they have ways to figure out who you are after all you had to register with yahoo right
PS i just read the rest of your questions and you really need to get rid of him all you need to do is call 911 when they get there tell them every thing also tell them your afraid of him ask for a list of resources for domestic violence if you play your card right you'll get the house he'll go to jail and when he gets out he'll have to pay you child support you have lots of options don't be a fool you said you want to leave him then do before your child is dead and you and your husband are in jail

Answer 11

If he would not do it to your daughter he is treating them unfairly. I think your husband might have an angry problem. Ask him to seek counseling. I myself if this happened would like to say that I would wake the kids and start packing and go somewhere. It will only get worse and you don't know who is next on his list. Next time he might beat your son and send him to the hospital or he might never do it again. The question is do you want to wait around to see?