why are long distance relationships so hard?

Question

I'm overseas and my boyfriend is in the states.

Answer 1

because they never ment ot be or work out, but good luck girl. :)

Answer 2

Several reasons

Firstly, communication can be difficult and that's very important in relationships. Often you have to settle for telephone or internet chats and it's not possible to see body language. Some people find it hard to speak intimately any way other than face to face.


Secondly, absence makes the heart grow fonder. When somebody is far away and you see them intermittantly when you are together everything seems rosy and perfect. When they are away you idealise them and the time you spend with them. This can make for an unrealistic expectation. When you finally end up living with this person, should it go that far, their faults and annoying habits can seem more prominant.

Thirdly, a LDR can not last forever, something has got to give if it is to progess. That means that one or both people must compromise. leave their friends, family job...home...in order to make the relationship work in the long term. This presents more obstacles that can compound into greater problems. not only will you have a new life situation, and a new person to live with..but you are also potentially leaving behind a support network of friends and family which can lead to stress and upset.

There are many things to consider, but if both parties want it to work badly enough...it will succeed. All relationships require hard work, but LDRs require that little bit extra I'd say.

S
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Answer 3

Long distance relationships are hard because neither of you know what the other is really getting up to, okay sure you may call each other everyday but the truth may never be said.
The fact is if you were together in the same place to begin with and then you had to move away you would have decided what was best and if carrying on your relationship was what you both wanted to do then fine, but if you had a choice of leaving then obviously he never really meant anything to you if you decided to leave.

Do what you think is best

Answer 4

I'm in one myself and it is tough as we only get to see each other every 2-3 weeks at the moment for a few days, I miss like crazy and long for the closeness, we're determined to make it work however as we really love each other very much, we plan to save up and buy a place together within the next 12 months so it wont be torture for too long - it can work out but you have to be commited and be willing to compromise

Answer 5

I'm in one rite now, in fact in my last 7 years of this amazing relationship we have been apart for almost 3-3.5years. And the last time I was with him was 1year and 2months back. I in far east Asia and he's in the US...so a time gap of exact 12 hours :)

I know with all the talks about physical intimacy, difficulty in communication, longing for partner, and many more things written here but believe me the memories of our togetherness and the anticipation of our meeting keeps a passion burning inside always. Sometimes when we argue and keep the phone down on the other its scary as we dont have any way of hugging, kissing and making up.

Huge amount of Trust , loads of love in our heart and Hope for a beautiful togetherness keeps us going...Hope these stay with you too.

Best of luck!!!

Answer 6

They are difficult, especially for men, because physical intimacy is an important component of how men bond with a woman and deepen their love for her. If your relationship was well grounded and committed before the separation, it is highly possible that it can sustain LD for an extended period. However, if the foundation of love and commitment was not there, the LD will create an additional strain.

Answer 7

Oh there are so many reasons to name why it's hard but the one major one I would say the most is no contact. Hearing the persons voice is comforting but there is nothing absolutely NOTHING like physical contact between two people who love another. If you make it through this, your bond will be so much stronger, good luck.

Answer 8

Long-distance relationships demand a lot of trust and commitment.

Answer 9

Because people crave physical affection. All the words in the world never feel as good as being able to look into someones eyes, or hug them, or kiss them, etc. But if your love was strong enough before he left you CAN make it work.

Answer 10

i started one knowing ,the best thing wil work is having agood friend only, which ended up happening. some do work with alot work, phone calling and takeing turns seeing each other, but sooner or later one you got make desion on moving,this when things get hard and things can fall apart

Answer 11

They are hard because you can't see the person and if there is a lack of trust, you will always be worried about what he is doing. They are very difficult. Keep your chin up.