i have a friend who i havent seen for a few years. i saw her a couple months ago and she is very different now. ive seen her several times since then and she acts very different and dresses different. now i know people change. but she went from being someone who was always a lady in the way she dressed and acted. to dressing in very tight clothes and wearing make-up that makes her look, for lack of a better word, cheap. i care about this woman alot. and im kinda worried that shes going to start attracting the wrong kind of guy. shes 34 and has a son. shes always been so responsible and sutch a lady. but now she acts like someone that she isnt. does she think she has to do this to attract a man? is there anyway i can talk to her about this without hurting her feelings? please help!!!
2006-06-06 22:48:13 · 14 answers · asked by mscmkr06 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Try to believe that she knows what she is doing. She just might!
We all go through changes and hers obviously suit her right now. She may be wanting to attract the wrong kind of guy, or maybe the kind of guy she is attracting is not wrong to anyone but you?
Ease up. Let her live her life. Does she tell you that you dress in a fashion that she doesn't approve of? Then leave her alone! Be her friend and not her nurse maid.
Additional:
Ah ha. I just read another of your questions. You are male and it would seem that you are also in love with this woman. That puts an entirely new spin on this question. And I am not sure how to answer!
Does she return your feelings? If not, your concern may be mostly seen to be jealousy and would not be appreciated by her. Also, as a woman I can tell you that a man who pursues too aggressively will send me in the opposite direction. I like knowing that a man is interested, but I want to be able to reach out as well. If you are doing all the reaching you are not allowing her a chance to show you how she feels. Just be her friend. If there is more there on her part she will find a way to let you know.
2006-06-06 23:05:56 · answer #1 · answered by Batty 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I wish I knew if you were a guy or girl here.. It makes a difference I think. If a guy (and I am guessing you are for some reason.. I don't know) you dated her then? A girl wouldn't care as much about someone acting a 'hoochie mama.' (It's competition time.) I don't personally think that dressing a hoochie is gonna make you act hoochie you know.. She's sending out 'bad vibes' for being one too I am guessing. It IS weird, you are right. Can you find out what ya missed or what she's been doing when you were out of touch? She got the idea somewhere along the line that she wasn't good enough (and is out to attract someone, that is very evident.) She can't be dressing this way for like work then? Is she running around like bars, bad spots? If so I'd worry plenty too! It is hard to criticize (the pits) someone for what they look like. She thinks she is acting 'sexy' and this will get someone when in fact you are getting the impression she is prostituting herself somewhat. Can you and she go somewhere where a respectable dress is 'mandatory?' and then comment over and over again how truly 'beautiful.. desirable..' (like I said depends on whether you are m/f for what you say)?? This is the best I can come up w.. g'luck later melancholia
2006-06-06 22:56:20 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I had a friend who had something close to this going on herself...her thing was......she was with this guy who was verbally abusive to her...he constantly put her down...& made her look like a fool...when she finally got away from him....she was so beat down..she think she was worth anything at all....so she started changing....wearing the tight clothes...the trashy makeup...going out all the time....she said it made her feel sexy....after about 6 mo's of this & almost getting raped by someone she met in a club....she went back to the way she was before she met the dead beat.....is there a chance your friend might have had a similer situation?.....I would just talk to her....tell her your feelings...& your concerns.....be a friend....tell her you miss the "old" & your really worried about the "new".....BUT...make sure you tell her that you still care no matter which look & attitude she decides to keep.....GOOD LUCK!
2006-06-06 22:56:31 · answer #3 · answered by mysticfairy74 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's really no way to tell her without hurting her feelings. She is taking the images on television and applying them to her own life. 34 years old is not the age to start dressing like a hooker. May be you should try dressing out of character and if she asks why did you start dressing this way you say "I was going to ask you the same thing." Then you can begin to tell her how you feel.
2006-06-06 22:54:14 · answer #4 · answered by TheUrbanIntellectual 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
some are and some are not. achievable't make a blanket statement about all women of any race. elegance is carefully subjective and contained in the interest of the beholder. lots of the individuals indexed less than are being very stereotypical, even those who're being complimentary. All black women don't have wide noses or thick lips or a similar texture of hair or gleaming pores and skin or enormous butts or perhaps darkish pores and skin. the vast majority of black individuals are blended race even if or not they don't look to you - it truly is the clarification why maximum black individuals do not look like Africans. i do not comprehend what women those who've spoken on own hygiene are putting round yet perhaps you want to come across a extra effectual classification of individuals to go jointly with.
2016-11-14 07:45:32 · answer #5 · answered by cathell 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
hey look she is obviously CHOOSING to dress this way so let her be.. no-one tells you how to dress.. maybe you can say hey what happened to your old look? get to know her reasons if she feels like sharing them with you.. for example what may seem cheap to you may seem sexy to her its all subjective ... talk to her if you really want to but its her choice at the end of the day... respect it its only clothes!!
Oh and your qn asks why would a woman do this.. well you cant generalise there is no way of knowing expect by asking her if u really want to know and respect her wishes...
2006-06-06 22:58:19 · answer #6 · answered by lazydazy 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think it is best to talk about what you like about her not the changes and try to involve her in things you dont go to dressed that way. She is probably lonely and reaching out for help.
Good Luck and God Bless!!
2006-06-06 22:52:25 · answer #7 · answered by msqtech 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
She's definitely dealing with self esteem issues. Be a friend and talk to her. Don't try to change her mind. Just see what's on her mind, and be there for her. Model good behavior without imposing your values on her...she might come around.
2006-06-06 22:51:12 · answer #8 · answered by stacey 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Before u judge her find out about the time when u didnt see her ..find what happened to her in that period and why she is acting the way she is...
2006-06-06 22:53:19 · answer #9 · answered by gentle_cute_man 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
some people feel like they didnt really enjoy there young life and later on in life deside to live it to the fullest.let her be she most likely attract the wrong people but shes a grown women and she know wat she want u dont have to hold her hand on everthing
2006-06-06 22:54:15 · answer #10 · answered by Soldi3r23 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋