What is the most polite way to handle this? Outside of closing my eyes and pretending. That isn't an option. So, how can I respect myself and them at the same time?
2006-06-06 16:41:49 · 49 answers · asked by Ive got several... 3 in Society & Culture ➔ Etiquette
Sit silently, will it kill you?
Build a bridge and get over it!
2006-06-06 23:19:22 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 11⤊ 1⤋
When in Rome, do as the Romans do. Even if you don't have the same beliefs, respect the house you are visiting. Pretend you are in a foreign country: it is vital to practice the customs of the country you are visiting.
During prayer, bow your head and:
1.) Think about what you're going to do the next day
2.) Write a poem in your head
3.) Count how many socks are missing in your laundry pile
4.) Visualize your new car
5.) Think of the 5 things you would absolutely need on a desert island.
6.) Stare at your hands and remind yourself to get a manicure ASAP
7.) Memorize the carpet pattern
8.) Peek at the other people praying
9.) Be thankful in general, for anything, it doesn't have to be a prayer, it can just be a kind thought.
10.) Remember that you don't have to believe in it, but you do have to go through the motions of it if you are a guest in someone's home.
2006-06-06 20:32:30 · answer #2 · answered by jpi5 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Just pretend. There's a huge difference between respecting someone's religion and converting to it. Saying grace because it means something to someone else doesn't make you a bad athist, it makes you a good person. I'm an atheist too, but I still think religion is important because it means a lot to other people. Even though it's bad in the sense that it's not true, it's still a powerful force in society, and not everything associated with it is bad. It's not just about God, it's also about tradition, community, morality, and a lot of other things.
If your an atheist, that means you don't believe in God. Therefore saying grace or whatever isn't against your religion in any way because there is no higher being for it to be offensive to. By pretending to say grace with them, and respecting their religion, you're not disrespecting your own relgion in any way. If you care enough about them to go over to dinner at their house, you should also care enough about them to respect their tradition even if it doesn't mean to you what it means to them. Think about religion from a secular, sociological perspective and you can still participate in religious customs and rituals without compromising your religion at all.
2006-06-06 16:50:21 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think if you are in someone's home then you should respect what they believe. Don't get me wrong, I'm not saying that you need to agree with them, just respect the fact that they want to pray before dinner. I think just sitting there quietly (you don't need to bow your head or close your eyes) until they are done is a good compromise. You shouldn't make a huge deal of it, but if they are praying then they shouldn't been looking around to see who has their head down. My grandparents pray before they eat and if I eat at there house thats what I do. I think it would be rude to start eating before they were done praying so as long as you can sit still for about one minute you should be fine.
2006-06-06 16:50:20 · answer #4 · answered by NJ 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
oh this is a sticky situation.Before going to thier house for dinner explain to them ur not comfterable with prayer due to religious differnces..If they are true "christans"< who are supposed to be kind and understanding>. They will understand , and atleastrepspect u enough to let u leave the room u to step out of the room if u absolutly must...but on the other hand the polite thing to do would be to jsut have ur own silent moment or something think of something off the wall or anything u enjoy
2006-06-06 16:48:08 · answer #5 · answered by Lilmisssassy 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If they say grace you don't have to. Your only options are to verbally excuse yourself with an explanation or to sit quietly and wait for it to be over. Your not pretending your just sitting there. If they are praying like most Christians there heads will be bowed and their eyes closed.
2006-06-06 16:46:52 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sit quietly, and think of something else while they prey, then after they are done continue with the dinner like if nothing happened. Definetly dont walk away from the table or say something smart allecky, that would be rude. you dont want to ruin the night. So what you believedifferent things it really is not a big deal. Enjoy your dinner.
2006-06-06 16:49:10 · answer #7 · answered by Nena_555 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
My friend is atheist also, he has been to my home many times and we are catholic. He just bows his head in respect for my family. When we are invited over to his home for dinner we do not say grace and we are respecting his wishes and views.
2006-06-06 19:06:01 · answer #8 · answered by Mrs. Mac 4 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
When in rome do as the romans do If you accept an invitation where you know that grace will be said, then you are part of that group for that function.Anything other than polite agreement is hypocrirical
2006-06-06 17:01:41 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would let them know that, although you respect them and their customs, you do not hold to the same ones. Therefore, you will not be joining them by closing your eyes and pretending.
They may decide to not say a blessing at all, or simply agree that it will be perfectly acceptable for you to not join them in their blessing.
Being honest with others is an admirable quality.
2006-06-06 21:51:14 · answer #10 · answered by rocketscientist 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Out of respect I would remain quiet while they are praying because even if you believe or not it is important to respect others especially in their own homes. There is nothing wrong with being silent and listening to someone say grace.
2006-06-06 17:31:48 · answer #11 · answered by nygirl 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋