My mother in law is a troublemaker?

Question

My mother in law, for years, has been making my life miserable. I've vented to my mother telling her everything she's done. My mother has seen me cry and get upset over this and couldn't take it any longer. Recently, my mother talked to my mother in law about everything that has happened in the past 5 years and told her that if she makes my daughter (me) upset, she's going to "come after her" and see her again. My mother in law asked her if that was a threat and my mother said to "take it however you want". Now, it has become a fight between my husband and I...when it really doesn't involve us. He is upset that my mother would threaten his mother and think that my mother is causing a "war"...when he should realize all the crap I've taken. My mother has never liked his mother but was always cordial to her...to keep the peace. Now I feel that my husband and I are caught in the middle with me defending my parents and him defending his mother. I really don't know what to do....

Answer 1

I understand what you're going through. I let my mother-in-law ruin my marriage of 15 years. We actually got divorced when she came to live with us for the winter.

The best thing you can do is avoid her like the plague. Stay away from her for awhile. Keep her out of your marriage before it's too late. Allow your husband to have a relationship with her, but you keep out. It's not good for your mental health.

You could try counseling with your husband. And prayer always works. Pray for her that God will put some miles between you and her until things settle down. Good Luck! .....)(

Answer 2

I went through something similiar. This is going to be weird but my husband hadn't lived around his mom for about 10 years, so when she moved closer to us he realized she was a different person than what he remembered. To make a long story short she acted as if she was his mistress and would say "let's go to lunch" but don't tell your wife, and he listened to her the first time until he told me what she said. Anyway she kept doing things like that wanting a lot of attention, inviting my husband to things but not me, and going so far as to pretending to be pregnant at 51 because at the time I was pregnant. My husband and I would fight everyday about it and it almost ruined our marriage, he never did anything about it until he realized his mother was lying. After that she caught me on a really bad day and I lit her *** up and said everything I had been wanting and more than I should have. I also explained to her that her son had a family now and we do things as a family, needless to say it has never happened again, were really cool now, sometimes you can't go the nice role you have to be straight up

Answer 3

Have it out with your mother in law. Sit down and have a long talk. Let her know what she has done to you emotionally. Make sure your husband is there to mediate. That's what i did, and we couldn't be happier. Then let your mom have it out with her. Get everything out in the open, then resolve it. You may have said a few things that hurt her without realizing it. You never know.

Answer 4

You shouldn't have involved your mother. You should have talked to your mother in law about how you felt. In a respectful way. If she continued to make your life miserable, I would just have as little to do with her as possible.

Answer 5

Keep your mouth shut and ask your mom to apologize.

Then FOREVER limit conversations and interactions with mother in law.Keep it short.Treat it like bussiness, not family.

Then stop discussing the problems with your mom

and finally dont complain to your husband about his mom.
His mother will never change and she will forever be a biatch to you.
BUT you dont have to buy into her junk.
If you keep things in neutral territoryit helps to. Like meeting at a restaurant if you have to do lunch or a bday.

And a s far trying to discuss things with your m.in law its a waste of time, she knows what shes up to and will probably act like its all in your head.

YOU CANT MAKE SENSE OF CRAZY!

Answer 6

what do u expect when you keep crying to your mother? where's your husband in this ? what's his stand? is he happy that his mother making you miserable...he should be the one to defend you from his mother not your own mother!!

Answer 7

Take my advice, stand up for yourself and officially sever ties with your mother-in-law.

Answer 8

Want her whacked? I know a guy. He'll do it for a lawnmower.

Answer 9

tell her whats on your mine