My wife went out to pay some bills and go shopping with my sister in law today. they went to the mall.... well after shopping for a bit my wife grabbed her purse and went to the restroom. the only problym is that when she left the restroom she left her purse. ok heres where my question comes in.. some one picked up her purse and took off with it. so everything we had money wise is gone. flat broke no big deal i can make more money....
social security cards gone... no big deal can get new ones.
drivers licence gone .. same there.
keys same here.
but there was one thing that was irriplacible. she had a 1981 half dollar in her purse that her dad gave her when he addopted her in her purse. well i was collecting change and there was another 1981 half sitting there. i told her that it was the one that her dad gave her and that i picked it up yesterday when my 1 year old spilt her purse. she was so happy and excited that she still had it...
Is this wrong? it means so much to her???
2006-06-06 14:11:58 · 64 answers · asked by vw_72camper 3 in Health ➔ Mental Health
yes goldwing i love her very much
2006-06-06 14:16:16 · update #1
Not at all. It sounds like you're a level headed person, and that you really love your wife and want her to be happy. You've done so much more than others in your position might do. If I'd had a hat on, I'd tip it to you! You're a class act!
2006-06-06 14:14:42 · answer #1 · answered by SolMan 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Morally I suppose it is wrong. But seeing how much it meant to her I think you have made her happy. As long as you can live with the fact that you lied to her - and as long as you appreciate that one-day she could find out the truth (which would cause more problems). It’s a tough call. The thing is that the money made her happy for sentimental reasons. If it was a $1000 dollar note then it could be replaced (if you had the money) and she would still be happy. However, this was important to her because of sentimental reasons - it is close to her because it holds strong memories. What is really important to her is the memory, but the note is a token of that - and she would be devastated to have lost it. I think it is ok that she doesn't know about, considering she still has the memories and is quite content with that. Either way, its tricky! Good luck. xx
2006-06-06 14:20:57 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think what you did was very kind and if she were to find out I believe that if she really thought it through she would realize how much you love her besides now that she thinks the half dollar she has is the same one this one can mean just a little more because you gave it to her when she thought it was lost, kind of a little higher rating in the sentimental scale. On the other hand I can not stress enough to get locks changed and report the loss to the cops in case the snatcher does anything with hers or your identity info.
2006-06-08 11:50:46 · answer #3 · answered by okigotitalready 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I don't think it was wrong. See it wasn't the half dollar that meant so much, it was the idea that it represented. So, you have not really done anything wrong. This really is one those times where what she doesn't know won't hurt her. Besides, you have also spared her the guilt of being the one who lost it. That would make her feel worse than if she had found out that you gave her a different coin. I think I shows how much you really care for her. She is very lucky.
2006-06-06 14:20:38 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well, your wife might be upset at the deceit if she finds out, but I think, like the rest of us, she could see that you were trying to make her feel better regarding her loss. You definitely take a chance anytime you outright lie to people, even when done with the best of intentions. It's hard to gauge how a person will react, I would think that it was romantic that my husband wanted to fix it, but I know other women who would be livid. You know your wife, we don't...how do you think she would react? How have you felt since then (like you've done wrong or relieved that her mind is at ease again)?
It seems like since you're searching for approval on internet that you have some nagging doubts about it. You're only options at t his point are come clean and rid yourself of any guilt you may feel (but face up to the consequences) or stick to your story. The real question is what will make her feel better?
2006-06-06 14:40:58 · answer #5 · answered by Rebecca YZ 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
helllllllllllllllll no its not wrong you did the right thing the only mistake would be telling her what you did sometime in the next few years unless for w/e reason she gets her purse back and finds the new coin
( my wallet was stolen today ironically and im not to worried about the stuff u mentioned but i had a list of phone numbers in there i'd really like to have back )
2006-06-06 14:16:48 · answer #6 · answered by staterules9 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I know you're feeling guilty but that's b/c you're an honest person and don't like the fact that you feel like you've deceived her. Or partly b/c you did something selfless and feel good about how good she felt and want to share that act with your best friend (your wife). But I really don't think you should tell her. It would undo all the happiness she feels. And the hard part for you is to just not to think about it. Know that you made her so relieved and keep the truth to yourself. It's not wrong.
2006-06-06 14:18:17 · answer #7 · answered by Chloegirl7 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The point is, she thinks it is the one that her dad gave her. That is what makes it special to her. Your little fib is one that doesn't cause harm to anyone, and it brings her some happiness. I think that you are a good husband to have done that for her. She will never even know, which makes it that much sweeter. You are absolutely right, let her think that it is that one. I would be devastated as well, as I am very close to my parents, and that would be the worst thing about losing it.
2006-06-06 14:17:37 · answer #8 · answered by clovicat 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Tough one... you've lied to her, albeit to alleviate her pain. Some might take offense at the lie itself, others would see beyond to the bigger picture, you love her and only want to make her happy again. Any way you slice it, don't tell her the truth after the fact unless you absolutely have to come clean, i.e. she notices some small difference or the bag shows back up. Good luck.
2006-06-06 14:22:35 · answer #9 · answered by buzzy 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No, not at the moment it's not wrong. Sometimes we have to tell a small lie so the person can deal with the devastation's in our life. I would hope that someday soon you do tell her the truth. As you know it's not good to lie or keep secrets from one another.
2006-06-12 08:55:48 · answer #10 · answered by teambargain 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋