All too often I read the solutions that people have given to people having problems with their kids. Most of the answers are great but I see some answers that involve abuse of the kids by threatening abuse or shaming the child. I was just wondering if anyone out there still used this form of "disapline"? Also, what anyone else had to say on the matter. Thanks...
2006-06-06 11:40:12 · 14 answers · asked by skattered0077 5 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Parenting
I fully agree with you! I answer many parenting questions and so many people believe in spanking and shaming. I even feel time outs are shaming and a form of punishment, not discipline. A time out is the parent controlling the child and only causes resentment, anger, and it is shaming. I would rather a child learn self-control. Many parents confuse discipline and punishment. Parents should think about how they would respond or want to be treated when they, as spouses, do something their spouse does not like. Would calling him or her some four letter word work? Would hitting him or her work? Would putting him or her in a time out (1 minute for every year as age :)) work? If you want them to be afraid of you or feel shamed then yes. If you want to solve a problem, then no. It's sad that so many feel that punishment is beneficial.
2006-06-06 13:31:53 · answer #1 · answered by marnonyahoo 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Trust me that's not the way to parent kids. I've seen kids who have been subjected to this and they turn angry, rebellious, defiant and more often than not addicted to drugs/alcohol and acts of delinquency. It doesn't work and turn the kids against the parent. I believe that oyu should parent your kid in a relaxed manner and allow them to make a lot of their own decisions and give them responsibility from an early age. That way they grow into adults and can make their mistakes when they are young and still protected by the law and their parents. They also learn to take responsibility and to be their own person. It would prevent aimless kids who can't decide if they are an adult or a child so they end up accomplishing nothing. Thats how i see it as a 17 year old who was raised in a mildly strict household
2006-06-06 11:48:19 · answer #2 · answered by barbieisagoddess 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sometimes shaming has its place, like, for example, when a child shoplifts something. I'm thinking that a personal apology to the store manager would be shaming. Otherwise, no. And never belittling, unless your child is UNJUSTLY proud (like looking down on those less financially well off). I always try to encourage my kids when they have done their best, even if their best fails.
2006-06-06 12:36:03 · answer #3 · answered by rb42redsuns 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i think this form of "discipline" is absolutely wrong. Those who still use this as discipline may do so because they honestly don't know any other way, maybe they were raised that way themselves and dont know any better, either that or they are morons and shouldnt be allowed to have children, people should need a liscence to have children.
2006-06-06 11:46:03 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Human bodies are created, of course. it is obvious to everybody who's conscious what the words "mom" and "father" advise. Human bodies are created by ability of till now latest human bodies This, in certainty, applies to all typical modern residing beings. some basically desire one "determine", of course, while others desire 2. it works slightly in a diverse way for viruses, even yet it particularly is a controversy of discussion as to whether those stay or no longer.
2016-10-30 08:12:23 · answer #5 · answered by belschner 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No do not talk down to them it is abusive verbally
Try good old fashion Beatings that lights them up
2006-06-06 11:47:24 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
No way! That can cause more damage than spanking in my opinion! I beleive in the it is none of your business approach if another of my kids asks why one is in trouble. I will spank my kids if necessary, but not in front of other people, or even in front of their siblings.
2006-06-06 12:32:39 · answer #7 · answered by momx4 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No it serves no purpose whatsoever there are all sorts of different methods that can be used without resorting to that type of so called discipline,
2006-06-06 11:52:06 · answer #8 · answered by okayalder62 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
nononononono the law may not agree, but i believe from personal experience that shame and degradation are just as destructive as beating. it is so easy to make another human being believe badly of themselves.. to this day i can't make myself believe i deserve to be happy...
2006-06-06 11:48:16 · answer #9 · answered by sheepherder 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Absolutely not. This type of discipline would be very damaging to a child, mentally and emotionally.
2006-06-06 11:43:37 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋