How can I get my girlfriend to do stuff with me...?

Question

I'm her first boyfriend, and she has never done anything with a guy. Nothing, not even a kiss.

I am like the total opposite of her... I've been to third, and a small peck is no biggie to me. It's come up many times, but she just don't wanna kiss me. I've tried initiating it, but she'll avoid it...

She says how I don't understand her... and that it's such a big decision, because "she can't go back" and "she's never done something like that." However, at the same time, she also says how she "loves me" or likes me a lott. But then I feel, why not just do it?

We've been "going out" for about a month... and idk if I can go through with it. She's the first person I've felt something more than sex for. Like usually I'm just like "yum, she's hot, I wanna do stuff with her."

I've talked to her about it many times, and she's thought about it many times... But still, she's "confused."

Does she really like me? A peck ain't that big'a deal if we're bf and gf... what do I do? I like.. need it

BTW, we're both 16.

Answer 1

It may work between you, or not.
Probably she doesn't really know what she likes then... if she hasn't had anything with guys yet.
Of course, she is afraid.
A woman always needs to be emotionally 100% safe to be able to melt up in physical contact.
However, don't be sad... some girls do have sex with a lot of guys and they still don't know what they like or what they want!
She is a treasure, take care of her.
Show her you love her, that you love her truly and you will not run away after sex... and then she will react.

Don't ASK her next time if you may kiss her or not!
Start playing with her hair, for example... or stare at her lips - and KISS her, humm! :-) Take her by surprise. Or, ask her to close her eyes, simply.
And no comment, after the kiss.

Next time, kiss her again.
Next time, you can do even more.
Don't hurry her, cause if you do, she will run away.
Keep her close to yourself, hug her... make her get used to physical contact. She may feel extremely shy, you will have to be patient.

But, if you love her truly, this should not be a problem! :-)
Good luck!

Answer 2

Well, maybe she's just afraid of what's going to happen after you kiss. If you love her or like her or respect her then you should respect her decision that she doesn't want to kiss you. The time will come when its ready. I know that you've been with other people and you hate waiting but sometimes you have to give it time and let everything fall into place. Being her first is probably scary to her and she probably wants to maintain her innocence, and she's probably even more scared that you've been with other girls. Just sit down and talk to her and tell her that you really like her and that you're willing to wait until she's ready. And if you aren't willing to wait then maybe you need to find someone who's been with other men.

Answer 3

You need to respect her wishes and accept the fact that she's just not ready for what you're going after YET. It does seem like she cares for you and sounds like ya'll were friends before you committed to one another, and that's important to base your relationship around your roots as friends. Apply your friendship to your relationship. If you chose to commit to this girl for alterior reasons, maybe you should re-analyze your situation. Do you really want a good friendship to be destroyed due to your pushiness in the situation. She needs to know that no matter what her decisions are for her body/life/self, you respect her. By you respecting her and not rushing things to happen, she'll develop more respect and trust for you. Things will all fall into place as they're supposed to. Good luck in love and life!

Answer 4

Well, you have to ask yourself some questions. Is she worth waiting for? Have you tried kissing her on her cheeks and then try moving to the lips and if she responds alright to this than you can move on to full lip action. How old are you anyway and how old is she? If you are underage give it some time be patient, Mr. Experience. Good luck!

Answer 5

Number one if you believe she has never done anything you may be wrong, she my just not want to do it with you , and if she is a genuine person then maybe you just need to ask her what she wants out of your relationship, and give her some time to open up to you as she gains your trust and understanding.

Answer 6

She is just scare and confused.You just going have to take you a small kiss or tell her you going to move on until she ready. and let her know that it not going to hurt to give you a kiss or a hug. that what a bf and gf do

Answer 7

For something like this there is nothing you can do. You just have to be patient and supportive. The time will come

Answer 8

If you really like her you will be patient with her, its new to her, don't rush her cause if u do and its good she will move on and try it with someone else. How old are you/her? If u really like her it does not matter how long it will take.

Answer 9

on the instant women are not all whiny bitches, dude. you have purely had the misfortune of a few particularly undesirable relationships. A wholesome relationship has none of those issues, regardless of your sexuality. An undesirable relationship could have any of those issues, back regardless of your sexuality.

Answer 10

the best thing to do in that situation is to just wait it out. If yiou really do like her that much you wont mind waiting until she is able to open up to you, and when she finally does it will be worth your wait.