What does God do for innocence stolen from me ?

Question

When this man raped me i lost my physical virginity. i can never look at a boy or any husband i have some day and say I gave it to him. I would love to be able to at least say I lost it in a sinful hot moment with my bf. Anything but the way it happened. I want my virginity back but thats ha ha ha thinking. But, what about my mind? It was also robbed of its virginity. I cant remember having a thought since then where it didnt stain my thinking even in the most innocent times of making out with my bf. Not even the times of teenage hormones or silly little girl kissing with a boy from my neighborhood. Am I cursed like a lepor to the land of " those girlz that were raped or have a past " ? Or to being " Ok now after the rape....kinda OK... "...still living but really dead.. I like to say he left me for dead among the dead. The soul dead that still walk around.

Answer 1

You honestly need some councilling to help you get over the violation of being raped, only then can you move on with your life and live happy.

Answer 2

You will never forget it but life will happen and it will get farther and farther behind you. It will seem smaller. I was raped when I was a virgin. It's hard. I still think about that day and want to cry. I went threw a period where i slept with a lot of men b/c I thought "I'm not a virgin any more. why does it matter" and I went threw a period where I couldn't imagine ever having sex again, and I wouldn't even take all of my clothes off to shower. Even now I can't be alone with out all doors and windows locked. You think that someday someone will do it again. Get counciling and talk about it. I never did and it's something I regret. some day you will live a normal life and it may come to mind every once in a while but it will not invade every thought every second of the day.

Answer 3

What does God have to do with it?

I think you are making important progress already - by writing about it. You are a good writer and are able to put your pain into words. Keep writing Keep writing Keep writing Keep writing Keep writing Keep writing Keep writing

And like the others said, you should see a counsellor. They will be able to help you identify your pain and deal with it.

Besides, what is virginity but an idealistic thing that is held over our heads as a way to separate these from those? Let's break down the walls. You are a beautiful person already - no one can take that away. Any boyfriend you have should love you for who you are in the present moment.

The past is dead! Regrets are chains that bind us to poor memories. You have the power to rise above this and move on.

So keep on writing about it, see a counselor, and walk tall without looking back.

Peace!

Answer 4

I am Sorry for what happened to you. I was not raped, but was almost raped by an uncle. And even though nothing happened, I still was mentally hurt for the past 5 years, and I decided to let it go. I know it's difficult for others to understand how painful sexual abuse could be, no matter what the level is. But be strong and try to compose yourself.
Think of all the wonderful things in the world, including yourself, the fresh air, the flowers... Just try to enjoy yourself and love yourself and take care of yourself. Tell yourself that you are a good person, and that you deserve to be happy.

Please decide to be free of this feeling today and know that you have God's favor because you haven't sinned. People do all sorts of bad things and they don't feel guilty, but someone did something bad and you feel guilty. It's because you are an innocent person and people like to take advantage of people like you (and me!).

What I've done is I decided to stop feeling sorry for myself, tried to be positive and started trusting and loving people again, but I'm also aware of what can happen and so I try to not get myself in situations that invite such incidents.

If you have a good friend, it's good to talk to a friend too. There is no point in blaming yourself or limiting your life for someone else's wrongdoings.
Good Luck

Answer 5

growing to be From the Tomb (or a Halloween tale with a contented ending.) Time does no longer exist each and every now is then God straddles each and every wall Cohabiting peace with soreness. My destiny MEs and previous MEs Stand mutually On a sacred straight forward to that end the previous rewritten And the steadiness Can proceed to be, If I realized no longer something  else from suffering than this one ingredient i am going to describe My soul isn't my body and no crimes  can attain my mind. What once became determined guard turns right into a bastion for the sane, and then and now do no longer exist And are one and the same.

Answer 6

Rape is defiling body, mind, and spirit. You were 12 and barely even knew what was going on. yet you felt violated, ashamed, scared, hurt, abused, angry, sad, revengeful, regretful (not that you had anything to regret) fearful, and any other emotion. He physically hurt you. Did something to you when you had no control... You need to prosecute him. When you are a minor, there is no statute of limitations. You may want to find a psychologist from a rape crisis center if you have on. If you do not have on in your town then try... 1-800-871-7741 or http://www.ibiblio.org/rcip//effectsofrape.html

Answer 7

get over it or else you ll shrivel up like a prune @ then u notice u left ur life so many lights down on a 1 way street of life
it does happen and now adays more than ever but there is help there r other women that can help don t let some small town loser end ur life for u oh yeah good luck getting ur virginity back i here they do wonders in mexico with that kind of stuff

Answer 8

Why are you punishing yourself like this? What has happened to you is very sad, and everyone's prayer is that they never experience what you have experienced. If this man is still walking free, I dont think it is too late to bring him to justice if you have the strength.
If you can't, then at least forgive yourself. We have only one chance at living and that is now, do not destroy your life because of a situation that you had no control over.
Make up with God, and make up with yourself and you will be amazed at the difference this will make. Start anew, it is never too late.
God will not change the condition of a people except the people are ready to change themselves.

Answer 9

Jesus understands pain. They took Him and beat Him spit on Him tore out His beard and then nailed Him to a cross to die. and He was completely innocent. He knows what pain is and He never opened His mouth. There is not a mortal person that can understand the pain that we carry but Jesus Christ knows and it is He alone that will heal the pain and loss you feel. People even rape victims can say that they understand but they will never truly understand your loss. But I assure you Jesus Christ knows and He loved you and I so very much.
Many times when traumatic things happen in our lives we think that there is no hope or relief the pain that we carry all we can see it what it has done to hurt us but I want to share with you there is hope. You don't have to carry that pain, the pain will consume you if you allow it to. Let go of it and allow Jesus Christ to make you whole.
The fact that Jesus Christ didn't remain in the grave but lives should tell us that He was no everyday Saviour. I am here to tell you not only does He have power over death and grave but He is able to heal our pain. No you will never forget but Jesus will make you whole again.

http://www.chick.com/information/general/salvation.asp

Answer 10

God is a God of new beginnings and restoration. He is not holding this situation against you. He loves you and is aware of the pain you are going through. God wants to turn this situation into a victory for you so you can help others who have been victimized. I have been through much abuse in my life and can truly say God has turned it around on the devil. What the devil tried to destroy me with, God is using against him. I help so many people and the pain does not eat me up anymore. I know how much He loves me. He loves you the same way. For biblical counseling, I recommend elijahhouse.org. They can point you to a counselor or a church that can help you. Bless you.