My husband and I argue a lot about day care for our son. He doesn't want to spend money on a sitter when he could have his family members watch him. But the thing is that his family is crazy. I mean literary. His sisters have been in jail and known for beating up the people in the neighborhood that they didn't like. Should this problem even matter, or should I just go with my own instinct.
2006-06-06 06:01:11 · 25 answers · asked by shonuff 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
Go with your own instinct.You may want to keep the peace by agreeing with your hubby, but if you feel your child is not in a healthy situation with his father's family, then it is your first responsibility to put your child's welfare above your husband's feelings.
2006-06-06 06:07:46 · answer #1 · answered by bellegurl17 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think this is definitely a big problem and a huge decision to make. His logic is that why spend the money if he has perfectly willing family members to do it. Unfortunately, if his family members are as you say they are, I wouldn't think they would be much of a good influence to a small child. The more a child is around a person, the more they learn from them..It could be unhealthy for him mentally. If you don't want your child around any negativity(which I'm sure is the case) then I would suggest you stand firm to not letting your husband's relatives do it. Maybe you can compromise and find a relative of yours or something. Good luck!
2006-06-06 06:10:31 · answer #2 · answered by estephania2182 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Do not let his family watch your son!! Even if they don't hurt him, he will be growing up around bad influences. Find a good sitter or daycare, research and interview caregivers very thoroughly. This is your son's life, and what happens to him in his early years will stay with him and affect the rest of his life. Your son's well being is MUCH MORE important than any amount of money! Talk to your husband, and explain to him (try to do this without insulting his family) that your son needs to have good, reliable care for him to grow up to be a confident, successful and productive person.
2006-06-06 06:11:39 · answer #3 · answered by latitude 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'm sure because it's your husband's family and he loves them he might be a little more blind to see all the details that you do.
Don't try to accuse or fight with him because of course he will defend his family.
Instead tell him that you will have a greater peice of mind if your child were in day care where it would be a liscensed facility that is child proof and provides constant attention and supervision. Tell him that is something happened to your child at his families house they could lose everything - a day care facility is different.
Plus day care will also provide the ability for your child to socialize and make friends. Your son will learn various social skills like sharing and taking turns, build his immune system by being around other children - plus he will learn to become more independent.
Try to bring up the positives of day care instead of the negatives about his family.
2006-06-06 07:20:41 · answer #4 · answered by OohLaLa 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Go with your own instincts. Your better off if your judgement on your inlaws are not looking good shoots put your son in day care. At least you would have a peace of mind that he is being cared for by people who are qualified to do so.
2006-06-06 07:09:38 · answer #5 · answered by localgirl420 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I am sure that your husband loves your son as much as you do. One thing to bring to his attention during the next argument is what would happen to your son if he was with your husband's sisters the next time they are arrested. Your son would be taken into Child Protective Services and both of you would have your parenting ablilty questioned. Ask your husband if this is something he would really want to happen to your family...
2006-06-06 07:21:04 · answer #6 · answered by princess9702 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think you are doing the right thing. You should not send your child to a home that you do not feel comfortable with. If something were to happen with your child there he could be taken away from you, especially since it is family he would be staying with. Stick with your daycare, it sounds like the best bet to me.
2006-06-06 06:07:06 · answer #7 · answered by Nicole M 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
go with ur instinct! I know a family like this, where a mother has let her step-father, who has raped her own sisters, babysit her kids! It is definately asking for trouble, who knows what could happen? INSIST on a sitter.
Good luck!
2006-06-06 06:05:03 · answer #8 · answered by Aimee 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
What if you comprimise and let your son go over there for a week and if all looks good then fine, but if not then you can say told you so?!
2006-06-06 06:05:15 · answer #9 · answered by sexzbich 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
um....how about you stay home and watch the kids? Now theres a concept. It requires a little sacrifice but pays huge dividends.
2006-06-06 06:05:31 · answer #10 · answered by nudistcoupleinor 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋