what should i know before going to a funeral of someones I did not know very well but do wish to pay my last respects and offer condolonce to widow. Other than dressing conservatively. Bring flowers ? Stay in the back and shut up ? See the widow and then sit down and shut up ?
2006-06-06 05:42:24 · 10 answers · asked by bbq 6 in Society & Culture ➔ Etiquette
You don't need to bring anything to the funeral, call the funeral home or church ahead of time and find out if the family is requesting donations to anything and make a contribution if you wish. Most likely there will be a guest book at the funeral for you to sign. The widow isn't going to remember who all attended but later on she will look through the book. You could send her a sympathy card in the mail, that would also be a really nice gesture, even though you don't know her, she would really like to see the impact her husband had on other people. If you would like to say something to her personally, it would be fine, just pick an appropriate opportunity. I've been to funerals where the family is lined up waiting for people to give their condolences and I've been to others where people gathered after to speak with the family. It totally depends on the situation, just be considerate of the family.
2006-06-06 09:06:57 · answer #1 · answered by disneychick 5 · 4⤊ 0⤋
If you did not know the deceased very well, then by all means go to the funeral and tell the widow you are sorry for her loss. Approach her very calmly and introduce yourself and tell her your relation to the deceased (i.e. how you knew him). Most likely she will extend her hand for you to shake. If she does not, then extend your hand first. While you shake, look her kindly in the eye and say, "I am very sorry for your loss. [Name of deceased] will be greatly missed by everyone."
She will most likely thank you for your kind regards. Once she does this (or does not do this) quickly and politely move on so that other funeral guests may talk to the widow.
It is not necessary to bring flowers, but it is always a nice gesture. It is truly up to you if you want to introduce yourself to other guests you don't know well. However, keep in mind that a funeral is not a networking event. This is not the time to get into details about you, your work, your hobbies, etc.
2006-06-06 20:45:28 · answer #2 · answered by Eames 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Usually there is a wake at the funeral home during the day and or evening before the funeral. This is usually when the family of the deceased will have a receiving line to greet the people who have come to wish their condolences to the family of the deceased. It is considered polite to sign the guest book at the wake, wait in line and let the family know that you are deeply sorry for their loss and let them know who you are and how you knew the deceased. I always bring a card and or Mass card with me and after I talk to the family I leave the cards on the card pedestal/table next to the deceased. I then kneel and say a prayer for the deceased. The funeral usually takes place at a church or synagogue and this is usually not the time to talk to the family as they will be overcome with their loss.
2006-06-06 20:50:50 · answer #3 · answered by mom of 2 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you knew the family, acknowledge the members of the family you know, then sit in the back. If you did not know the family, go, pay your respects and be done with it. The family is usually not going to notice everyone there anyway and probably will not question your motives for being there. If there is a reception I would advise you not to go unless you are invited. Flowers are not necessary unless you know the family or widow. Other than that, pay your respects.
2006-06-06 14:03:43 · answer #4 · answered by thechosenoneortwo 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Dress nicely, approach the widow respectfully, say I am sorry for your loss, maybe touch her hand or forearm while you say this, then go sit down and be quiet and be sure your cell phone is off....Find out from the obituary if they are accepting memorials for a charity or for kids or something and use teh money that you would spend on flowers for that.
2006-06-07 16:48:58 · answer #5 · answered by turtle girl 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you didnt know them well, you dont need to bring anything. Flowers are always nice.
Just dress well, say how sorry you are to the family, and sit through it.
2006-06-06 12:46:47 · answer #6 · answered by Kutekymmee 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You got it- just show up , greet the widow, and be supportive
How I how funerals!
2006-06-06 13:43:05 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
flowers are a waist of money, i think. when i attend a funereal i make a donation in the family's name to a cause they are close to. if the person died of a heart attack, make a donation to the American heart Association.
2006-06-06 13:02:40 · answer #8 · answered by maria_cd_in_training 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You don't need to bring anything. You don't have to hide in the back. Just sit in the middle.
2006-06-06 14:15:52 · answer #9 · answered by Simply Lovely 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Tell them to get a life and stop being so sad! It's stupid.......I bet that's what you're thinking anyway! LMAO
2006-06-06 15:34:10 · answer #10 · answered by molly m 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋