I love my girlfriend. When we started dating, I told her that we should postpone sex until marriage. And she agreed. Down the road, am finding it a problem. Am 25, she is 22. I have felt the sex urge grow, yet we cant marry now since she has one year to finish school. Am growing impatient as I feel a year for me to abstain is too much. Yet I find it strange to ask her for sex when I am the one who proposed that we postpone it. What should I do?
2006-06-06 03:04:06 · 12 answers · asked by lone 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
No matter what you may feel. No one "needs" sex. Remember that she agreed to this because she loves you. Obviously it had some significant meaning to both of you. Just imagine how much more special your wedding night will be if you wait. But, if you still find yourself fighting these urges, then talk to her about it. Don't ask her for sex, but do tell her how you're feeling. It will benefit both of you if you express your feelings to each other and it will create a stronger bond between you. Good luck, and best wishes in your future marriage!
2006-06-06 03:13:31 · answer #1 · answered by BamaBelle 2 · 3⤊ 0⤋
Don't ask for it - just let it flow. Sometimes, sex talk is difficult to deal with at first, there is the chance of awkwardness on the progression of the talk.
If it happens (sex), and she allows you to, and she returns to your givings, then it happens. Actually, as long as you have the right intentions, and YOU REALLY LOVE HER and you did not want to do it for lusty reasons, WHY NOT? Once my literature teacher asked us, what is more sacred - sex between unmarried couples who love each other or sex between couples bounded by marriage, but don't actually love each other? Let's face the fact - not all married couples got married because of love, right? THe sacredness and essence of sex comes out when it is turned into "making love". If you're under that umbrella, then there's nothing to be afraid of - just ACCEPT and be ready for the possible consequences. Also, don't forget to use protection so as not to destroy her schooling. BTW, you never know, she might have been having the urge as well. Just go on loving her if you really do, and everything will turn out okay.
but of course - if you have proposed it, it might be of real meaning to you, so THINK THINK THINK and THINK first.
Goodluck!
2006-06-06 10:16:12 · answer #2 · answered by kia 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
As a Christian I think it's wrong to have sex anyway outside of marriage, as it is the most intimate form of union. You should be a sacred whole.
However, if neither of you are Christians, you simply need to agree. Each to their own. Maybe if you aren't both consenting to sex you could be intimate in other ways. Learn to massage or something like that.
Bear in mind the consequences as well. What happens if contraception fails and she becomes pregnant?
2006-06-06 10:12:18 · answer #3 · answered by ecb 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You should talk to her, after all there is nothing wrong with sex between 2 consenting adults. She might be feeling the same. Remember that you set the rules, so if she likes things the way they are, then you will just have to wait!!!!
2006-06-06 10:18:27 · answer #4 · answered by break 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Tell her how you feel. She may even feel the same. Sex is nothing dirty or to be ashamed of and l wish more people would realise that.
lts clear you love one another, love is all you need, believe me.
Just because you don't have rings on your fingers doesn't make you any less ready.
lf she wants to do it to then go for it, however if she doesn't, then you have to respect that.
2006-06-06 11:53:08 · answer #5 · answered by London girl 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you are committed to her and wish to marry her, your decision to have sex is yours and hers to make--and it's perfectly appropriate to change your position on this. She may feel that she wants to wait until marriage, and that is her right. You can tell that you are committed to her if you are willing to wait. If you cannot wait, then I would end this relationship and date others, absolutely. You should be with someone you LOVE without question, whether you are sexually intimate with her or not.
2006-06-06 10:43:16 · answer #6 · answered by marsvenusgirl 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Talk to her and tell her how you feel. She may already have the same thoughts as you. You're both old enough to make the decision sensibly.
2006-06-06 10:38:08 · answer #7 · answered by Munster 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Go with BamaBelle
2006-06-06 10:36:54 · answer #8 · answered by violeo 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
ask her whether she is ready to acept ur wish.if she say no 2 u no way u have 2 wait
2006-06-06 10:08:24 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sorry dude. Next time you feel the urge to suggest something.....DONT!!!
2006-06-06 11:49:18 · answer #10 · answered by tedious 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋