What will God do to save me from mean men ?

Question

I wonder if there has been a curse on me. I was raped at age 12 by a man my fathers age. My father was in the military and was often very tough and subject to rages. I ended up even in my spiritual life subject to ministers who had anger problems. My friend even told me " i am concerned about you..you end up with men who abuse you ". I have even seemed to pick lovers that are abusive. They seem fine at first then turn out to be very volitile. What the heck is my problem? Why have i been a magnet for mean and angry and even viloent men ? Is it a spiritual curse ?I really do not pick these men on purpose. Please give me advice.I am 18 now and I cant take this anymore. Its been to long.

Answer 1

Make Jesus the Lord or your life. His love is always gentle and pure. Jesus only has our best interests at heart. He loves with an unconditional love.

http://www.chick.com/information/general/salvation.asp

Answer 2

You have to remember that you're 100% whole in and of yourself.

You don't need a man to have a full life. If you find someone you care about, then fine, but don't think that without a man, you can't function.

You're only 18, and I'm sorry you seem to have had bad experiences with men. I would reccomend taking a break from relationships for a while. . .get to know yourself a bit, and then when you do, you'll probably find a magnetism to a different kind of man exists in your life.

I did something like this for myself, and it's made all the difference.

Do whatever you feel is right, but above all, don't judge yourself on whose woman you are. . .in reality, you are and always have been your own woman.

Answer 3

Allow God to choose someone for you. God ALWAYS knows what is best for us. And you are too young to be thinking of trying to find someone. Enjoy your life in the Lord while you are still young. Make new memories with the Lord so that these memories will be more than your old memories from the past. And I am not talking about destroying your life by going out and drinking and smoking and drugging but enjoy the life that God intends for you. You will always have a choice and God will NEVER take that away from you and He loves you and wants the best for you and it will be up to you to choose if you want what is best for you or if you want God's plan for your life. God has someone perfect for you just hold on and listen for God's voice.

Right now you attract that sort of men because that is all you know. So trust the Lord and let the Lord work on you at the same time you can pray for that man you have a desire for in your life and the Lord will work on him as well. God is always about renewing and making things new. I too was raped when I was little and now I am with a man who God intended for me. But that only came about because of God and obeying him. He has good things in store for us. So just trust him.

Answer 4

Breaking the cycle: Difficult, but doable with help
Domestic violence is part of a continuing cycle that's difficult to break. If you're in an abusive situation, you may recognize this pattern:

Your abuser strikes using words or actions.
Your abuser may beg for forgiveness, offer gifts or promise to change.
Your abuser becomes tense, angry or depressed.
Your abuser promises to stop but repeats the abusive behavior.
Typically each time the abuse occurs, it worsens, and the cycle shortens. Breaking this pattern of violence alone and without help is difficult.

"When you live in an environment of chaos, stress and fear, you start doubting yourself and your ability to take care of yourself," says Patterson. "It can really unravel your sense of reality and self-esteem."

So it's important to recognize that you may not be in a position to resolve the situation on your own. You may need outside help, and that's OK. Without help, the abuse will likely continue. Leaving the abusive relationship may be the only way to break the cycle.

Call your local battered women's shelter, they have counselor 24/7 that would love to talk to you.

Answer 5

Well it is not our job to question God, but I understand it was/is a trying time for you. I have to think that everything good and even bad happens for a reason. I try to think of the bad thing as a time to learn from other mistakes or even our own. He may be trying to teaching you to forgive? He may be making us stronger. I can assure you if not a curse, it just feels like one.

Remember, Jesus loves everyone in the world, everyone, and his own kind (children) nailed him to the cross, you know that hurt him. Satan was a Angel before he sinned and God loved him above all his creations, and it had to hurt God to cast Lucifer out of heaven to the earth, then to the ground...

Jesus walk on earth wasn't a easy one, I guess our isn't suppose to be either. I know alot of Christians and they also have had very hard lives, but I know alot of non Christians that also have the same hard bad luck...

Answer 6

Well you seem to say that you are not intentionaly looking for this type of man...but being as I am a man I know for a fact all men are not mean and evil...So there must surely be an error in your judgement when picking men...Now I would suggest Christian counseling and prayer. grow loser to God and the holy spirit can lead you in directions that God would have you go...all of us are imperfect to some extent so dont expect perfection but all men are not going to be mean and abusive and no woman should permit that.

Answer 7

First off God is NOT testing you. Do not listen to that junk. I want you to know that people are trained a way to act in the military and most of time they do not know how to deal with people outside the military. Please find a woman to talk to. If you are in a larger city, try a rape crisis center. This was a horrible thing that happened to you. You will be surprised on how many girls react just the way that you did.
http://www.ibiblio.org/rcip//effectsofrape.html
http://www.rainn.org/counseling.html http://www.ibiblio.org/rcip//crisiscenters.html#hotlines

Answer 8

Strwberry gal is right. It is a cycle of abuse-that is what leads you to these people--it is sorta what you know and you don't want to but you don't even know you are doing it. It is not God, it is the devil. There are cruel people who prey on insecure and vulnerable girls like you. You are insecure and naive to some extent because you are young. It is good that you want to stop this stuff from happening to you. Please, please, please.. go to see a psychologist or psychotherapist. I have and they are great. Find one you feel comfortable with. It takes about two years sometimes to really be honest with one completely but you will benefit from seeing one almost immediately. So do it and learn how to have healthy and worthwhile relationships of all types in your life. God Bless!

Answer 9

Oh boy! I'm very sorry to hear of your stuggles. Well GoD will protect you! Look at Joseph!! his brothers basically sentenced him to death and what did God do? He exhaulted him and put him in a position to help his brothers after all those years, Just really give your heart to the lord about and ask him what purpose is it for you to go throught these trials! And always walk in LOVE!!!LOL... it's hard...I'm still trying too.... but Love will take you places.

Answer 10

Cursed? No. Incapable of good judgment? Maybe.

Patience is important in finding a good man. If you jump at someone without really and truly getting to know them well, things like that can happen.

Yes, you have had a tough life. It is now up to you to make good choices to be good to yourself.

Answer 11

stop dating for a while. concentrate on your school or work - it will give you confidence and indepenence.

Then analyse what all those men had in common, besides the anger, and why you were attracted to them. Hopefully you'll figure out a way to detect nice guys.

God can certainly give you strength, but will not deliver Mr. Right on a plate - you gotta put in some effort yourself.