Did anyone here lose their virginity under 12?

Question

let me rephrase this: No, but I would like some tips on how to deal with a friend who has lost their virginity under twelve and has become pregnant...

NO NOT ME!!! I'm an angel! :) but my friend is 11 and has lost her virginity and regrets it. She feels stressed out and has a chance of becoming pregnant. i swear its not me.

Answer 1

no...why do you care...did you?

Answer 2

Can I just preface my comment by pointing out I'm a guy in case you haven't inferred that from my nickname? Just it may save time if you feel a guy couldn't add anything relevant to this question. Ok:

I was 15. Even at that time, I wasn't equipped to deal with it. A couple of years later I had an experience that had a big impact on my life that was due to me becoming sexually active earlier than maybe I should have. I have no hangups or issues with this now, but I have a little experience on this topic (albeit not as much as some). Your friend is in a really tough position. It is exceptionally unlikely that she is in a position where she will be able to effectively raise a child. If you accept that - or more importantly if she does, and I sincerely hope so - then the decision becomes whether to have the child and offer it for adoption - which will fulfill the dreams of some struggling and worthy couple, or to terminate the pregnancy, which brings its own ethical considerations that relate to her belief structure. You don't mention how advanced the pregnancy is, but most rational people with views on this second option consider that pertinent to a decision to terminate. She needs to do some research and see where that leaves her belief-wise - and if she has an objective friend (maybe you?) to help her with this that's good, as she is going to be emotionally influenced by hormonal imbalances right now.

All this is very simplistic and perhaps a bit trite, and for that I apologise, but it's an incredibly thorny issue. The main point is that your friend needs to consider options that do not include raising the child herself, as she is a child herself. Perhaps some objective counselling could be a good idea?

Addition: Please be careful when reading comments like those of clydachowl below me. I don't doubt it is true, but circumstances like that are very much in the minority and very much the sort of thing your friend will be looking for right now as a justification for keeping and raising the child if she is pregnant. Please please keep in mind that although this sort of thing can happen, it's rare, and I really believe it's better to make a rational decision based on my prior comments than to build any false hope based on an exceptional circumstance.

Answer 3

How old!! My sister was stressed at her daughter being 15years old and expecting her baby in sept!!
U say your friend is 11....thats only 3and a half years older than my little girl...thats sick. How old was the boy?
Surely it would class the male as a Nonce, Child Molester?
Right now u want to get ur friend to go to the family planning clinic or her doctors, and make sure she isnt pregnant-if she is, she would probably be advised to terminate the pregnancy because her body isnt developed enough at her age to carry a baby- theres a huge risk to her and the baby so it would be safer 4 her not to have it. Even the people that dont agree with abortion have to agree that a child as young as this there isnt really much of an option apart from abortion, even then its not really an option!
From that point, the doctor or staff at the clinic will advise ur friend on everything... please make her go....if shes pregnant and as young as u say, then its not a case of being scared of telling her parents its stayin alive that matters!!

Answer 4

OK THIS IS STUPID. I mean really stupid why on earth would you ask the question. Points to make, 1 that age it isn't loosing your virginity its being RAPED, and 2 if its boredom its wrong. The day when people make it OK is the day rapist get a free hand at our children, and weather you did or didn't we don't want it. Take a step back and ask yourself why you needed to know such a thing, i hope that any parent out there keeps there kids safe not from life but from those who wish to do nothing more than rape a 12 year old. Stupid question.

Answer 5

She should definetly tell her parents. You should be there for her as a friend but if you are the same age, it will be a huge strain on you if you try to tackle this without adult help. She should get to a doctor. I don't know about the particular laws where she is but in some cases, parents can not be informed if she asks the doctor not to say anything. Although I think there may be some places/circumstances where this rule doesn't apply to minors.

Answer 6

No i was 18. Did you? I can't imagine a 12 year old would know what to do .

actually i can believe it, what a sad society we live in

An under 12 year old is pregnant. An under 12 year old cannot possibly be responsible for a baby. Oh what a horrible dilemma. You need to find an adult and talk this one through. Poor wee thing, she must be terrified. Then again, what was she doing having sex? Poor wee thing. Good luck.

Answer 7

I was in school with a girl who lost her s on her 11 birthday and she had her first child when she was 13. she is 36 now and a grandmother and loving it.
Still with the same guy as well.

Answer 8

No I was 19. This sort of thing terrifies me as my little sis is only 12 and the thought of her getting into this sort of situation makes me want to wrap her in cotton wool and hide her away from the world!

Answer 9

The very best thing you can do for your friend is get her to tell her parents urgently. Tehre are other consequences of having unprotected sex than pregnancy. Your friend needs an adult to guide her in her next steps whether she is pregnant or not.

Answer 10

doesn't look like any of the other morons are going to be any help and i wish i could be more helpful but all i can suggest is reassure your friend that it's not the end of the world and that you'll be there to help her through it and take it one step at a time and I'm sure she will be OK, first step is to ask help from an adult like a teacher or doctor and let them help you further, good luck:o)

Answer 11

Under 12 pregnant?Parents should be hanged