I started seeing a guy 7 years ago who was in the army. He and i fell in w/ one another and the only reason we didn't make a commitment w/ one another was because he was getting deported overseas. He's seen so many marriages and breakups between couples who's been deported and he didn't want that to happen w/ us. Well, just recently he and i came into contact w/ one another while out. He's now retired from the army and he said he's been looking for me. The thing is, im married now. After spending some time alone with this guy i realized that im still so in love w/ him and he still feels the same for me. Don't get me wrong. I love my husband. But im IN love w/ this guy. What should i do??? Im so confused about things.
2007-12-31 12:49:01 · 20 answers · asked by brwn_id_grl_4u 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
You're married now. If you can't keep things on a friendly basis with your ex, I suggest breaking it off completely.
If the roles were reversed and it was your husband in this situation, what would you want him to do?
2007-12-31 12:52:19 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 3⤊ 0⤋
You feel like you're still in love with your ex because the two of you never really ended your relationship. It was more like, well we love each other and we're good for each other, but it's the wrong time. It wasn't a case of the wrong person. I think it's natural for old feelings to come back like they are, but since you are married and you love your husband, you owe it to yourself to never, ever contact this guy again. You have to accept that if this was truly meant to be, you two would be together. He needs you to let him go so he can be free to find someone else too. Being deployed is extremely stressful emotionally and psychologically, and it doesn't surprise me that he came looking for you. Do him a favor and give him permission to move on. Since you've already crossed a boundary line by seeing him privately, give him permission by never seeing him or speaking to him again. He will understand.
2007-12-31 14:08:24 · answer #2 · answered by No Shortage 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
the question is how is your marraige? could you just be looking for extra attention? you need to let go of the past. im sure by now you probably know all there is to know about your husband, but you married him for a reason. and that was 7 years ago, you guys probably arent even the same people anymore. its just a grass is greener on the other side thing, if anything happens you will probably find yourself missing your husband.
2007-12-31 13:13:44 · answer #3 · answered by brynniebean 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think you should run from this guy as fast as you can,if the plan for you was to be with this guy you would not have married another,you said you love your husband,well stay with him,the grass is never greener on the other side
2007-12-31 13:02:08 · answer #4 · answered by deedee 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Marriage is a lifelong commitment that you make, vowing to forsake all others (not forsake all others, unless someone really good shows up). If you are unhappy with your husband, this is something you need to address independent of this other man. If you are happy with your marriage, then the appearance of this other man should just be viewed as something that solidified your resolve to be faithful to your husband. Having an affair is never the right choice, and leaving your husband for someone else is only slightly less bad. You need to make up your mind about your husband, as if you had never run into this other man. If you would stay with him without this man, then you need to stay with him. If you would still be considering going, even if you had never met this man again, then perhaps you should talk to your husband, perhaps trying counseling, to address the problem.
2007-12-31 12:59:46 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
get him on the side. you only live once.
2007-12-31 12:55:49 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think that if you truly love him more than your husband that you should explain that to your husband and go marry your true love. You will only get this one chance most likely.
2007-12-31 12:53:12 · answer #7 · answered by sloansterr 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Stop seeing him at once and forget about him. It will only cause damage and hurt. RUN!
2007-12-31 12:52:59 · answer #8 · answered by daddyjohndeer 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋
you must love the man your with or you would not of married him so stay wright were you are.
2007-12-31 12:52:48 · answer #9 · answered by tym v 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
The simple answer and the one you probably don't want to hear is that you are married and you have to separate yourself from this other man if you want your marriage to thrive at all.
2007-12-31 12:51:55 · answer #10 · answered by K.F. 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋