How to get a life?

Question

I just left university where I hated it for 2 years,and have depression and due to my unhappiness hypersensitivity to emotions and feelings (mostly bad ones these days of course). I am trying to find a therapist, so that is one step, but since I have been away for 2 years, any one I used to know doesn't want to know me because they are so hurt I ignored them for 2 years (I wasn't in my right mind and I wanted people to get on with their lives and be happy, and I didn't want to bother them).
Since I should have had a new university life but didn't, back home it is empty and dark for me; my life is completely isolated. I was isolated in university, totalling 2 years since I left my happy life, and I'm so tired of it. I used to do well with girls and have friends, but I simply don't know any one. I am going to university starting october 2008 but how do I get a life now. It has been a shock going from being loved by a fair few girls to nothing, and that's what I want to focus on aswell.

Answer 1

Unfortunately, when you expect life to be great, if often isn't. Many people at uni are no more than overgrown school kids- and it's just no better than being back at school. Home can seem a strange place- like you've grown out of it- when you are an adult you need your own space. I'd suggest going to uni to study- nothing more- don't expect a great social life. Join clubs(anywhere- not just at uni) where you might meet people that have the same interests/outlook as you- what do you enjoy? If you look for love - you won't find it- when you don't- it turns up. How about catching up with old friends? Otherwise, just open yourself up to new experiences- a change is a good as a rest so to speak. Keep your life varied and don't dwell on things too much- you can over analyse it and end up depressed. If you go to uni lacking in confidence it will give off bad vibes- go there and don't give a damn- be yourself and be bold- if you like someone- ask them out- they may be flattered- if not - they've only said no- big deal- it won't be on the news!!- move on to the next one- all the best.

Answer 2

Don't worry too much. I had much the same feelings when I moved away from my old haunts with my job. I was doing my professional qualification at the time and most of my evenings were taken up with study. When I did go out..well I just felt lost. Then I met my wife to be. There is light at end of the tunnel, it's amazing the difference a day can make.

Answer 3

acknowledging there is a problem from within is a huge step forward already. Sometimes we do things as human beings because it is expected of us from our peers whether that be parents/guardians or people we admire or otherwise look up to, sometimes we expect too much of ourselves and that can deflate ones ego if we don't live up to that expectation. I would set the achievement bar at a level that can be conquered EVENTUALLY, then take a step back and see how much air you've cleared. In life, all things are possible it's only a matter of how and when.