To what extent do taboos around sexuality destroy opportunities for intimacy in relationships?

Question

Some people are wary of public displays of affection.
Others do not feel comfortable about nudity.
Many of us think long and hard about whether and how to declare affection.
Almost all of us consider the choice to have a physical relationship very seriously.

Have we perhaps become too introspective? Are we over analyzing the way we express ourselves?

To what extent do taboos around sexuality destroy opportunities for intimacy in relationships?

Answer 1

I think that for women particularly, certain taboos have affected their capacity to achieve sexual gratification. Women tend to be much more inhibited than men (in general) when it comes to sexuality. Why do I say this? Because the number one sexual disorder affecting women is the inability to achieve orgasm. And in my opinion, the reason that many women have a hard time achieving orgasm is because they either do not know their own bodies well enough (through masturbation or experimentation) to know what brings them pleasure, or, they rely solely on men to know what to do in order to achieve arousal and climax. Women have a hard time communicating their sexual needs, as well. They hesitate to participate in their own arousal...thinking that it's somehow "dirty" or "unladylike" to talk about sex, or to touch themselves, or to show their partners what they need or desire, sexually-speaking. Then there's the issue of nudity..and yes, I believe that women have a harder time feeling comfortable in their own skin. The barrage of media images of surgically-altered women who look like Barbie dolls does a real disservice to women's self-images. If a woman can't feel attractive to her partner when she's nude, this sets the stage for sexual dysfunction. Women need to feel that their partners find them sexually attractive. If women can't see themselves being attractive, then they perceive that their partners don't find them attractive, either. This causes further inhibition.

Answer 2

Nope... I assume they actually want to have a relationship rather than just a casual encounter. I'd think they're interested in me as a person and they want to get to know me better before we rush into anything. I don't see how being responsible and having respect for youself would be seen as "dysfunctional"... one of the main things that would put me off a person I was dating is if they wanted to have sex too soon. Sexual norms are only defined by society's standards anyway... in a culture that puts so much emphasis on meaningless sex, then yeah I might be considered dysfunctional. That's ok with me :)

Answer 3

What you are talking about with displays of affection or declaring affection are not societal taboos. They are personal preferences.

We have sexual taboos for sound reasons---like those against having sex with our sisters, parents, brothers or with children---that have to do with the physical and/or emotional health of individuals. Even with lesser taboos like having group sex or public nudity they don't bring about more opportunities for intimacy i.e. the opposite is actually the result because they lessen the inclination to form strong bonds with any one particular person. Intimacy by its very nature is more than just sex.

Answer 4

depends on what kind of culture you are in. A girlfriend who is from a very sexually restrictive culture (middle east, Japan) may be less apt to accept or tolerate a sexual taboo. The degree of strictness will determine the amount of influence the taboo may have in destroying opportunity. If the relationship is w/ someone from strict culture w. a degree of 10 (Iran), a taboo (homosexuality, pedo, bisex) would destroy any opportunity for a sexual relationship.
high degree countries: japan, Iran, Saudia Arabia, Iraq
middle: U.S.A, Mexico
low degree: france, germany, switz

Answer 5

I think taboos in general are terrible. I can understand nervousness if you are with many partners, people are always going to have different comfort levels. But if you are in a long term monogamous relationship I feel you should be open and comfortable with that person. You should let your partner know where you draw the line so there is never any uncomfortable situations. If your up to anything then great but not everyone is so adventurous.

Answer 6

That would certainly depend on the particular taboo and culture to which it applied. For instance, the taboos regarding brother/sister relations and other forms of incest are founded on sound genetic reasoning. The taboo regarding pedophilia is based on psychological issues and the damage that it can cause. Taboos regarding bestiality can be linked to both disease and animal welfare issues. Taboos against necrophilia can also be attributed to health/disease issues. The question is too broad.

Answer 7

Taboos? It is quite empirically suggested and from culture to culture, that human coitus is a private matter, with the ancillary matters arranged around the act in a reflective manner. What is taboo in sexuality is incest. What is our evolved and variant reproductive strategies is nature via nurture.

Answer 8

Taboos increase the opportunity for intimacy, they don't decrease it. Without taboos, people become "used up" way too quickly.

Answer 9

Absolutely, the taboos destroy opportunities for intimacy. Many people don't believe in having sex outside of marriage for one so in a sense that destroys opportunities for intimacy that could be found before one is married and chances for intimacy with other people while married.

However, is this really a bad thing with so many sexually transmitted diseases and unwanted pregnancies?

Answer 10

like it or not, most of us try to abide by the rules of our gender roles, created by the people in our society. I think people hold back in alot of ways, and not just when it comes to sex. I think that gay people express themselves alot more freely than everyone else and are probably alot happier. Ok, that sounded cliche, but it's so true. I think people do what they do because they're afraid of rejection, so they don't act on their impulses. They don't do what feels right, but they do what would be the 'right thing' to do.