Why it is so cool to be a woman
We can get rid of leg hair without pretending that we do a lot of cycling/swimming or any other sport that would require aerodynamic legs.
We absently hum tunes from musicals without anyone being suspect of our sexuality.
When we buy a vibrator it is glamorous. When men buy a blow up doll it's pathetic.
Should we wake up looking like something the cat dragged in, we can fix it with cosmetics.
We can have partners that are years younger than us without being called dirty old perverts.
We can scare male bosses with mysterious gynecological disorder excuses.
Systems support men always return our calls, and are nice to us when we blow up our computers.
We know that Tetris is the computer game to end all games.
We got off the Titanic first.
Our boyfriend's clothes make us look elfin and gorgeous. They look like complete dorks in our clothes.
We have total control over our eyebrows.
We can be groupies. Male groupies are stalkers.
It's cool to be a daddy's girl. It's sad to be a mommy's boy.
We can cry to get out of speeding fines.
The thrill of surprising people by being good at darts... and pool... and football.
We live longer, so we can be cantankerous old biddies wearing inappropriate clothes and shouting at strangers... men die earlier so we get to cash in on the life insurance.
We know that games are fun, but don't believe there's a direct correlation between the size of our scores and the size of our... womanhood.
Taxis stop for us.
We get drunk quicker and cheaper.
We have no desire to arrange our possessions in alphabetical order. Ever.
We've never fancied a cartoon character or the central figure in a computer game.
It does not enhance our social standing to understand the inner workings of a 'ruck' (or any other football thing). But we look incredibly cool if we do.
We never recognize ourselves in aspects of Mr. Bean. Ever.
We don't look like a frog in a blender when dancing.
2007-12-30 08:01:15 · 29 answers · asked by Anonymous in Society & Culture ➔ Cultures & Groups ➔ Senior Citizens
brilliant Q! have a star
2007-12-31 00:13:51 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
4+3=7
2007-12-30 08:04:47 · answer #2 · answered by John D Potato 2 · 1⤊ 3⤋
MEN ARE BETTER THAN WOMEN
Directions! DIRECTIONS !?! We don't need no directions. We got GPS and we know how to use it!
We drive taxis and ignore women passengers.
Women stalkers are evil biddies who steal babies from cradles, wreck happy homes and hide weapons in their tushes. obssessed men are just mommy's boys.
Women are cheap dates who turn into sluts after one grasshopper.
Women have no eyebrows, just pencil marks to memorialize their daily tself-torture.
Women wax their bodies then rub aloe lotion all over to soothe the pain. Men comb their pubes.
Women stuff socks into their bras and wear high heels so they don't seem insignificant. Or at least to distract men from the truth.
Women play tetris. Men form squads and blow down doors.
Women grow old and wrinkled, men grow distinguished.
Women's boobs become flat and droopy, men's balls hang lower and slap louder.
Women hum songs from musicals and hope men realize they want to suck some sack, men sing songs from musicals and fight off the young girls who never heard of "Camelot."
Women go to jail for driving slow in the high speed lane, men recognize highway patrol vehicle silhouettes.
Men love letting women win at games, they turn into amoral sluts every time.
Men know where to find the 3/8-inch box wrench while a woman is still checking her skirt and cussing about the use of "wench."
Men know about the infield fly rule and women are waving swatters.
2007-12-30 09:22:29 · answer #3 · answered by Der Lange 5 · 4⤊ 1⤋
I resent that bit about wearing women's clothes. The lady I work for as a maid one day a week says I look quite good when I am wearing my uniform.
2007-12-30 10:12:14 · answer #4 · answered by Maid Angela 7 · 4⤊ 0⤋
Nope, admiration not jealousy.
Except for the part about getting off the Titanic first.
But a very enjoyable question.
2007-12-30 08:29:27 · answer #5 · answered by deepndswamps 5 · 5⤊ 0⤋
NO...
But... I do arrange things in alphabetical order.... i just have a different alphabet than most folks!
And... I've seen a lot of gal's who looked like a hick-up-ing frog in a blender while dancing!
LMAO!!!
2007-12-30 08:22:01 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 6⤊ 0⤋
true.lol
2007-12-30 22:54:04 · answer #7 · answered by HaSiCiT Bust A Tie A1 TieBusters 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Not me - I like the shape and looks of a woman.
2007-12-30 10:39:07 · answer #8 · answered by UncleBuck 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋
What you wrote is funny. I think you meant it as humor. The men I know aren't envious, they like being men. Most of all they like being men so they can be with women.
2007-12-30 08:17:40 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 5⤊ 0⤋
Lots of laughter in this one.
To answer the question: No, most men have way to much ego.
2007-12-30 08:23:43 · answer #10 · answered by curious connie 7 · 5⤊ 0⤋