Men and Women--What's your opinion?

Question

OK: We all know that the vast majority of us have had past relationship. My husband tells me that he has forgotten ALL his past relationships (ex-wife and ex girlfriends). He tells me that most men are wire that way-- once they end a relationship with someone, they don't try to remenisce (sp?) the past. He said it's natural to remember some things that have happened, but once the relationship has ended, all the feelings are out the window etc.
I told him that women are different. Most women will sometimes re-think, rehash, daydream about their exes. Heck sometimes most women(I've actually known some that do miss their exes).
Prior to meeting my husband, I did have an ex that I thought of and missed eventhough I was in a relationship. So I am inclined to believe that this theory is true. So what's your take on this? Who gets over faster, men or women. And do women really misses, think, daydream, wonder about exes while men forgets them once they are no longer part of their lives?

I've actually known a few ladies that have actually gone to trouble tracking down their exes on Myspace. And some told me that they still have great feelings for them. Do men does this kinda thing?? I mean, I once missed an ex but never did anything to track him down.

OK: edit on he has "forgot" all his past. Let's just say he no longer thinks about any of his past. Don't know if that make sense..

BRAVO! Great answers EVERYONE!

For the record: My husband was the one who ended ALL of his previous relationship EXCEPT for his high school sweetheart who dumped him. And the ex-wife moved out of the house but later came back and beg him to get marriage counseling but he declined and had her moved out and file for divorce. His previous ex-gilrfriend before me was dumped in Hawaii during a special night out when she started asking him for a long term commitment. Hmmm...what do you all think? Is that high school sweetheart have any footprints left? That was soo long ago that I doubt that's the case. How about the ex wife? What about the ex girlfriend?? Yikes!!

Answer 1

I don't think it is a man/woman thing, I think it is how each person is wired, and also the circumstances. I've seen both men and women reminisce over past loves, yet I've seen those same men and women totally put other past loves behind them. Maybe your husband just never deeply felt for those past loves, which may be a plus for you!

Answer 2

I don't think it is a man or woman things because there are masculine female and feminine male. this simply means in short, that one is rational and the other is emotional. now to ur question, relationship are life experience u have with someone. now majority of man even if we remember which we do, we don't attach emotions to it. we just remember that it was fun it was about the EVENT not the lady. it is about a style she did in sex not her. now if the guy want the same experience, he might go and look for another lady to do such things with, which will be more fun becos he is doing it with another lady. in his mind he can boast of it. but as for women, they are remembering the feelings, the personality of the man is what is talking to them. now if the present man has the same kind of personality/torch then it will not be hard for her to stop remembering the past man. she is only remembering becos she missed the feelings. trust me I know this!
conclusion for men it is about the event/act. so we can easily drop the lady in the past but the thing with man is that if we have any opportunity with a new or past lady then that is a different case. note the opportunity also means an event/ adventure.
for ladies it is about the feelings/ personalities of the man, the way they make them feel. if the husband that he is with make her feel the same way then she too will drop the man in the past. that is why sex before marriage is dangerous because the lady will be comparing u with her formal men in her mind. and depending on the lady, she might go back to the old man.

Answer 3

My guy said if he sees something that brings back a memory of a past woman then and only then will he think about an ex... I think he's full of SH1T... This question actually got him in a lot of trouble...
As for myself I am always comparing just to see if I made the right choice...
As far as who gets over the ex faster I would have to say women. We can think about the pass, but still move on with the future...

Answer 4

I don't have feelings for any of my exes and while I am a woman, I don't spend my days being over run by emotions. I do admit I have added some ex's on my facebook account, but I've also added people I hated in high school. Curiosity.

You and your husband should really learn that men and women are not as different as you like you think and that while you and your husband may be very different and your group of female friends may be unable to control their emotions and pathetically traditional in their feminine roles, many women are perfectly capable of getting over relationships and moving on and many men are not. This is not a female versus male issue.

Answer 5

I think it might be opposite in my marriage. I really truly don't miss a single ex. They might cross my mind for an instant if something reminds me of them, but I have NO feelings - not even hate- towards any of them. I feel numb or indifferent to all my ex's. For some reason it's quite easy for me to walk away and forget if I'm hurt or fall out of love. I'm not sentimental at all . I'm not a cold hearted B- either. I would feel bad if they got a serious illness I'm sure.

That said, I know my husband has had a hard time dealing with one of his past breakups (before we got together). It was hard for me to understand why. He's more sensitive than me I think. He wonders what his ex's are up to, but I couldn't care less what mine are up to. lol

Answer 6

I only think about someone else, including an old flame, if something was terribly wrong in my current relationship. Otherwise, they are just another page in my history book whom I don't really care to read about anymore. I have met some guys who always talk about their exes and then there's my husband who doesn't even mention them anymore. I think guys like to keep it to themselves. Who knows? They may even think about them more than we do but since they're so emotionally secretive, we will never know.

Answer 7

It all depends on how good the ex's were when performing certain tasks in the sack. If you aren't as good at certain things as some of his ex's were, then of course he'll think and fantasize about those others. With men it's all about which ones give the most pleasure.

Answer 8

In my experience men don't "Forget" about their x but rather turn all feelings to either intense hurt or anger...

I got F*^%ed by my x so all my feelings are of hate right now and years later I'm still trying to get my credit back on track...

So when I DO think of the prick it always ends up with a fanitcy of me tying him down and castrating him.

Answer 9

what he is saying is code for something else...men and women are "wired" differently..but with men usuall when on relationship ends and another one begins,,they don't like to bring the past in to the present,meaning,,he doesn't want to talk to you about things that happened in his past relationship.which is really a good thing.why should you rehash anything from past relationships,it's just asking for trouble...

Answer 10

For us the present relationship is the most important. The past comes to mind only if we are between relationships.