The husband has a good job. The wife stays home and home schools the 2 children. In order to help out, the husband does all the laundry. The husband also pays $200 a month for a housekeeper. The wife cooks meals and goes shopping. Oh, one more thing, she only puts out sex about once a month. Is this equal or is the husband being taken advantage of?
2007-12-29 13:00:14 · 18 answers · asked by BradNahler 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
If the husband considers sex as nothing more than his reward for doing his job as a husband and father he is no more being taken advantage of than his wife is.
Sex should follow love and love should manifest itself in many ways. I think the pitfall for the husband is that he sees his job, the money for the housekeeper and doing the laundry as duty not as acts of love.
I don't know what the wife sees. Not enough information provided. If she sees homeschooling, cooking and shopping as duties, not as acts of love (for the entire family, not just for him) there is a basic problem in this marriage.
That doesn't mean the marriage will fail. What it means is that both husband and wife are missing something they both need and probably want--deep down. I think the telling words in this story are "puts out." A loving wife doesn't put out sex to a loving husband--they make love to each other.
Obviously this relationship contains some of the essential things. Respect, consideration, responsibility. It needs one more thing, and I can only suggest an attitude adjustment, perhaps on the parts of both husband and wife, to achieve the love that should be the core emotion in this marriage.
2007-12-29 13:11:53 · answer #1 · answered by Warren D 7 · 2⤊ 1⤋
If the wife is at home, there is no reason why she can not clean the house herself. She is not homeschooling those kids 7 days a week 24 hours a day. As for shopping, if she can do that she can clean the house. As for sex. I would I want it more. I get it more than that and still want more. I think he is being taken advantage of. maybe start something the housekeeper. Just kidding.
2007-12-29 13:41:55 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
It sounds like she has it made. I think she is taking advantage of you big time. Maybe you could cut the housekeeper down to a few days a week. And have you ever thought she was cheating on you. It doesn't sound like she should be tired from anything, she could at least give you sex once a week.
2007-12-29 13:06:50 · answer #3 · answered by zoey1176 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Sounds like the husband is trying to keep his wife happy. Some would think he's a chump. Happy Wife, Happy Life.
However, the wife has to contribute something. The $200 housekeeper would have to go.
2007-12-29 13:11:03 · answer #4 · answered by beckoningsubstitutes 5 · 2⤊ 1⤋
I'm sure you have talked to her about it. What does she say? And you should know that foreplay starts hours before, right? I'm only saying this as food for thought but are you a delicate lover? Do you try to satisfy her? I mean do you do what she wants you to do, not what you feel like doing? How do you treat her during the day? In a loving way or with criticism and disrespect? I know there is no way I ever turn my man down because he treats me like a queen. But I also treat him like a king.
2007-12-29 13:36:34 · answer #5 · answered by curlies55 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If the wife stays home you don't need a housekeeper. About the sex, you need to ask her why she doesn't want to do it much.
2007-12-29 13:04:18 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 1⤋
If both people are happy then the marriage sounds fine. If either of them feels taken advantage of then there's a problem.
2007-12-29 13:04:52 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋
No one is being taken advantage of unless that person is allowing it. What works for some couples does not mean it will work for others.
2007-12-29 13:23:08 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
As long as the husband and wife are in agreement, there's no problem with the marriage.
2007-12-29 13:13:04 · answer #9 · answered by auntcookie84 6 · 0⤊ 1⤋
You poor poor man. You sound like your in the same boat as a lot of other guys.
2007-12-29 13:05:14 · answer #10 · answered by Lisa D 5 · 0⤊ 1⤋